Tips for a straight acting gay to pick up guys?

[Megamede]

I'm going into my Freshmen year of college in August and I really wanna meet some guys. I come off more of a straight guy than a stereotypical gay guy so how can I meet some gay guys in school? Should I act more gay? I just really want to meet someone this year and it'll be my very first boyfriend. Any advice?

 

[TX-Beau]

There is no such thing as a straight acting gay guy, since guys who act like straight guys don't pick up other guys. So yeah, that could be a problem.

You might start by not worrying about how straight guys act and how gay guys act and focus on how you act - then go find some gay guys and see how that works for you.

 

[Seasoned]

Welcome to JUB. Put yourself in gay surroundings. Be out. Participate in activities to meet as many people as you can. Good luck to you and don't forget to play AND study.

PS. I will tell you that your "straight acting" phrasing will cause some to breathe fire. It might work for phone sex or online hook ups, but face to face just be you and let others be attracted or not. Once you're on your knees or your legs are in the air it won't matter much whether you swing your hips when you walk. This is just friendly advice from someone who could be your grandpa.

 

[TX-Beau]

Seasoned is right, you have to be out to be noticed. No one is going to find you if you don't put yourself out there and I've got to tell ya, unless you're at some kind of loony religious institution, college is a huge fucking target rich environment.

The other thing is DO NOT go out looking for a relationship. Guys who do that get burned a lot, because they are focusing on fairy tales in their heads and not on the guy they're actually confronted with. They try to make the guy fit the relationship, which is backward.

Go meet a lot of guys, take them for who they are, have a good time, let what develops on the way develop in it's own good time. You do NOT have to date every guy you date, and you're in no kind of hurry - and there's NOTHING wrong with that.

 

[chace1617]

no act str8 and be yourself. i think the only thing can attract people is self confidence, don't pretend you're something else so people can like u.

i love str8 guys and i always want to have sex with them, my problem is they never care about me lol

 

[KaraBulut]

Just be honest. Just be yourself. If you're honest and out, then other gay guys won't have to waste their time trying to second-guess whether you're available.

If you're looking for a conversation starter- a reason for a gay guy to come up and talk to you- then wear a subtle item such as a small rainbow bracelet or wrist band while you're on campus. Or if you're in a fairly liberal university, wear a T-shirt or other item of clothing every now with a gay-friendly political statement. It gives open-minded straight people and gay guys an excuse to talk to you.

P.S. And never use the term "straight acting" ever again. You're a masculine gay guy. It's really hard to refer to yourself as straight-acting when you have a cock in your mouth.

 

[bhandsome]

I'm also in the same boat when it comes to having no gay friends. I have gay acquaintances but they are just annoying; it's just these particular individuals and their personalities.

So this thread is pretty much beneficial to me as well.

 

[jdoe4822]

as someone who would normally label himself "str8t acting", I'd would recommend you ditch that phrase, whether or not it's accurate just cause it can be controversial.

I agree with other posters that you need to just be yourself, but that includes not being out, flaming, and flamboyant if that's not who you are. When I first came out, I tried to listen to showtunes, get more in touch with my "feminine" side, and act more stereotypically gay and I quickly realized it didn't work and wasn't who I was. So now I'm back to cargo shorts, white t-shirts, sandals with socks, and Disturbed's latest album blaring off my iphone.

As far as rainbow stickers, buttons, or wristbands, I'd still say do whatever you feel comfortable with. Me personally, I don't like to think that I'm defining myself by my sexual orientation, and it's not something I need to express pride in (nor be ashamed of, it just is what it is). That being said, it would certainly be a good give away.

You can usually find a lot of gay and lesbian oriented clubs and even things like recreational sports groups on a college campus or in surrounding towns. Again, not my sort of thing, but still a place to start if you're cool with it.

Unfortunately, I don't have any easy answers for your exact situation that have worked for me. There's always a variety of online sites, but those can be hit or miss (I met my ex one one, and my most likely current prospect on another). I would say to make sure you are out with your friends. I've had two try to set me up with other guys.

I would also encourage you to be patient. We all would love to have someone as a partner, but make sure you take care of you first and that you're ok with just you and being on your own first. You want to have your own identity so you don't get sucked in to your first relationship in an unhealthy way.

 

[ariesstar89]

My advice here is the same as everyone else:

Be yourself, stay true to yourself, and get out there.

Its a lot more fun to just see what happens then trying to force something. It builds up the "like" factor. And don't rush into anything on the drop of a hat. Just relax and enjoy the college scene