I have a date this Thursday I'm so nervous. I don't know how to act.
It's just a casual date. I know it's weird to say but i also a little embarrassed that its with guy. Im very open about being bi with people I know but i have never been out in public with a guy. In a romantic way. I'm scared and nervous. My best friend is coming with me it's a double date. So that helps but still.
damn: I am so tired of this site signing me out when I post a long response. Maybe that's a clue to shorten it, then.
1) Don't talk about a romantic date as though everyone around you is going to be whispering "Ooooh, it's two guys." Grow up. Most people won't even notice you.
2) Talk about the place you're meeting and ask him questions: been here before (and don't ask with whom)? Like the food? What kind of food to you like the most?
3) Ask about his hobbies
4) Compliment him once or twice on his shoes/pants/hair/ (NOT his body, okay?) and see if he returns the compliment. And if he does, doesn't brush off the compliment as people with low self-esteem tend to do: "You must be blind: I don't have nice eyes/hair" or whatever". That's a romance killer, if ever there was one. (When a guy did that to me in San Francisco, I knew he lack the slightest confidence in himself and my strong (but tender) personality was ALWAYS going to make him feel like he wasn't my equal.) And one guy I would've stuck with even with that kind of personality? He sabotaged it so much, I had no choice but to break up with him, because he wouldn't let me get any closer to him than the equivalent of 6 feet away. And despite my tough talk, my boyfriends would tell you I'm VERY easy to get along with: I make 'em laugh, act silly, buy em flowers, sing little songs to them (Just to make 'em blush) and am otherwise, a pretty loving guy (learned it from my parents)! So, if you get a compliment that's too much, Just duck your head, say, "Wow, thanks, man. Nobody's told me that before" and blush. (Blushing is highly adorable)
5) Ask him what he likes to do in his free time. Find out his hobbies. If you both like Marvel movies, you've hit the jackpot. That can go on for hours.
6) DON'T be so quick to jump into bed, even if you want to. if this is really romantic, he'll want to "court" you (and you court him right back, y'hear????)) and he won't find it bad that you just say, "I'd like to, but I'd really like to know you a little better") And ignore the bozos on here who say "go for it." They know about as much about "romance" as a shark hunting its dinner. They can only advise you on how to get sex, not romance. Me, I'm old as the hills, and I know as much as anyone on here (and I'll arm wrestle anyone who thinks they know more about romance than me!)
Use your nervousness to appear humble, not to make yourself sound like you're a worthless bag of dirt, ok? No romantic guy likes that, I can promise you.
And remember, if you aren't ready to be seen with another guy in public without all that noise going on in your head? You ain't ready to date a guy. And skip the wingman, unless he brings one, too. that's like having your mom chaperone your date with a girl when you're 15. Highly immature and even more unattractive to be looking at the wingman as a sort of "Am I doing okay?" It'll take attention away from your date and if he's mature at all, he's going to see if for what it is: insecurity. And only if he's got a super, SUPER compassionate heart is he gonna say, "I understand. I was a little nervous, too, so I understand why you brought your friend along." But that's a rare guy who feels that way. Rarer than me. If a guy did that with me, it'd turn me off, even though I understood why the guy did it.
Mama birds push their babies out of the nest and say, "Fly on your own," and that baby had better fly on its own. Learn to do the same.
