Should I fuck my boss?

[Durango95]

Sex complicates any relationship, even the very best one. I've succumbed to the temptation twice in years past. Both instances resulted in the loss of the job, not to mention you have no reference and you just don't know what people are saying about you behind your back.

 

[snapon]

So I am getting my shit together. I am going to just let it be, act as usual. Not sure what to do if he comes on to me? Being a virgin who is really ready not to be, I'm not sure I could resist. However, I plan on coming out to one of my better friends on saturday when he comes home from college. I hope this is the right decision, i don't think he will have a negative reaction but I don't know about my other best friend. We have known each other since we were three years old, but he has said on multiple occasions that he "hates" gay people, but never gave a reason. Sorry for the rambling, just thinking out loud.

 

[Seasoned]

It's not a ramble. Good luck this weekend! As for your other friend, if he truly hates gay people, which might be more bravado than fact, you've already done your share of tiptoeing. The tide has turned. It's homophobes who are now the outcasts in forward looking circles. He has more to explain than you.

 

[AngolaZee]

What if he was hoping you would discover the files. I mean i have porn but i lock it with TrueCrypt to make sure even the FBI wold never find it. To make you work on his computer (without his supervision) is a little bit odgy. Either way better stay clear unless he comes on to you

 

[Ganoderma]

I plan on coming out to one of my better friends on saturday when he comes home from college. I hope this is the right decision, i don't think he will have a negative reaction but I don't know about my other best friend. We have known each other since we were three years old, but he has said on multiple occasions that he "hates" gay people, but never gave a reason. Sorry for the rambling, just thinking out loud.

hi Snapon,

Good to read that you have decided to come out to one of your better friends. I tend to think that this is right now (you are 21 years, and I assume he will also be around your age) a good moment to tell him the truth about yourself. So I would like to wish you good luck. I hope he will react on a positive way, and that things will not change alot when he is aware that you are gay. Well, I even predict that the friendship between you and him will improve, as right now he does not have a real idea why you don't have a girlfriend, and why you don't seem to be interested in girls.

When things go well with him (and I am expecting that this will be the case), then there is the other guy. Well, real homophobes cannot be friends with gay guys, that's out of the question. So either he will excuse himself for all these homophobic ideas / opinions (or consider them as outdated, or bad informed, or whatever) and he will stay good friends with you as soon as he becomes aware that you are gay. Or you must decide that he not a 'best friend', and thus must decide to stop with being friends with him.

Friend A (first one you want to out yourself) and friend B are aware of each other? You might also discuss this topic (the reaction of B) with friend A, after you have told A that you are gay?

Anyway, I would like to wish you good luck by telling him that you are a gay guy. Take care.

Feel free to react and/or ask addition questions.

 

[snapon]

What if he was hoping you would discover the files. I mean i have porn but i lock it with TrueCrypt to make sure even the FBI wold never find it. To make you work on his computer (without his supervision) is a little bit odgy. Either way better stay clear unless he comes on to you

Perhaps. He is very computer illiterate (why I do his computer work) so I don't think he knows that that kind of stuff is saved in the download folder, much less how to hide it. But who knows, maybe he is the one throwing me for a loop and setting it up. Either way, I am not going to pursue it any further, it will be up to him.

hi Snapon,

Good to read that you have decided to come out to one of your better friends. I tend to think that this is right now (you are 21 years, and I assume he will also be around your age) a good moment to tell him the truth about yourself. So I would like to wish you good luck. I hope he will react on a positive way, and that things will not change alot when he is aware that you are gay. Well, I even predict that the friendship between you and him will improve, as right now he does not have a real idea why you don't have a girlfriend, and why you don't seem to be interested in girls.

When things go well with him (and I am expecting that this will be the case), then there is the other guy. Well, real homophobes cannot be friends with gay guys, that's out of the question. So either he will excuse himself for all these homophobic ideas / opinions (or consider them as outdated, or bad informed, or whatever) and he will stay good friends with you as soon as he becomes aware that you are gay. Or you must decide that he not a 'best friend', and thus must decide to stop with being friends with him.

Friend A (first one you want to out yourself) and friend B are aware of each other? You might also discuss this topic (the reaction of B) with friend A, after you have told A that you are gay?

Anyway, I would like to wish you good luck by telling him that you are a gay guy. Take care.

Feel free to react and/or ask addition questions.

Thanks for the support, I really appreciate it. Friend A is actually coming home today but I am not sure I am ready to bring it up. I was sure about it yesterday that I was going to, but now that it is coming closer I am just feeling a lot of mixed emotions. Part of me is afraid (not sure of what) and the other side KNOWS that this is the situation, and holding it in further is just going to make things worse in the long run. I guess I just gotta stop being a pussy and get it over with. After the initial "outing", does it get easier? With friends at least, parent's and family is going to be a whole other issue.

 

[snapon]

Well, I was hanging out with both friend A and B tonight. While we were hanging out, Friend B was trying to hook me up with some chick he met (this doesn't happen often). I kinda went along with the oh, thats cool, but trying to dodge any commitment but they kept pushing. I was at the point where it was really getting to me and I was just about to blurt it out (don;t think this would have been good) but in the nick of time I recieved a phone call and they ended the discussion after.

I will be hanging out with friend A tomorrow by himself, and I am going to do it. Wish me luck.

 

[bankside]

I wonder if his last escort also started by working for him as a computer tech.

"Oh no! I'm so embarrassed! I didn't mean for you to see my entire 4 terabyte collection of "Bear on Twink Action Videos." Oh I'm so embarrassed! Will you show me how to clear my cache? I'll pay you extra for it. I want you to clear it alll…..clear it deeeep…oh my god i think i'm cumming…."

Your first experience?

 

[Dobson73]

110% agree. A major no-no to do what you've done. And nope, probably one of the worst ideas you've had this week. Let him be who he choses to be.

Yeah, not a good idea. Also, you have no excuse for roaming into his personal files.

 

[Dobson73]

Sorry, Safari issue and two replies at one.

 

[Dobson73]

So I am getting my shit together. I am going to just let it be, act as usual. Not sure what to do if he comes on to me? Being a virgin who is really ready not to be, I'm not sure I could resist. However, I plan on coming out to one of my better friends on saturday when he comes home from college. I hope this is the right decision, i don't think he will have a negative reaction but I don't know about my other best friend. We have known each other since we were three years old, but he has said on multiple occasions that he "hates" gay people, but never gave a reason. Sorry for the rambling, just thinking out loud.

Good on you and good luck. I'm in a different time zone so not sure if you've done this yet. It's an incredibly brave and empowering thing that we do; to tell another human being that we're not what they see and it may challenge every fibre of their being. But it also challenges every fibre of our own being to face someone you love, eye to eye, and say "I'm not who you thought I was".

I wish you well, my friend and all power to you. After the first comes many, many people and each step is so much easier. You will very quickly learn that the people who care love you and among them will be "The One"!

 

[Ganoderma]

Well, I was hanging out with both friend A and B tonight. While we were hanging out, Friend B was trying to hook me up with some chick he met (this doesn't happen often). I kinda went along with the oh, thats cool, but trying to dodge any commitment but they kept pushing. I was at the point where it was really getting to me and I was just about to blurt it out (don;t think this would have been good) but in the nick of time I recieved a phone call and they ended the discussion after. I will be hanging out with friend A tomorrow by himself, and I am going to do it. Wish me luck.

hi Snapon,

Thanks for the update and for your friendly reply. Yeah, I think you should stop with being a pussy. So just tell friend A that you prefer guys and that this was the reason why you gave such a lousy reply when friend B (and A) were pushing you to get in contact with that girl. By telling this to him, you don't need to stay hiding this kind of things to him anymore. I mean, A and B will keep wondering why you are not interested in getting a girlfriend, and likely they don't understand your lousy excuses. Maybe (who knows?) both might have already some clues why you don't want to hook up girls?

I cannot predict for sure what will happen and how B will react when you tell him that you like guys. On the other hand, you are living in the US and its right now 2013. The general opinion about gay people is changing alot and I would like to remind you to what Seasoned told you

The tide has turned. It's homophobes who are now the outcasts in forward looking circles. He has more to explain than you.

Finally, there is only one way to go on and that's telling them the truth. Right now, you are -more or less- lying to them (= don't tell them the real reason why you don't want to hook up with that girl), and you must realize yourself that you will need to ly (hide) more and more in the course of the time (as long as you don't tell the truth to them). So better tell them now, and see how they react. I mean, how do you see the future when you will get in contact with other gay guys? Do you also want to hide this kind of information to your best friends? Good friends (= straight guys who are long-term friends) of a gay guy understand very well that gay guys will also have gay friends.

So please don't be a pussy and tell friend A the real reason why you did not wanted to hook up with that girl.

I would like to wish you good luck and please keep us informed.

Best wishes & take care.

 

[Ninja108]

No,because at the end of the day,he's in a position of power over you. Never good in a relationship.

 

[cgymike]

So here is goes. I do a lot of accounting/computer work for my boss on his home computer, and while searching for a file I downloaded I came across some gay porn. This peaked my interest, so I looked though his computer history (shady I know, but I need to know what I was getting into) and I'm glad I did. He had a couple searches in the m4m section of craigslist, and he has been meeting with an escort which he pays, although I'm not sure how far they go or how often. He is closeted as far as I know, as well as myself.



Here's the deal. I am 21 and have never been with another guy, but I really want to and I feel like this is the perfect opportunity. He is 53, bear type which I am attracted to. I am not really attracted to guys my own age, and have always been to afraid to meet a random hook up from a4a or craigslist. The positives are that I'm sure he is discreet, which I would like as well because alot of people I know know him as well, and I am not ready to come out. This is actually like the first time I have actually been about to do something with another guy. However, some of my concerns are how safe he plays with his other hook ups (from what I saw, it was only the one guy for the past few months) and how it will affect my job. I am not looking for a relationship, I would really just like to try stuff with a guy and see where it goes. Fwb would be what I;m looking for if I do enjoy it, if I go through with it.

Anyone have any advice whether or not I should try something? How should I go about it? Any advice is greatly appreciated!

No because if anything goes wrong he can retaliate by firing you for any number of reasons and you wouldn't be able to prove anything. Then you would have no job and no reference from him. Has this happened? You bet!

 

[kibashyho]

Discreetly for a raise, but their are a lot of ppl that will hook up with u sexy man

 

[snapon]

No because if anything goes wrong he can retaliate by firing you for any number of reasons and you wouldn't be able to prove anything. Then you would have no job and no reference from him. Has this happened? You bet!

No,because at the end of the day,he's in a position of power over you. Never good in a relationship.

Discreetly for a raise, but their are a lot of ppl that will hook up with u sexy man

Not sure if you guys have read the thread, it has moved far past this...