The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    To register, turn off your VPN; you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

Need advice and explanations...

C

curiousnash28

Joined
Jul 27, 2013
Posts
6
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Nashville
Hey guys, I think I've only posted here once, but have lurked for a long time. I'm a 29 year old bi guy in Nashville. I really am bi. I love sex with women, but there's just something about sucking a nice cock. I'm also discrete, so my family nor my friends know about this.

Recently, I posted on CL saying that I was in the mood to suck. A straight guy answered saying he had always been curious and wanted to know if I was willing to help out a first timer. I said sure, but wanted to him to take his time and not rush into anything because he wouldn't enjoy it as much. (Backstory, this is opposite of my first time, when the other guy started kissing me and rubbing all over me, and I didn't stop him, and wasn't an enjoyable time.) So, we emailed back and forth for a few weeks, then we started texting. The texts and emails weren't sexual at all. Just some "hey, how was your week" or "big plans for the weekend" types.

Fast forward to a couple days ago, we were texting and he casually brings up a girl is coming to see him the next day and he tells me he had a threesome with her earlier this year. So, he initiated the sex talk. I let him lead the conversation too. I tell him that he is turning me on, and he says he is too. I said he could come over and hang out if he wanted to, but that because he was nervous we didn't have to do anything unless he wanted to. So he came over, and we just had small talk. I let him pick out some porn that he wanted, and he chose MMF bi porn. We weren't sitting beside each other, but we were rubbing. He asked to see mine, so I took my pants off, and he took his off (GREAT COCK AND HUGE SET OF BALLS BTW) and just jacked a little.

He moved over to sit beside me but I still didn't touch him or anything. He kept starting at my dick, so I did ask if he wanted to touch it. He was hesitant but he did and started jacking me. I asked if he wanted me to touch his, and he said sure. I then asked if he wanted to me to suck it. He did, so I did. He came in about five minutes, but said it was great, he was just nervous. I kept jacking off, and asked if he wanted to suck mine. He said he wasn't ready for that, to which I said that was fine and to trust his instincts. I came, and we cleaned up and he left about 20 minutes later.

Next morning, I texted him saying that I hope he wan't too freaked out about the night before. Crickets!!! I texted him later in the day, still got nothing. Texted him this morning, still nothing. Nothing sexual or referencing the other night at all.

Should I be offended by this? Should I take it personal? Should I have done something different? Even if we never did anything again, I would like to be friends with this guy because he is a genuinely nice guy, at least I thought he was. Has this ever happened to anyone else? I was just trying to help him out.

(sorry for the long post)
 
He'll contact you again when he's horny for male sex.
 
I don't want to be a booty call though. If we became friends, and he asked for a BJ now and then, that would be fine.
 
It sounds like he's still processing his own feelings. Give him a few days before taking it personal.
 
Let him reach out to you guy..he is in the "head" mode instead of the other head mode when he was with you
 
When you post to craigslist (or anywhere else, for that matter) be as specific as you can. Mention you're looking for a fwb type of thing and not necessarily a one-off hookup. And for a fwb type of thing, put out some of your hobbies or the things (sexual and non) you enjoy. Easier to match with others that way.

Edited to add - Try not to be stressed about him not texting you back. He's prolly still sorting through feelings and/or there's different relationship needs and a surprising number of people don't know how to discuss that.
 
I usually don't post on CL, I'm on Adam4Adam & AFF, but I just decided to. What got me was that we talked for probably a month before we even did anything, and rarely even talked about anything sexual. In my mind, we were developing a friendship of some sorts. If this had all happened in one night, I would completely understand not texting me back.

No one likes the feeling of rejection, and that's what I'm feeling. Apparently I'm also growing a vagina.
 
Lol, if you could grow a vagina half the trans people I know wouldn't need hormones. Men Don't Share/Have Intense Emotions is a pernicious and dangerous sexist stereotype, one I particularly loath since it doesn't help when you're dealing with personal emotional upheaval. I didn't know you talked for a month. Hrm. If I were you I wouldn't continue to text him, but I also wouldn't totally drop the idea of being fwb. He might text later - like a good month or two when he gets things sorted out, since it can take a while. Or he might not.

Either way though, you seem to have the right approach to finding a friend with benefits. I think if you keep it up odds are good you'll find someone. =)
 
Thanks for the advice! I'm not going to text or email him. It sucks, because he talked so much about how discrete he wanted to be, which is what I am to everyone I meet. What happens in my house stays at my house. I just want to know if it's me, or he just didn't like it. If its the later, that's fine. He tried something that he was curious about, and found out he didn't like it.

I'm just an honest person and hope to get honesty in return, even if it hurts.
 
Something similar has happened to many of us. Some straight guys are curious and want to try some things. They find someone they can get comfortable with and it takes them a while to let their guard down. They experience what they were looking for and then get this huge guilt trip and have to convince themselves they're straight. Contacting you again would mean he liked it and in his mind that's not acceptable. It's fucked up, rude and childish. He should have the balls (according to you he does but idk) to man up and talk to you. Even if it's too say "Hey it was fun but not what I was looking for" something. I hate the disappearing act. It's something a kid does. Not a grown man.

Don't worry dude. You didn't do anything wrong other than trust a spineless douche. Forget about him and when he reaches out again ignore him because he's going to flake again. Can almost guarantee it

Steven
 
Yeah, although he hasn't reciprocated yet, you certainly didn't do anything wrong. Still put yourself out there, there are good friends for you to make (and more). Sorry this didn't work out ideally for you, but better luck next time.
 
All good advice! I really do appreciate it all.

I guess it's time to move on to the next person. Anyone here in Nashville!? :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top