More stuff happening...need more advice!

[bigboi229]

Well guys, I wrote on here the other day to tell that I had my first gay sex experience. That was OK, but I felt it could've been better since I was wasted. I asked if I should get tested since I gave oral & swallowed, but I still haven't done that. I have had sort of a sore throat since then but I was getting a cold the day before, just not that bad, so I'm not convinced that BJ had anything to do with it. Anyway, now more stuff is happening...

The sex I had days ago (the first one) was with somebody I met at a social function. I didn't know him at all, and I was wasted, so it was in-and-out. I was complaining that he left too quick & didn't seem to like it, but somebody in that other thread said to pretty much stop bitching because it was sex for the hell of it & I enjoyed it so who cares? Anyway, I appreciate that point of view because of what happened yesterday night.

I had my 2nd experience last night. Now, aside of being a frequent user of a 6" Dildo I'd only had any other real gay sex that time a few days ago. I happened to meet another guy last night who was a lot more appealing than the first, and of course I hooked up again. This time, though, instead of feeling unsatisfied, I felt great. I wasn't wasted...though I did have one beer in me that isn't anything...and I not only did what I did with the other guy but more. It was a lot better sex and even though he also didn't stick around long I felt OK with it because after all, it was once again just "casual sex". Nothing more.

Now my questions are these: is it bad that now that I've "cracked open the door" that I'm literally hungry for more all the time? Should I feel bad for letting 2 guys I don't know get it so fast or just take it as what it was? And even though both wore rubbers for the anal, I gave both oral and swallowed both times so I'm guessing I really should get tested if I keep going down this road.

In addition to all this, after my "first experience" I had a good friend of pretty much my entire life over and, due to being drunk, accidentally came out to him. I felt good about this because he was totally fine with it, and said I shouldn't have worried about what he thought because he'd support me whenever, but I'm afraid if I get drunk again I will come out to people that I really am not ready to yet. Or should I just come out to as many as possible, 'cuz it's obvious I enjoyed these encounters more than anything I've had before.

Sorry for a long post of random stuff, but I've got a few minutes before heading out and I'm just curious what you guys think. I appreciate all the feedback in the other thread, you guys have been helpful so far...or at least I thought so.

PS how do you change your status on here because it still says Virgin and I'm obviously not. Is that changeable? >_>

 

[bigboi229]

Nevermind the PS part it's changed now. Lol

 

[slickery]

It's a good idea for anyone who is sexually active to get tested regularly. It's just common sense, and your civil responsibility.

On another note swallowing on the first time...congrats. It took me a good 4 months with my last partner to get the courage to swallow.

As far as what other people think...we aren't you. If you enjoy the way you are living your life at the moment, then enjoy it and don't care what others think. Just make sure you are using protection, and keep track to how much you are drinking before you sleep with people. There are the devious ones that will try and get away without using protection, and at the time it might seem like a good idea, but in the long run it isn't.

 

[josher]

Perhaps the drinking is the more serious problem.

Eratic (and erotic) behavior brought on by alcohol is usually the sign of a problem drinker.

 

[slnattak]

Personally if I were in your shoes I'd slow down a bit, and try to sort out what you really want from life.

You can get lost in a slow-suicide vortex of sexual arousal if you let yourself. And gay men are especially susceptible to this because of a host of factors.

If you want to enjoy yourself like that though understand the risks. No matter how safe you are you can still get a host of things, esp. from sleeping with people you don't really know that well.

I'm not talking about just pure diseases. But also what this might be doing to you emotionally. You're in charge of your own life, you don't have to live a stereotypical gay life if you don't want to, as many men do not find happiness at all in that. You might be the type of gay that would thrive better just coming out in ALL places.

Don't act like the cliche the haters say about gay people.

 

[KaraBulut]

Perhaps the drinking is the more serious problem.

^^^QFT
.........

 

[cardshark]

Personally if I were in your shoes I'd slow down a bit, and try to sort out what you really want from life.

You can get lost in a slow-suicide vortex of sexual arousal if you let yourself. And gay men are especially susceptible to this because of a host of factors.

If you want to enjoy yourself like that though understand the risks. No matter how safe you are you can still get a host of things, esp. from sleeping with people you don't really know that well.

I'm not talking about just pure diseases. But also what this might be doing to you emotionally. You're in charge of your own life, you don't have to live a stereotypical gay life if you don't want to, as many men do not find happiness at all in that. You might be the type of gay that would thrive better just coming out in ALL places.

Don't act like the cliche the haters say about gay people.

I agree with this. I'll also add that you may want to stop getting drunk for now. I'm not saying never drink again, but take a break. At your stage, combining alcohol with sex may be dangerous.

As for swallowing, go ahead and get tested now, but be sure to get tested again in 3-6 months, since it takes time for some std's to show up in tests. Also, in the future, I'd advise not swallowing cum from casual encounters. It is a risky behaviour, in my opinion. Finally, oral sex is safest when condoms are used. I know that turns off a lot of guys, but I personally won't give oral sex outside a relationship without condoms. It's your body, you get to decide the risk vs rewards.

 

[slickery]

What's with all the nana's on the boards?!

He is obviously going through a sort of sexual revolution, we all went through it.

After coming out, and realising it's ok to be who you are it's fun going out and flirting and having a good time, albeit not too good of a time.

Don't worry a "slut phase" is not uncommon, just protect yourself. Go out and be who you want to be. Eventually most people grow out of it and you will figure out what you really want. Everything we do is a learning curve, just enjoy the learning process. But also don't feel like you are obligated to do anything, or do anything you aren't really that into because you think it's "supposed" to happen. Just because you take a guy home doesn't mean you have to go all the way. You'll find that many people you will engage for a night don't really want to go all the way, if any way at all.

 

[billybob109]

I say have all the sex you want but make sure you are safe and remember that it will not turn into anything like relationship wise

 

[G-Lexington]

If you want to go out and get laid by a new guy every night - hell, every hour - that's your call. Just be smart and be safe. That doesn't just mean "condoms", although that's most certainly a part of it. But on top of that, be aware that just because it's "casual sex" for you doesn't mean it's "casual sex" for them. "Feelings" can develop that aren't returned. Make it as clear as you can that you're looking for a fuck, not a boyfriend. Also, there ARE whackjobs out there. Not many, but they're there, and if you're gonna start making the rounds, your odds of meeting one are going to increase. You might want to think "if I have to cut this short and kick his ass out, can I?" And thirdly, just as a heads-up, although you're mostly safe from STD transmission, you ARE going to put yourself in touch with a lot more standard social diseases. So you may have caught the sore throat from your first guy, in fact, but it's no need to panic.

Lex