The Fear

[bwbw86]

On Saturday I ended up with some bad people. One of them was a total asshole and all he could talk about was how he could kick my and my buddys asses. There wasn't a fight because neither of us stood up for ourselves. He was a big, angry dude but Im not a little guy. I work out almost every day. He totally used his attitude to control people and it's really been bothering me. It makes me feel weak and powerless. I've never been in a physical fight. Never really saw the need to. But there comes a point where people like that need to be put in their place. I very well could have whipped him. But there exists this fear that I would lose. The fear affects so much of me. How do I get rid of it. I'm tired of feeling afraid.

I know this doesn't really have to do with being gay or relationships but I figured I could get some advice as a man-to-man type of deal

 

[puka-pride]

big talk = little penis

 

[sdmister4]

big talk = little penis

hahaha

how much does he really affect your life? i mean, anyone can be ignored and brushed off if they only show up once in a while.

and on the odd chance he does win in a fight, he gets fueled. if not, he wants a rematch to prove his masculinity. let it blow over, he'll get bored, and eventually everyone will get tired of him and thats when he'll really learn that he's an asshole.

 

[Fishstix]

Don't start a physical fight, some crazy fuckers have guns with them or will leave to get guns. If someone starts one with you, it's ok to defend yourself but I don't think it's smart to start one. Just stay as far away from him as possible. If you don't like him, you don't have to associate with him. One of these days, he's going to come across someone just like him and they're going to get into a fight and have their asses kicked. Or they'll do something ending up in jail or lose their job because no one wants to work with people like that. They'll either change for the better or go nowhere. You don't have to get involved with someone who makes you feel like shit and degrades you. Try to find ways to get a tougher skin and not let things bother you as much, that's what I'm trying to do. It's hard but there are ways to improve getting a tougher skin, you just have to find them.

 

[KaraBulut]

big talk = little penis

And usually with a big drinking problem.

On the weekends, emergency rooms are full of guys out to prove something with their fists. Quite a few arrive in handcuffs. Some are shipped off to jail. Some are shipped off to the morgue.

When faced with the prospect of a fight with someone who is out of control, there's little to be lost from walking away. Very little gets proven. And very little ever really gets settled with fists.

 

[Willie Boy]

On Saturday I ended up with some bad people. One of them was a total asshole and all he could talk about was how he could kick my and my buddys asses. There wasn't a fight because neither of us stood up for ourselves. He was a big, angry dude but Im not a little guy. I work out almost every day. He totally used his attitude to control people and it's really been bothering me. It makes me feel weak and powerless. I've never been in a physical fight. Never really saw the need to. But there comes a point where people like that need to be put in their place. I very well could have whipped him. But there exists this fear that I would lose. The fear affects so much of me. How do I get rid of it. I'm tired of feeling afraid.

I know this doesn't really have to do with being gay or relationships but I figured I could get some advice as a man-to-man type of deal

The best thing to do is ignore him. Don't be intimidated by him, his words are meaningless so don't let them control you. You can't live your life in fear.

Don't go out and start a fight with him, but be ready to defend yourself if the need arises. Remember, true peace does not come about through the absense of violence, but the abundance of justice.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

Don't start a physical fight. Don't threaten him with violence, because even if you win it'll make you look like a douche.

If he says he'll kick your ass, simply tell him there would be no point for him to try 'cause you'd win. Leave it at that. Otherwise ignore him.

You don't need to beat someone up to put them in their place. Telling them you're not impressed usually does the trick.

 

[3nipples]

Your question is how to get rid of the fear you have of getting into a fight. The short answer is experience.

You need to learn that getting hit or punched may be unpleasant, but is not really as bad as you expect it to be. The best way to learn this is in a "safe" environment, in a class with an instructor. In my opinion a self defence class would be better than one to learn fighting.

What the others said about actually getting into a fight is true. It's a stupid thing to do for all the reasons stated and you should avoid it at all costs unless you really have no alternative; but there is a difference between walking away because you're afraid and doing it because you're smart.

 

[giorgiobaby]

My personal rule...words really can't hurt, especially from someone who doesn't know you well enough to matter. You can say all you want to me, just don't touch me. The minute you touch me, I'm going for your throat. This person sounds like he has issues he has to prove by sounding or acting tough. If he hits you or anyone, call the police, it's a matter of assault. Ignore him if possible next time, or just deflate his ego....if he says he can kick your ass, just look him in the eye and say "so what" and turn away.