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So, I got sucked into a love triangle....

Tigara

Tigara

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So, Monday night at the bar, it's back to school night (college town), I go to try and meet some friends while everyone is still new. I meet these people, one of them is a bi guy. We'll call him Jeff for now. We start hanging out and stuff for the next few days, kinda become a couple and all that fun stuff. I like him, just not quite sure to what extent yet. Too soon to tell, ya know.

Today at work, I get a call and it turns out to be his ex. We'll call him Greg. Jeff still talks to Greg and has been telling him about me and Greg thinks I sound awesome and cool and stuff. So I get a call and tell him I'm at work, I'll text him later. So I do, reluctantly, and he ends up asking me out and wants to get to know me. I tell him I've cheated once before and I"m never doing it again. He just replies along the lines of "Yeah, I hate cheaters too. " He also goes on about how Jeff still has feelings for him but he doesn't return them. It all seems a bit weird to me

Advice?
 
Heh, I didn't give him my number. My bf told him where I worked and he found my work number.
 
He knows that he called, but not that we texted. It's hard to tell how he reacted. I told him I was weirded out and so jeff said he was kinda weirded out too, but that's all I got.
 
If he hates cheaters he would not be asking you out. But if your boyfriend still has feelings for him, he may use this to his advantage and make himself to be the victim somehow.
 
Why? I don't know. Just trying to figure out his agenda, possibly. Anther possibility is that I'm just too good natured to shut people down like that.
 
Well, if you want to figure out his agenda, then you're just going to have to ask him. Running to a porn forum board is useless because we don't know the guy either. If you love the drama, then by all means allow yourself to get sucked into the unresolved issues between two people.

We'll call him Jeff for now
Click to expand...

Are we going to call him something else later?
 
Tigara, you know what, I think Greg is doing what people call "keep your enemy closer". He may be not over Jeff yet and being jealous by the fact that you (may) have a tendency to become Jeff's new bf.
Personally, I think you should talk about it with Jeff. If they're really over, Jeff will have a way to make sure Greg understand that things between them already belong to the past. Try to be calm and kind (at least in the outside, you could swear Greg here haha if he's too annoying). If he keeps messing with you after their talks, idk, we'll deal with him later :D
 
It doesn't sound like you got sucked in so much as wandered in. At any point, you could've said "Well, now that I'm dating Jeff, I feel a bit weird talking to his ex without him around" and ended the conversation. Basically, the ball is completely in your court.

If you want to cut him off, cut him off.
If you want to keep talking to him, keep talking to him.
If you want to see him on the side, see him on the side.

Lex
 
by responding you opened the door. You should have just ignored it completely. You should have told the new guy what he did. If you dont start with honesty in the beginning it tends to confusing.

I would not respond to any calls, text whatever from him. That is if you want to keep things cool with your guy...
 
Any new update? Would love to hear how this gets resolved.
 
Tigara said:
Heh, I didn't give him my number. My bf told him where I worked and he found my work number.
Click to expand...

RED FLAG!

The Ex hunted you down to what? Become you bosom buddy?

This is borderline stalker behavior.

Why do you think that it’s not nice to exempt yourself from a situation that “weirds you out?”
 
Think of it as a fictional episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation:

The Enterprise is being sucked into a brown hole orbited by a strange comet.

What would Jean-Luc Picard do?
 
OK, so the update.

I haven't talked to Greg since, I think he got the jist that I wasn't interested.

Last night I ended up breaking up with Jeff. There wasn't a connection there beyond just being friends and I kinda enjoy remaining a drama-free zone. I can't quite tell how he took it. He said he was fine and "He was used to it" (That broke my heart to hear. Like, for real). I told him that I still like him as a friend and wanted to hang with him sometimes, but we'll see how that goes. I feel like a total ass for doing it, though. But if it's not going to go anywhere, best to not lead him on and make it worse later, right?
 
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