Please help - Am I: Gay Straight or Bi?

[cumisgood]

Ok. So I am 18, male. I have not had much experience with either men or women.

I have fucked what used to be my girlfriend a couple times once inside and once outside the relationship. I really enjoyed being inside a warm pussy, but never ate it out in the fear of what it would taste like.

I have also had a little bit of experience with men. I have gave on of my friends a some what of a blow job in about 6th grade. In my sophmore year or highschool I gave my neighbor which used to be a friend of mine head a couple times which was good. (Nice big cock. I think so anyways) I have also gone all the way and back with my brother. Not proud of it, but it happens I guess.

I am not a big fan of anal, hurts to much but I have been told that it feels relaxing as you get used to it, which with dildos feels AMAZING! I love the feeling of being inside a nice tight asshole too.

I am not a big fan of natural guys. I don t like anal hair or public hair. Trimming is alright =) I am more into dudes that are muscular and shaven or just plain no body hair. Thick stubble (not long more like a 5 o'clock shadow) turns me on along with dark leg hair, arm hair, pit hair and sex feet. Im not into overweight which it seems I kind of am myself. Maybe not, but im not fit =(

I love looking at porn both men and women. Im usually only interested in women either if their fucking hot or if there is a cock inside them. Although I love to see real women naked (remember fucked my girlfriend). I like gay porn too. Like I have said muscles turn me on! Im not much into head but a nice body and cock will do me good. I like it =) Last week was the first time I have swallowed cum. It actually was alright. I had tried before but it made me want to gag.

I have many times caught myself staring at dudes in the school thinking of how AMAZING it would be to get down those gm shorts and show them how I could drive their cock crazy or wanted to make love to their chistled muscles! I love their hard nipples, their buffed pecs and their toned abs! It turns me on. I also seem to be into older guys when it comes to porn as long as they are fit. A little body hair maybe trimmed is kinky, but I love their thick mushroom head cocks. I also Am turned on by women of any ages really. But I do like the pussy trimmed or shaved. No naturals for me.

I also get these CRAZY incest fantasies about two of my older step brothers. One who is married with a kid, the other dating. They turn me on so bad and jokingly talk about "Well if you don't do this your going to be giving me a blowjob!" or "If you don't pay me that money you owe me soon you'll be giving me some head!" TO bad the are always kidding or I would really say "Alright then whip that thing out!"

The hole thing of being bi sexual or gay seems wrong to me. I am a Christian which is hard to believe with all of the sin that I live in. Basically, I want to know your opinion. I have only admitted these things to very few people. Only one person knows about my incest relationship and I am just so CONFUSED!

What do you think? Am I Gay, Straight, or Bi? Leave answers and comments/suggestions. All will be appreciated =)

Thanks - Confused

 

[vaboy90]

Well from what I read it sounds to me like your Bi. Your very turned on by both sexes and got me turned on too just reading your post . If you don't know which one you prefer over the other the only thing to do is keep trying both until you find that you enjoy being with either a man or woman more. You may end up finding that you enjoy both and that's OK too. You'll have to iron out the religion stuff on your own. I'm a christian too and I still enjoy all the stuff you mentioned with a guy. I've haven't done anal yet but I know I want to. Good luck!!

 

[Phantomfrk]

For some people its not about like women or men its certain attributes that attract you to different people... To me it sounds like you are attracted to (1) Muscles which is probably why you get turned on when you see a man fucking a women *the dick is a pretty big muscle!* (2) Bear skin which explains why you were able to have sex with you ex girlfriend and (3) Adventure that's probably why you are attracted to your brothers becuase you grew up in a Christan home and have been told that both incest and gay love is wrong.

Basically all this means is that you are bi *that is if you want to label your sexuality* becuase being bi doesn't really mean you are attracted to men and women it can also mean that you are attracted to the human species as a whole... but if you start getting turned on by your dog we may have to talk some more

 

[cumisgood]

HA HA that dog thing is a little awkward... But thanks for the advice so far dudes.

 

[Fucker29]

Why do you even consider being straight to be part of the equation? Dude, if you're attracted to guys you're at least Bi, wich sounds like that's what you are. But you're the one who have to come to terms with who you are. It can take quite a while before you come to terms with what you are and accept it.

Why do you equate being christian with homosexuality being wrong? UGH! Don't even get me started on that shit...I'm not a christian (thankfully) but it's just stupid and narrow minded to view things like that. And shut up about it being a sin and you're living in sin. Open your mind a lil' bit more, think outside the box or, in this case, outside the bible, the church or religion...think of yourself as human being...yeah, just that...you're fine as you are.

 

[seven_sins]

Who do you fantasize about when you masturbate? If it is exclusively guys, you are gay. If it is exclusively gals, you are straight. If it is sometimes guys and at other times gals, you are bi.

 

[KaraBulut]

What do you think? Am I Gay, Straight, or Bi?

Uncertain but what is certain is that you have a lot of fetishes and fantasies.

You're looking at sexuality as if it is a multiple choice question where you have to specify
A) Gay,
B) Straight or
C) Bisexual.

Human sexuality isn't that clear cut and there's a limited amount of real choices that can be made. Enjoy what you are and stop trying to affix a label to it.

 

[cumisgood]

Thanks again for the comments, although not fond of "Fucker29";s at all! I often masturbate over guys but girls often also. Um...what else. Yes I do believe that homosexuality is a sin. But as I have said I am living in sin by doing it which is wrong but I cant help the temptation. I want to get over it but at the same time I like it. Which is what Satan wants. Us to LOVE being in sin.

 

[Fucker29]

Thanks again for the comments, although not fond of "Fucker29";s at all! I often masturbate over guys but girls often also. Um...what else. Yes I do believe that homosexuality is a sin. But as I have said I am living in sin by doing it which is wrong but I cant help the temptation. I want to get over it but at the same time I like it. Which is what Satan wants. Us to LOVE being in sin.

Then quite frankly, I pity you. You're not fond of my post perhaps because I was brutally honest with you, that's how I roll, specially when I read certain things, I just can't and won't shut up. I told you like it is. If you want a magical solution, it won't happen...you won't get rid of it, it's who you are. If you think it's a sin, then you're not accepting yourself and, by your narrow perspective, you're a sin. Isn't God supposed to love us all? Isn't God amazingly forgiving? Isn't God the one who made you the way you are? Isn't that his will? Doesn't God work in mysterious ways? Then, if you're a Christian as you say you are, and not another so called christian who twists the words in the bible, you'll accept God's will, therefore, accept yourself.
Also, you're thinking in absolutes and that's one of christian people's MAJOR flaws and hypocrisis. No one's perfect, in order to live you do both wrong things and right things. Everyone's flawed but you're saying that if you're not 100% good, then you're giving into Satan's will. Stop seeing things in black and white, there's shades of grey in between and many other colors.

If you don't, you'll live a miserable life of constant denial and that's sad. Sorry but I'm not gonna sugarcoat it for you. It's reality. My advise is to try to be more open minded about things, people and about life in general. Learn to put question marks in everything because nothing's 100% certain. Basically, question your faith, revise it...perhaps you'll be more free.

 

[conrad]

It seems to me that you have been sexually active for the thrill of it. Don't misunderstand me, the sex that I go for is beyond thrilling; it is transforming.

I find it hard to believe that you are so into "out of bounds" sex. In our society men treat their sisters and brothers differently because they are , sexually speaking, out of bounds.

It seems to me that you are neglecting that which is the firmest foundation for truly meaningful sex. I refer, of course, the an area of relationship which you seem to skip over too lightly. Sexual attraction is something that appeals to our natural horniness. It's there for Christians and non-Christians and it's there for those who have few partners in life and those who have many. BUT, if you allow yourself to be guided by those urges, which we share with the animals, your life may be filled with orgasms aplenty but they will not likely reach the level of what we call love. Those who simply use others for their own pleasure are hardly partners who will remain attractive to the person being treated as an object.

Maybe you have not consulted the teachings of the right set of folks who call themselves Christian. There are many Christians who hold to the basic principles of the faith even where sex is concerned. For instance, some persons find that persons of the same sex as theirs are sexually attractive. They become friends, they become more than friends and the next thing may be that they will express their love for each other sexually. Is this love of lesser value than the love expressed sexually between a man and a woman?

I presume you know the great commandment as Jesus put it: to love God with heart, soul, and mind. And you know he adds a second: to love others as one loves oneself. The prophet Micah hears God declaring that the good consists in doing justice, loving kindness, and walking humbly with your God. Or we might put that as : be fair, be kind, and conduct yourself in all things knowing that you could be wrong because you are human; you are not God. Keep it simple. But let your mind go to work on the problem you have made for yourself. Irresponsible use of one's sexuality whether one be gay, straight, or bi is a misuse of a gift from our Creator. My mind tells me that sex which is an expression of the love of two persons for each other in the bond of a loving and caring relationship is closer to what God intends for our use of our sexuality than those warnings that carry the punishment of Hell. Right now you are in a hell of a mess of your own making from which you can still free youself. I suspect even most persons who claim no faith at all would agree that you somehow have to shape up. It isn't really that complicated

Learn to be a friend to both men and women. Relationships are what makes it possible for us to reach beyond ourselves and our selfish interests. Yet, the miracle in loving relationship is that in such relationships the parties are both enriched. People do make mistakes, but as Christians we rely on the loving kindness of God who promises forgiveness and our proper response is with God's help to "shape up and live right," And the call and the promise are addressed to you right where you are. You don't have to worry about whether you are gay or bi or straight.

And do seek out some Christian group who are alive to the reality of God's good news for your life and mine. My best wishes go with you in this.

 

[cumisgood]

Thanks Conrad for that well written advice. And Fucker29 once again I am posting about you =) I was upset at the way you first had written the 1st comment. The second was better =) I still do not agree with some things but that is yours and my differences and everyone is entitled to their own opinion so... Thanks.

 

[probeteam1]

Well, cumisgood, here's a simple (if less than nuanced) answer for you:
I'd normally include a comment here about how labels are only there for convenience, but you seem to be looking for some definition here, so I'll give you what I've got:
You've had sex with guys, you enjoyed it, and you have the desire to do it again.
I'd say you're not straight.

Your Christianity has nothing to do with your sexuality.
What's more being gay (or bisexual, which is where I'd say you fit) is not a sin, any more than heterosexuality is. Strictly speaking, all of the sex you've had so far is sinful, since you haven't mentioned anything about being married (adultery's a big one, after all). At worst, attraction to men represents another temptation to sin (personally, I don't even believe that, but it's not my beliefs that are at issue here). Likewise, getting off to gay porn is no more sinful than getting off to straight porn, unless the thought "I'd like to marry that woman" routinely passes through your mind.

So no matter how wrong it feels, I'd say that's the label you're stuck with. But the trick to not "living in sin" isn't to renounce your attraction to men - it's to control your libido. If you manage to limit all future dalliances to women, you're still not living sin-free. The alternative, I think, is to accept that, even if it's wrong, it's a part of who you are, and then decide what to do about it.

Personally, however, my opinions are much closer to conrad's.

 

[cumisgood]

Thanks for the tips =)

 

[Willie Boy]

Maybe you are just overly stimulated sexually. You know, you are 18, with your hormones raging out of control. Doen't be in such a hurry to try to label yourself, they're just words. I would say just be patient and give your body time to figure itself out. Based on the information you gave, I would say you seem to be leaning toward the bisexual area. But then again, in your horny state, you just might be tri (as in up to trying almost anything).

Again, give yourself some time. You'll be fine.

 

[Lube]

You have 2 sentences about women.

And paragraphs and paragraphs about men. You may be bi, but you certainly lean towards men. I'd call you gay. So what?

It doesn't matter what you want to be. A black man can want to be white, but he'll never be (Michael Jackson notwithstanding). A gay man can want to be straight, but he never will be.

A black man who accepts himself for what he is and is proud of that, despite what the white majority may think, is a healthier, happier person. Likewise, a gay man who accepts and is proud of his gayness is an emotional healthier and happier person.

Be who you are. Don't hide from it.

It will never go away.

No matter how much you pretend.

Been there. Done that. It ain't pretty.

 

[cumisgood]

Thanks for all the tips dudes.

 

[conrad]

After all these posts, dear friend, I hope you are realizing that whichever way you turn you are going to be going against some other person's notion of what is proper.

Get over it, we all have to live the life with what we have been given. Your sexuality will remain complex for you until you develop some genuine relationship in which that all can be clarified. But, you are not on a shopping tour, you need interaction with a real person or persons. Forget about the momentary thrills that sex provides; you can get that kind of satifaction and release in the privacy of your bedroom (or bathroom) where you can beat off to the fantasy which grips you at the moment. And, don't ignore what is happening in your mind and body when you are pleasing yourself with you own hand; it may very well tell you what leads to follow and what leads to ignore in your interaction with other persons.

Love is not a thing to be despised whether that love be between a man and a woman or between two men. Much of the garbage which has been fed the young over countless generations can be disposed of when one is in a loving relationship. We learn best by doing.

Are you still afraid of what others threaten you with? If you listen to them too much you will be hung up in matters relating to your very own sexuality forever. I am by no means a hedonist in matters as important to me as my sex life; I have known real love on both sides of my sexuality. No one will ever convince me that the love I shared with men or with women outside of marriage was in some way not love. In my humble opinion, and based on my own experiences, I think you would be well-advised to avoid casual sex, avoid the very notion of indiscriminate experimentation, and don't ever cheat on a partner when you are in a loving relationship.

Take charge of your life. Life does serve up some nice and unexpected surprises along the way so be prepared to grab hold. There is no way you can avoid sin; none of us is that pure. So, rather than let life pass you by, SIN BRAVELY!!! And, you could do something good for those who delight in warning you against what your very being tells you is right for you and your partner; let's face it, you are horny and you admit it. Tell those dear folks that your are going to do what your best judgment tells you is right knowing that where you may fall short and sin you will rest in knowing that there is what they and you must depend on in the end. the forgiveness of sins.