wilehart1978
JUB Addict
I see alot of stuff on JUB about guys coming out...For guys who are already out...describe how you felt (i.e the feelings that ran through your mind) after having had sex with a guy for the first time....
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Sex with a guy for the first time
- Thread starter wilehart1978
- Start date
I had the same, only I was receiving. It wasn't amazing, but he also didn't know what he was doing either. Then I thought "I don't know what these guys are talking about asses hurting afterwards." Later I was so sore I didn't want to move.
But after that it never hurt again.
But after that it never hurt again.
drhladnjak
JUB Addict
I really enjoyed my first time. It was with a friend of a friend who was visiting for a couple of days from out of town. So he wasn't a total stranger, but it's not like I knew the guy all that well myself. Obviously, we both knew from the outset that it was just for fun, so there weren't any awkward expections of anything else developing. I'd definitely had sexual experiences before (groping on dance floors, a guy briefly going down on me at the patio of a bar and some other dubious shit), but this time was the one I consider my real first. It was kissing, oral (giving and receiving), lots of body contact and I spent the rest of the night cuddled up with him in his bed.
I suppose I felt a number of things afterwards. First of all, I felt a huge validation of my sexuality. Being gay up until that point had always been somewhat theoretical, even though I had been out to pretty much everybody (all friends, co-workers, most family) for a year at that point. Getting physical with a hot, nice guy and enjoying it felt like the final step in coming to terms with being gay. I also felt like a burden of nervousness, discomfort at still being a virgin (at age 26) and general sexual frustration had been lifted. I felt like I could stop worrying so much about those sort of things and just finally get on with my life.
I suppose I felt a number of things afterwards. First of all, I felt a huge validation of my sexuality. Being gay up until that point had always been somewhat theoretical, even though I had been out to pretty much everybody (all friends, co-workers, most family) for a year at that point. Getting physical with a hot, nice guy and enjoying it felt like the final step in coming to terms with being gay. I also felt like a burden of nervousness, discomfort at still being a virgin (at age 26) and general sexual frustration had been lifted. I felt like I could stop worrying so much about those sort of things and just finally get on with my life.
breatheH20
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Lol, I'm always overdramatic about stuff. I was right afterwards, I was like "I'm a dirty slut, whore.. I gave it up that easy." haha, then afterwards I was fine, had some laughs about it with some friends and stuff. It was one of my better sexual encounters.
JackFTwist
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The first two times I was so repressed and in denial that while I enjoyed the sex I chalked it up to being drunk and I buried the memory and the meaning of it and still thought of myself as totally straight, which allowed me to get married with integrity.
The third time, like 11 years later, the sex wasn't so hot but I knew that I all the denial and burying of feelings was gone, totally gone, and I was gay and that was that. I never pretended I was bi - I knew where it was at for me. It was at a point where I was ready for the truth, and that guy and I fell in love quickly and while he is history now, we had a 20 year run, he remains the love of my life, for better or worse.
The third time, like 11 years later, the sex wasn't so hot but I knew that I all the denial and burying of feelings was gone, totally gone, and I was gay and that was that. I never pretended I was bi - I knew where it was at for me. It was at a point where I was ready for the truth, and that guy and I fell in love quickly and while he is history now, we had a 20 year run, he remains the love of my life, for better or worse.
CagedBird
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](/images/smilies/bang.gif "Brick wall ](*,)")
My first time was with a guy friend I knew for a wile.
I was 21 and did him, I ALWAYS felt my 1st time would be with a girl up till then, it sealed the deal, I was gay....
It was ok, kinda "thats it?" but it got WAY better with practice over the years
~Chris
I was 21 and did him, I ALWAYS felt my 1st time would be with a girl up till then, it sealed the deal, I was gay....
It was ok, kinda "thats it?" but it got WAY better with practice over the years
~Chris
It was long,long, ago, but still so sweet in memory. It's the story of a developing friendship over a period of two years. We were normal fifteen year olds; he was new to our town and high school and we met on our bikes going out to the park for a swim. We clicked; iffering in so many ways, yet somehow we bonded. We don't see each other often these days; but, when we do and when we are alone we never fail to remember those glorious times.
For two years we accompanied and enjoyed each other so completely that in the process we became aware of a side of our sexuality that we had hardly even ever thought about. The terms were familiar: homo, fag, fairy, cocksucker, blow job. We knew who had "knocked up" who, we even knew where condoms could be bought without everyone knowing of it. Sex was for marriage and wasn't discussed in polite company. We survived that.
It was all so natural and so wonderful. I remember the first time we hugged. then hugs became deep embraces and we were acutely aware of the hardness below which we acknowledged to each first with laughs and then with touching. The first kiss was short followed a few days later by sloppy exploratory intensity and harder hard ons. Over the course of a few months we had "come out" to each other and we were amazed at how wonderful it could be.
By Christmas we had become experts at felatio and devotees of "69". And, we were able to be alone. I had brothers and sisters to spare; he was an omly child and his parents worked days. The sex was our way of confirming our bonding and our bonding made the sexual experience more intense.
Even our language changed. We made love; we didn't just have sex. Having to keep it all personal and private was necessary but emotionally difficult. We felt
very alone: we were cetainly unaware of any other homosexual activity among our peers. We could not talk about it all with anyone. We survived that too.
Our society still doesn't assist genuine male-male bonding and those of us who have experienced it can't really promote it. My first lover and I are deeply closeted, but if folks knew our story they would probably hail us for being successful in switching from homosexual to heterosexual living. But that is so false. Few, if any men are 100% gay or 100% straight; we all have that "other side" and it's most often repressed. And that is sad.
We are, I think, well-adjusted, happily married men who have experienced and enjoyed the full range of our sexual complexity. We hope our children have been able to do likewise; we think we've been better fathers and husbands because we have dared to love then and now.
I hope no one will think that I am trying to divert this thread; I'm not. I find the responses fascinating. I "came out" to my high school lover, but he also "came
out" to me. My mind is my own and that is where I am free to see myself as a whole person who has loved and been loved in return.
Peace!
For two years we accompanied and enjoyed each other so completely that in the process we became aware of a side of our sexuality that we had hardly even ever thought about. The terms were familiar: homo, fag, fairy, cocksucker, blow job. We knew who had "knocked up" who, we even knew where condoms could be bought without everyone knowing of it. Sex was for marriage and wasn't discussed in polite company. We survived that.
It was all so natural and so wonderful. I remember the first time we hugged. then hugs became deep embraces and we were acutely aware of the hardness below which we acknowledged to each first with laughs and then with touching. The first kiss was short followed a few days later by sloppy exploratory intensity and harder hard ons. Over the course of a few months we had "come out" to each other and we were amazed at how wonderful it could be.
By Christmas we had become experts at felatio and devotees of "69". And, we were able to be alone. I had brothers and sisters to spare; he was an omly child and his parents worked days. The sex was our way of confirming our bonding and our bonding made the sexual experience more intense.
Even our language changed. We made love; we didn't just have sex. Having to keep it all personal and private was necessary but emotionally difficult. We felt
very alone: we were cetainly unaware of any other homosexual activity among our peers. We could not talk about it all with anyone. We survived that too.
Our society still doesn't assist genuine male-male bonding and those of us who have experienced it can't really promote it. My first lover and I are deeply closeted, but if folks knew our story they would probably hail us for being successful in switching from homosexual to heterosexual living. But that is so false. Few, if any men are 100% gay or 100% straight; we all have that "other side" and it's most often repressed. And that is sad.
We are, I think, well-adjusted, happily married men who have experienced and enjoyed the full range of our sexual complexity. We hope our children have been able to do likewise; we think we've been better fathers and husbands because we have dared to love then and now.
I hope no one will think that I am trying to divert this thread; I'm not. I find the responses fascinating. I "came out" to my high school lover, but he also "came
out" to me. My mind is my own and that is where I am free to see myself as a whole person who has loved and been loved in return.
Peace!
musicjunkie_87
On the Prowl
the first time i was about 11-12 and the guy was about 14-15, he was my neighbor and he were best friends for years and one day we just started messing around, for about a year it was just blowjobs and hand jobs then one day he said he wanted to actually have sex, we did it, and it was nothing amazing, it hurt and after i went home i did cry. i just felt like if anyone in my family found out it would just rip the family apart. we kept it a secret for years (6) i told my friend just recently... but yeah that was my first time...
tony
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A few of my different "firsts"...
I my first time ever fooling around in any extent with another guy was around 2.5 years ago when I was 23. My feelings of attraction to men had only surfaced a few months prior and while I thought it may be a phase, the feelings weren't going away so I decided that it was best while young and single to experiment a bit, rather than finding myself older and married to a woman with this bit of regret and curiosity in my head about being with another man (cheating is not an option for me), so I gave myself permission to explore a bit. After a few months of misfires and a lot of uncertainty and confusion about how to even go about doing such a thing, I met up with a man from craig's list for my first gay experience. I was more nervous than I could ever remember being. I was practically shaking. My stomach was queasy and I was just alternately petrified and excited. We met up, made out, felt each other up and gave each other head. It was my first time feeling another man's body, kissing another man or having a prolonged hug with one even. It was my first time seeing another man's dick. After it was over, knowing it was my first time, he asked me if I felt weird. I told him "strangely, no". I was really surprised that I wasn't as freaked out as I thought I'd be. After I left, it was very matter of fact. It did sort of feel odd though walking around that day, at the store or at home and just thinking that only a few hours ago, another man's dick was in my mouth. I felt relieved at having done it, at having finally after months of curiosity had this experience and at the time, thought I was done with it. My thirst had been quenched and my curiosity satisfied. Then however, I decided to meet up again with him, thinking that it would be a better experience the second time as my nerves would be far less. I did, and was again sort of satisfied for another few weeks before the desire came back again. Long story short, I'm still "experimenting", something that I thought back then would would be complete after one experience.
My first time having anal sex with another guy, as a top, was several months after the above experiences and with the same guy. In between my first hook-ups with him and this one, I had hooked up with I believe three other guys. Two of the experiences were horrible and I was sort of convinced that I was "off" men and really done, when another guy sort of fell into my lap and I found myself enjoying my time with him and my curiosity reignited. I got back in contact with the first guy and we met up. I'm not one to have anal sex with strangers; and not that he was a good friend or anything, but in having met up with him before, I felt a certain level of comfort with him. I decided that if I'm gonna really experiment with men, I should try anal sex and he was willing to be my first. I had never had anal sex with anyone, male or female before. I was sort of clueless as to what to do and I remember I actually came on here lurking and looking for tips beforehand. It was very basic when we got around to it. He slipped a condom and some lube on me and got on all fours and we did it doggystyle. As I was doing it, glancing down and seeing an ass, a man's ass bouncing up and down on my cock, I just couldn't quite believe that this was happening, that I was in this situation. When it was done with, he said he was impressed for an anal sex virgin that I lasted as long as I did. Looking back on it, I am too, since as i've posted in later threads, since then I've had a very difficult time getting hard enough to penetrate with anal sex. After this experience, I thought that I had reached sort of another level of "gayness" so to speak. This was no longer a one or two time "experiment". I had now been fooling around for months and had done so with a few guys and had now had anal sex with one. It became harder and harder to deny that this was just experimenting. To this day however, I have only had anal sex a handful of times, all with this same guy with me on top. We had a good long fuck buddy relationship but I'm pretty sure that's come to an end. I haven't had anal sex with him or anyone, with me on top, in well over a year.
My final "first" was my first time being a bottom. This happened only around two months ago. A different guy I had met on craig's list a few months before. We had met up a few times and got along really well in addition to being physically drawn to one another. Were circumstances different, I actually would've entertained the notion of dating him, something that I up until that point, had no interest in ever doing with another man. The bottoming was sort of spontaneous. He recommended it while we were in the middle of fooling around and I agreed. I was extremely nervous since his dick was so large and I had never had anything up my ass minus a finger, and even THAT hurt. He used a lot of lube and went very slow and was gentle and responsive to me when I winced or told him to hang on. While it was going on, I wasn't giving it much thought that I was a bottom but rather trying to just concentrate on not being in pain if that makes any sense. The experience was okay, pleasureable in a few random spurts and with a mind-blowing orgasm, but as a whole, painful and not too pleasureable. After it was done, I remember just being shocked that I had fit such a large object in my ass. I half wanted to look at my asshole but I was afraid to. Afterwards, in the days afterward, I felt really strange. REALLY strange. Physically, I was sore for a few days which I guess was to be expected given the size of his dick and my anal virginity, but had me freaked out for a bit. Emotionally and mentally, I felt odd too. Part of me was happy at having completed sort of the last "first" and having experienced all that I could with another man. The other part of me was incredibly disappointed and angry at myself for it being so spontaneous. I had thought that if I'd ever give up my ass, it would be well-planned, I'd have gotten more use to anal play, and I would've been with a partner for a long time whereas none of this held true for this situations. These feelings of doubt and guilt intensified when I didn't hear from him for awhile afterwards. I was really hard on myself. I felt used and disgusting, and was kicking myself for being an idiot. I regretted doing it. That was over two months ago. I still talk with the guy but we have yet to meet up and he gave an explanation to his vanishing and I sort of came clean about my feelings of disappointment and anger at the situation and he understood. It was the first time I felt any sort of emotional attachment to a person or had an emotional response to sex. So where it stands now, do I regret bottoming? I'm not sure. I'm not a natural bottom and don't see myself doing it again, so I guess in that respect it was good to have of done it, but I do partially regret the timing of it.
Lately, I've felt my curiosity about men and sex with them supremely satisfied. I feel like I've moved on from one phase into another. As I stated in another thread, there was a sort of slut phase that I went through and now I'm at the other end of it. I feel sort of like sexually I've done it all. I don't know what form my "gay life" will take. I know that I'm no longer as hard up and perma-horny as I once was. Now being sexually fulfilled, perhaps it's time to have other firsts like the first date and the first relationship, or conversely, perhaps my attraction in men will diminish as there is no longer the exotic allure there. I'm not sure what form my sexuality will take in the coming years. It sure does like to switch it up and keep me on my toes though.
I my first time ever fooling around in any extent with another guy was around 2.5 years ago when I was 23. My feelings of attraction to men had only surfaced a few months prior and while I thought it may be a phase, the feelings weren't going away so I decided that it was best while young and single to experiment a bit, rather than finding myself older and married to a woman with this bit of regret and curiosity in my head about being with another man (cheating is not an option for me), so I gave myself permission to explore a bit. After a few months of misfires and a lot of uncertainty and confusion about how to even go about doing such a thing, I met up with a man from craig's list for my first gay experience. I was more nervous than I could ever remember being. I was practically shaking. My stomach was queasy and I was just alternately petrified and excited. We met up, made out, felt each other up and gave each other head. It was my first time feeling another man's body, kissing another man or having a prolonged hug with one even. It was my first time seeing another man's dick. After it was over, knowing it was my first time, he asked me if I felt weird. I told him "strangely, no". I was really surprised that I wasn't as freaked out as I thought I'd be. After I left, it was very matter of fact. It did sort of feel odd though walking around that day, at the store or at home and just thinking that only a few hours ago, another man's dick was in my mouth. I felt relieved at having done it, at having finally after months of curiosity had this experience and at the time, thought I was done with it. My thirst had been quenched and my curiosity satisfied. Then however, I decided to meet up again with him, thinking that it would be a better experience the second time as my nerves would be far less. I did, and was again sort of satisfied for another few weeks before the desire came back again. Long story short, I'm still "experimenting", something that I thought back then would would be complete after one experience.
My first time having anal sex with another guy, as a top, was several months after the above experiences and with the same guy. In between my first hook-ups with him and this one, I had hooked up with I believe three other guys. Two of the experiences were horrible and I was sort of convinced that I was "off" men and really done, when another guy sort of fell into my lap and I found myself enjoying my time with him and my curiosity reignited. I got back in contact with the first guy and we met up. I'm not one to have anal sex with strangers; and not that he was a good friend or anything, but in having met up with him before, I felt a certain level of comfort with him. I decided that if I'm gonna really experiment with men, I should try anal sex and he was willing to be my first. I had never had anal sex with anyone, male or female before. I was sort of clueless as to what to do and I remember I actually came on here lurking and looking for tips beforehand. It was very basic when we got around to it. He slipped a condom and some lube on me and got on all fours and we did it doggystyle. As I was doing it, glancing down and seeing an ass, a man's ass bouncing up and down on my cock, I just couldn't quite believe that this was happening, that I was in this situation. When it was done with, he said he was impressed for an anal sex virgin that I lasted as long as I did. Looking back on it, I am too, since as i've posted in later threads, since then I've had a very difficult time getting hard enough to penetrate with anal sex. After this experience, I thought that I had reached sort of another level of "gayness" so to speak. This was no longer a one or two time "experiment". I had now been fooling around for months and had done so with a few guys and had now had anal sex with one. It became harder and harder to deny that this was just experimenting. To this day however, I have only had anal sex a handful of times, all with this same guy with me on top. We had a good long fuck buddy relationship but I'm pretty sure that's come to an end. I haven't had anal sex with him or anyone, with me on top, in well over a year.
My final "first" was my first time being a bottom. This happened only around two months ago. A different guy I had met on craig's list a few months before. We had met up a few times and got along really well in addition to being physically drawn to one another. Were circumstances different, I actually would've entertained the notion of dating him, something that I up until that point, had no interest in ever doing with another man. The bottoming was sort of spontaneous. He recommended it while we were in the middle of fooling around and I agreed. I was extremely nervous since his dick was so large and I had never had anything up my ass minus a finger, and even THAT hurt. He used a lot of lube and went very slow and was gentle and responsive to me when I winced or told him to hang on. While it was going on, I wasn't giving it much thought that I was a bottom but rather trying to just concentrate on not being in pain if that makes any sense. The experience was okay, pleasureable in a few random spurts and with a mind-blowing orgasm, but as a whole, painful and not too pleasureable. After it was done, I remember just being shocked that I had fit such a large object in my ass. I half wanted to look at my asshole but I was afraid to. Afterwards, in the days afterward, I felt really strange. REALLY strange. Physically, I was sore for a few days which I guess was to be expected given the size of his dick and my anal virginity, but had me freaked out for a bit. Emotionally and mentally, I felt odd too. Part of me was happy at having completed sort of the last "first" and having experienced all that I could with another man. The other part of me was incredibly disappointed and angry at myself for it being so spontaneous. I had thought that if I'd ever give up my ass, it would be well-planned, I'd have gotten more use to anal play, and I would've been with a partner for a long time whereas none of this held true for this situations. These feelings of doubt and guilt intensified when I didn't hear from him for awhile afterwards. I was really hard on myself. I felt used and disgusting, and was kicking myself for being an idiot. I regretted doing it. That was over two months ago. I still talk with the guy but we have yet to meet up and he gave an explanation to his vanishing and I sort of came clean about my feelings of disappointment and anger at the situation and he understood. It was the first time I felt any sort of emotional attachment to a person or had an emotional response to sex. So where it stands now, do I regret bottoming? I'm not sure. I'm not a natural bottom and don't see myself doing it again, so I guess in that respect it was good to have of done it, but I do partially regret the timing of it.
Lately, I've felt my curiosity about men and sex with them supremely satisfied. I feel like I've moved on from one phase into another. As I stated in another thread, there was a sort of slut phase that I went through and now I'm at the other end of it. I feel sort of like sexually I've done it all. I don't know what form my "gay life" will take. I know that I'm no longer as hard up and perma-horny as I once was. Now being sexually fulfilled, perhaps it's time to have other firsts like the first date and the first relationship, or conversely, perhaps my attraction in men will diminish as there is no longer the exotic allure there. I'm not sure what form my sexuality will take in the coming years. It sure does like to switch it up and keep me on my toes though.
123kid
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I had a hard time emotionally after my first time because I wasnt used to the idea of being a "cocksucker". Its grown on me over the years.
lol ya know what they say.... suck one little cock and your a cock sucker the rest of your life