Not quite sure where I'm going with my love-life

[YourHolyFool]

It's an incredibly long story.
Basically, I'm a Freshmen in college and the first day I made friends with one of my hall-mates, who happens to be gay as well.
Long story short, he has a huge thing for me, but I do not for him.
In no way am I physically attracted to him, but he is a wonderful person. We've been friends since the first day, and we would go and do pretty much everything together.
I've spent more time away from him recently, since I've been seeing this one guy and needed time away from him. This, of course, offends him and he gets jealous and talks about how he just goes in his room and cries about the situation because he knows that I don't like him and I'm with another guy.

It's a very intricate story, which is way too much to type up on here. Honestly, if someone would be willing to just talk to me on Skype and possibly give me some advice, that would be absolutely fantastic. (And I really do mean just talk about my situation, I'm really in a rut here)

Just message me your Skype and I'll add you.
Thanks in advance everyone.

Edit: I just noticed how sketchy it looks that I just joined and I'm posting this. I just recently decided to stop being a lurker, haha.

 

[maxpowr9]

We have all been on either end of "unrequited love" at one point in our lives and it sucks. As for the jilted lover, it is up for them get over their crush. If they can't contain their feelings after you explicitly rejected their advances and told them "friends only", it is best to just end the friendship altogether [assuming no ulterior motives on your part].

I can already tell with your friend who cries over jealousy of you with another guy is that he is emotionally toxic and you are better off dumping even before the unrequited love. If he was a real friend, he would be happy or at worst "cynical" that you are with someone else and not brooding.

You're only a Freshmen in college so there is plenty of opportunity to meet new friends at school also.

 

[aaggii]

The Skype thing you say.. is there more you´re afraid to say in public?

You need to talk with your friend, make him realize you are FRIENDS, not lovers. If he gets upset over it - which he most probably will - you might want to take a few steps back from your friendship. He either is a cunt and will cut you off, either realize how stupid his situation is and will come back.

 

[bruce379]

He has a crush on you. Some of us have been there before on both sides of the situation at different times before and all I can say is that you need to tell him that you want to keep him as your friend but you're in a relationship with another guy.

 

[Rolyo85]

Ok, a bit of tough love now.

Having a friend who is crushing on you is a very heady experience. Some of us have been there, and yes - it feels really good to have someone pining over you. Question is - do you actually encourage him? And no, this is not a question you need to answer here, but you have to answer it to yourself.

If not, why are you being friends with him? It is hurting him, and it must be inconvenient to you, knowing how he feels. It is both merciful and way more appropriate to distance yourself from him. Whether he is toxic or not, I don't think we can say, because you haven't provided much detail, but in general when one is just your friend, they don't get to be jealous, and if they feel that way, they should keep it to themselves. What does he think, that he will guilt-trip you into getting with him?

 

[AstareGod]

You didn't mention whether or not your friendship with the first guy went anywhere beyond platonic. If it had, I can understand his feelings of jealousy. If it hadn't, perhaps he's either harboring romantic feelings for you, or is simply jealous of the time you're devoting to the second guy.

In either case, as maxpowr9 said, we all go through experiences of unrequited love, and it truly does suck. I've been in situations where things have been running smoothly, and all of a sudden the rug has been pulled from under my feet, and I'm left with only myself to pick up the pieces. And sometimes we have to be the ones to pull the rug when we see others get in over their head and we know it's not meant to be. Things just don't work out sometimes, and sometimes it's best to make a clean break and let the other person reestablish himself.

You are a college Freshmen, and you're 18. I assume the first guy is, too. You both have long lives ahead of you, and lots to still figure out about yourselves and this whole love thing. Don't try to figure it out all at once.

Keep us posted.

 

[Seasoned]

This could be a matter of living with the consequence of "doing what you want to do and not doing what you don't want to do." His stuff is his stuff and only he can fix it.