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Not sure how to pursue something with this guy...

Hotswimguy82

Hotswimguy82

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I attend a university, and last week was the first week of classes. I wanted to do an extra-curricular this year, so I auditioned for a music group last week. The group held an informational meeting the day before auditions, and there was a very attractive guy in the group whom I couldn’t take my eyes off. After the meeting, I was chatting with one of the other group members, when this guy comes up to me and we start chatting about various things. We seemed to hit it off, which really surprised and pleased me.

After some research, I found out that he was gay, which is obviously a good thing. The auditions lasted a few days, and throughout the process we talked occasionally and even had a solid conversation about internships at a mid-week party. At the same party, at one point he put his hand on my shoulder and left it there for a few seconds. My heart soared.

Sadly, I didn’t get into the group, which really discourages me because now I’m not really going to have the opportunity to be around him and get to know him first as a friend. I did add him on Facebook earlier this week and he accepted, but we haven’t had any sort of communication since auditions.

For me, he is just an absolute diamond in the rough. I have never met a guy like this that embodied everything I was looking for. Very sweet, goofy, FUNNY, outgoing, driven, masculine, and ridiculously attractive. I was planning on going to the group’s concerts and maybe chatting with him afterward, but that is so far from now and seems like too little, too late. I just feel like there was so much potential, but now I’m not sure where to go from here now that our only connection is Facebook.
 
Why not invite him out for coffee or something? Start building a friendship. You don't have to be in that group to do so.
 
Does this guy have an email address or a phone number? I don't think the window of interest has closed. You could always message him on FB if you see him online.

I would try and stay in contact and definitely ask him out to do something.
 
What the other guys said. And contact the group's director to thank him for the audition opportunity and to get his opinion as to whether practice would get you into the group. Ask this guy out soon.
 
You sound exactly like me, the door is staring there right at your face but you can't see it because you like the guy... but if this were any other cool person you wanted to kick it with, what would you do?

I don't know... hit him up on Facebook and say suggest you guys kick it some time.
 
I sent him a message on Facebook earlier this evening asking him if he'd like to go out for coffee at some point next week, and I gave him my phone number at the end of the message in case he wanted to call or text (I really hate doing things like this over Facebook; I'd rather get to the phone stage quickly). Still awaiting his response.
 
Hotswimguy82 said:
I sent him a message on Facebook earlier this evening asking him if he'd like to go out for coffee at some point next week, and I gave him my phone number at the end of the message in case he wanted to call or text (I really hate doing things like this over Facebook; I'd rather get to the phone stage quickly). Still awaiting his response.
Click to expand...

Atta' boy! You take that initiative!
 
It's been 54 hours without a reply, and I'm starting to get very anxious and somewhat sad. At what point should I assume that he isn't going to reply? My friends have suggested that he still might not be sure about how exactly to proceed, or that he is maybe just being lazy about replying, but I really don't know. Do you guys think that a 2+ day delay is reasonable?
 
Would have to depend on how often he uses Facebook... Some of my friends logs on once a week or even longer. You can check his wall to see if he's had any recent activities :P.
 
Yeah, he's been online off and on throughout the weekend. My friends all assured me that the message itself wasn't creepy, and that since I had actually interacted with him in person a good bit, it shouldn't have come across as weird.
 
Well the ball is in his court. It's up to him. Don't feel bad if he doesn't respond. At least you tried. :)
 
Well, one thing you may not know for sure is whether he's single.

If he hasn't answered, don't give it much thought. He has your number. If he wants to (and assuming he has time), he'll contact you.

And if he doesn't have the social grace to acknowledge your message, well then... it's probably just as well that you not waste any more time worrying about it.
 
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