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They are always asking if I have a girlfriend?

B

beucurt

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First of all, I am sorry about my English. English is not my native language

I'm 18 male, in the closet. My mom never ask about me having a girlfriend, but my stepfather(egoistic asshole) is always pushing it. He said that I should have one because I'm old enough.

Stepfather: Do you already have a girlfriend?
Me: *nervous laugh* no...hahaha
Stepfather: You're already 18, you should have one
Me: hahahaha....I'm busy with my college stuffs
Stepfather: But a girlfriend will make you more Inspired
Me: "laughs*

This always happens every time we talk I'm so tired of being paranoid.

How should I deal with this?

Should I come out? How?
 
Tell your stepfather that your boyfriend wouldn't like it if you have a girlfriend as well.
 
Depends. Do you live somewhere where coming out will cause major hassles? If not, the above suggestions are the ones to take.

Lex
 
Obnoxious isn't it? That's one of the reasons I came out, so those fucking questions about a fucking girlfriend would stop. Eventually that's what you should be doing, but I'm guessing at your age and time in your life you're still trying to hide it. In which case, laugh nervously and change the subject.
 
^ Bingo. Coming out doesn't complicate your life - it usually simplifies it.

Lex
 
In the Latin culture, the only reason people ask if you have a girlfriend is to find out if you are gay or not. He prob. wants to know if you're gay or suspects you are.

I bet he will continue asking til' you come out.
 
^Yep. And I agree that coming out simplifies your life.
 
I'm 99.9% sure that my parents know I'm gay. But still, the 'girlfriend' questions are frequent... "Met a nice woman at work yet?" Well, yes, plenty. "Have you asked a girl out yet?" I'm almost 30 and have NEVER been on a date with a woman (or man for that matter)... Perhaps it's just blind hope? The 'girlfriend' questions bring out the worst in me. Are my adverse reactions not a clue?
 
The answer that you gave is the best one, as long as you believe it to be true. You're busy with your studies and you don't have time for a relationship.

If he persists, answer "What did I tell you the last time that you asked?".

When you are done with your studies and making your own money (and not financially dependent upon your parents), then you can give whatever answer you want.
 
hijodelaestrella said:
I'm 99.9% sure that my parents know I'm gay. But still, the 'girlfriend' questions are frequent... "Met a nice woman at work yet?" Well, yes, plenty. "Have you asked a girl out yet?" I'm almost 30 and have NEVER been on a date with a woman (or man for that matter)... Perhaps it's just blind hope? The 'girlfriend' questions bring out the worst in me. Are my adverse reactions not a clue?
Click to expand...

They just want you to be honest and happy. Why else would they ask? I agree, it's not the greatest question to ask, or the best way to go about it, but they don't know any better.

Unless you think your family hates you, or will go totally ballistic if you come out, they're probably just prodding you.

What are you waiting for? (*8*)
 
Lube said:
They just want you to be honest and happy. Why else would they ask? I agree, it's not the greatest question to ask, or the best way to go about it, but they don't know any better.

Unless you think your family hates you, or will go totally ballistic if you come out, they're probably just prodding you.

What are you waiting for? (*8*)
Click to expand...

'What am I waiting for?' is an excellent question, and one that I ask myself everyday. It's true: they love me unconditionally and they're very liberal minded. I wanna come out (at least at home) before my 30th birthday. That gives me 5 months :eek: My mom has even asked me over the years about my sexuality. She's actually said to me 'Are you gay? Cause if you are, I love you no matter what.' The opportunity was handed to me on a silver platter and I passed. I think about it and call myself an idiot.
 
ill help you and call you an idiot too. haha just kidding a little closet bashing YOU LUCKY SOB.
 
I would just try coming out... but also work on gaining some independence too.
 
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