Oh God, I think my Mum knows.

[JarodA]

Today I did something really stupid. She's left church for ages now but sort of in my eyes held on to some homophobic tendencies (she can't see anything to with gay on television without making some remark). I foolishly said that I might want to leave church for good, due to a "personal issue". God I'm stupid. Anyway, she's fished it out of me. I didn't tell her outright but she asked if I was leaving due to something to do with my sex life and basically I freaked out and left the room, and as I was leaving she said "It's alright, I think I know what it is now". Anyway, I escaped down to the laundry to play piano for a while, and when I came back up I realized that it might not be so bad after all. I seriously would've expected her to freak out about it but she seems pretty chilled.

Only, what should I do from here? I'm 98% sure that she knows now, but I doubt she'll bring it up again unless I do because she thinks it's too awkward for me (well, it is actually). So, should I bring it up again and just confirm that she knows what I think she knows already? It would clear the air.

Oh God, I really didn't expect this to happen so soon. I never expected to come out to her at all in the near future. I don't know how to react right now but thankfully she's off to work now so I won't have to see her till tomorrow morning.

 

[blogthissucker]

she could be referring to a whole bunch of things, depending on what kind of church we're talking about.

i.e. if your catholic, sex for anything but procreation is bad (i think)
and usually sex before marriage is frowned upon by all of them (officially)
and i think a lot of them don't like masturbation
the rule of thumb seems to be anything in which there is no possibility of a sperm reaching an egg is bad.

so... she might be thinking that you're sexually active (with girls), or that you masturbate or something... That would be something awkward enough for her that she wouldn't bring it up.

SO unless you can't go living in suspense, i suggest you just let it be. If it really bugs her she'll bring it up. And if she brings it up but you don't want to talk about it, just say so... I'm pretty sure any mom would be satisfied with an "I don't really want to talk about it, but don't worry, I'm safe."

 

[blogthissucker]

I made a joke and then decided it wasn't funny. Apologies.

 

[JarodA]

She's not Catholic so masturbation is a long-shot, and she knows I'm not sexually active.

 

[blogthissucker]

hm... well then it seems you're pretty open with her about everything. maybe it's not such a bad idea to discuss it with her...? i'm not an expert. just don't jump into a discussion that you're not ready for.

 

[trawler69]

Sounds like she knows but she is being cool with it, She would probably appreciate your meeting her halfway and talking about it. you are lucky to have such an laid back and accepting Mom. Appreciate her and let her know that you do, please!

 

[KaraBulut]

So... what if...

What if you tell her? What do you think will happen?

 

[JarodA]

Kia Ora fellow Kiwi,
It looks to me like this statement from your mum "It's alright, I think I know what it is now" is an invitation to you to discuss it more. She's saying, its alright. It probably took her courage to bring the topic up and now she's wondering what to do next. Do you think you could ask her what she meant by that statement ?

Might just do that. I'm a little nervous as well.

 

[backpacker]

I would say she opened the closet door for you and is now waiting for you to come out. Since she already said it's alright, I would expect her to be accepting. Doesn't sound like you have to much to lose by telling and probably a lot to gain.