Serious Question Regarding Coming Out To Straight Friends

[G-Lexington]

I came out to my straight friends because I wanted them to know. And I wanted their support and encouragement. And that's what I got. I can post the details if you're really interested, but it doesn't make for much of a thread.

Lex

 

[justright25]

And you think the guy you describe has gay friends, closeted or not?

I think he'd be much more likely to have lesbian friends than gay ones. He'd have a lot more in common with them.

Lube,
You seem to be using stereotypes to define what people are interested in. There are things that I share in common with female friends and there are things I share with male friends but there are no set or defined limits. I typically like reading your opinions but I have to differ with you on this.

 

[3nipples]

........

Conclusion: No, i'm not making fun of anyone. I realize that we can't help who we fall in love with, but maybe people just aren't exactly as homophobic as you might think? ()/ Do you have any experiences of coming out to straight men and maintaining a friendship with them without sex getting in the way?

My two closest friends are straight and I don't have a problem with their being straight and they don't have a problem with me being gay. The main difference after my coming out to them is that they express more physical affection than they ever did before they knew.

 

[Lube]

Lube,
You seem to be using stereotypes to define what people are interested in. There are things that I share in common with female friends and there are things I share with male friends but there are no set or defined limits. I typically like reading your opinions but I have to differ with you on this.

Thanks, justright25.

Note, though, that I didn't say "he does have..."; I said "he's more likely to...".

Sure, you (and I) share things in common with male friends and female friends, but we're more likely to share interests with other gay men (closeted or not) and straight females. Of course, we also share coming-out and discrimination experiences (and, I think, a 'creative' bug) with lesbians; and we share sex drive and testosterone-influenced things with straight men.

But overall, on average, we tend to share more with straight women and gay guys. Because, well, we're not straight men.

 

[Lube]

"If we spent less time wondering what others thought of us we'd realize how much they don't."

I agree with this in terms of coming out. We dream up this big internal conflict about coming out, and it's usually not a big deal.

But, the closer someone is to you (relationship-wise), the less I think that statement is true. I certainly do worry about people I care deeply about.