Not sure if I'm gay/bi...

[pheonixdude]

Hi. I'm not sure if I'm bi or not. See, there's this guy who I go to school with, and randomly I found myself thinking he's hot. But I know that I like this other girl. Then one night I was thinking about him and I ended off jacking off to the thought of him. BUT I LIKE GIRLS!!!! What the hell is happening to me?

 

[Seasoned]

Welcome to JUB. Nothing is happening to you. You are becoming aware of your true sexual desires. Listen and you will learn.

 

[DaddyBadger]

Why be so eager to give yourself a label? Bi? Gay? Straight? You are who you are. . .

So, you randomly found yourself thinking that you find a dude hot, but you like girls. There's nothing wrong with that. It isn't like there's some kind of a deadline to decide once and for all time which gender you are most attracted to.

There's nothing more happening to you than plain old curiousity. You've definitely come to the right place to read about and discuss these things with others who are and have been in the same situation.

I hope that I've been of some help. Welcome to JustUsBoys.

 

[Achilleus]

There is nothing whatsoever wrong with being attracted to guys.

 

[pheonixdude]

thanks. So i should just give it time? I mean, there's only one actual girl i like. Plus i prefer gay porn to straight porn.

 

[movieguy22]

I was in the same boat you're in not too long ago. I had always been interested in solely girls until about grade 11, when I started noticing the guys around me as well. Honestly, it scared me because I thought no one would accept me for having these feelings for guys as well as girls.

And I, like you, have a tendency to look at gay porn more than straight porn, simply due to how I seem to view the two genders. I want a relationship, a serious relationship with a woman, which eventually leads to sex and so forth. When it comes to men, I see them more as objects. To paraphrase Casino Royale: I see men as disposable pleasures (there are some exceptions) and women as meaningful pursuits.

I guess what I'm saying is you're not the only one who found themselves in this position. All took for me was a matter of time really, and surrounding myself with some great friends. Friends who let you be who you want to be.

And, as others have said, Welcome to JUB!

 

[G-Lexington]

Nearly all of us assumed we'd be straight growing up. But then we found ourselves liking guys. We gave it a go, it stuck, and here we are.

Then signs are pointing to "gay". Right now, anyway. Just let it ride. Enjoy the view of the guy, feel free to think of guys where you jerk off, enjoy the gay porn. Chances are it'll start seeming more normal as time goes on.

Lex

 

[pheonixdude]

well, like, i understand this and all, but... changing the subject, my grandma and grandpa are the most homophobic creatures on the planet. They told me that if I was ever gay, they would disown me. Thanks for all of your advice. I really feel accepted by you guys.
Thanks,
Pheonix

 

[G-Lexington]

Some parents (and grandparents) pull that routine in the hopes that it'll "scare the gay out of them". Which is like trying to scare the left-handed out of you - it don't work. Pulling a stunt like that doesn't make a gay guy straight - it makes him gay and scared.

Your grandparents don't want to know you're gay. Fine. Don't tell them.

Lex

 

[rareboy]

my grandma and grandpa are the most homophobic creatures on the planet. They told me that if I was ever gay, they would disown me.

If they are leaving you shitloads of money....like tens of millions....and they aren't likely to live long, I'd shut up about being a homo.

But otherwise, call their bluff. They are putting conditions on their love and frankly, why would you even give a rat's ass if gramma has a heart attack when you tell her you like the taste of cock?

As soon as parents or grandparents set conditions on their support and love, it changes all the rules. Remember. They don't fucking own you.

And if you live your life being afraid of their disapproval for something as natural as air, then you are going to sacrifice all your happiness to their ugliness and meanness.

So tell 'em to go fuck themselves. For that and the five bucks in a greeting card they thought was good Christmas present.

 

[Atrocity]

Well the best thing for you to do at the moment is to not even think of other peoples oppinions about you being gay or not.
No one has to know what you think or what porn you like best now, so just go where the ride takes you. If you feel like looking at gay porn, look at it! If you see a hot guy, look at him! And if you eventually find it isnt your thing no one will know. So dont rush it, enjoy the ride, and your true sexual feelings will eventually come out

 

[js334433]

I agree with Atrocity here. I was in the same boat in high school and middle school. I am a curious person by nature and I was extremely curios back then about sex. So, I did research and found that I was interested in having sex with both guys and girls. Throughout high school, I worried about this because of different people's opinions. Since I've been in college, I've realized that I'm bi. I thank that realization to time and to friends. Plus, I have an awesome girlfriend who understands me for who I am. As some people on here have been saying, it'll take time to figure things out. Be yourself and surround yourself with people who will support you for who you are. Sorry for the rant. This is one of those things I care about.