Humor-Satire Trump Staff Picks, Co-Conspirators and the Revolving Door of Departures [2024 Edition]

[KaraBulut]

Please do, Ka$h. We would love to hear the depositions on this one.

FBI Director Kash Patel sues magazine over 'false' claims he's a drunk

Patel, 46, brought his lawsuit on Monday against the magazine, accusing them of publishing an article that was 'replete with false and obviously fabricated allegations' meant to get him fired.

www.dailymail.co.uk

Kash Patel has sued The Atlantic magazine over a 'malicious and defamatory hit piece' alleging he has a serious drinking problem.

The FBI director, 46, brought his lawsuit on Monday against the magazine and staff writer Sarah Fitzpatrick, accusing them of publishing an article that was 'replete with false and obviously fabricated allegations' meant to 'drive him from office.' ...

The Atlantic's report also alleged that early in his tenure leading the bureau, meetings were forced to be rescheduled later in the day to accommodate what it describes as Patel’s alleged 'nighttime drinking' habits.

Drinking to the 'obvious point of intoxication,' as alleged in the report, violates FBI conduct rules and leaves the nation’s top law enforcement official vulnerable to the possible risk of coercion or exploitation.

 

[rareboy]

Bye bye, ICE Barbie and her side piece, Corey. Re-hi, Cameron Hamilton.

Trump seems to have done a turnaround on guys with beards. Usually, he likes his men clean-shaven, tall and lean.

https://www.cnn.com/cameron-hamilton-to-be-nominated-fema-chief

View attachment 3674311

Everything old is new again....I also think they are running out of candidates...this one they can cover with it being Lewandowski's fault he was fired.

And I also suspet that the TRUMPCo. owners/donors finally got to Trump about how this was hurting them.

 

[KaraBulut]

Trump's staff picks are sexual predators, pedophiles or rapists, and their husbands are, too!

Lori Chavez-DeRemer is the Secretary of Labor. Doesn't ring a bell? Well... she has a post in this very thread, discussing accusations that she is an alcoholic who has been accused of drinking in her office and there's rumors that she's fucking one of her employees.

Humor-Satire Post in thread 'Trump Staff Picks, Co-Conspirators and the Revolving Door of Departures [2024 Edition]'

Jan 14, 2026

One of the amazing things about the current incarnation of what used to be the Republican Party is that they have found such a large number of amoral alcoholic women to run for political office or to nominate for positions in the Trump Administration.

https://thehill.com/homenews/administration/5687447-chavez-deremer-staff-investigation/

Labor secretary’s top staffers placed on leave amid misconduct investigation

Two of Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer’s top staffers have reportedly been placed on leave amid an internal investigation into allegations that taxpayers footed...

• KaraBulut

Now, her hubby, an anesthesiologist, has apparently been booty-shopping at his wife's workplace, too.

Labor secretary's husband barred from HQ after claims he sexually assaulted women there: MS Now

The Labor Department's inspector general is investigating the situation, and a complaint has been made to police in Washington, D.C., the report said.

www.cnbc.com

View attachment 3543181

That's female cabinet member #3. Linda McMahon might want to start packing.

This was a two-fer. The labor secretary who was fucking a staff member and a husband who couldn't stop texting and touching his wife's staff. Apparently, the female staffers who filed complaints were also retaliated against.

Rumor has it that Chavez-Deremer was invited to a meeting at the White House and submitted her resignation shortly thereafter.

Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer is leaving Trump's Cabinet after abuse of power allegations

Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer is out of President Donald Trump’s Cabinet after multiple allegations of abusing her position, including an affair with a subordinate and drinking on the job.

apnews.com

Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer is leaving Trump’s Cabinet after abuse of power allegation

Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer is out of President Donald Trump’s Cabinet, the White House said Monday, after multiple allegations of abusing her position’s power, including having an affair with a subordinate and drinking alcohol on the job.

Chavez-DeRemer is the third Trump Cabinet member to leave her post after Trump fired his embattled Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem in March and ousted Attorney General Pam Bondi earlier this month.

Unlike other recent Cabinet departures, Chavez-DeRemer’s exit was announced by a White House aide, not by the president on his social media account.

 

[KaraBulut]

Corey Lewandowski. Recent "consultant" and unpaid "special governmental employee" who was the chief of staff for DHS and fuckboy for former DHS secretary and ICE Barbie, Kristi Noem.

We inherited Lewandowski from Trump. He was Trump's campaign manager during the 2016 campaign. Like most flunkies associated with Trump he's a lunatic, liar, and an intellectually limited scofflaw.

Some DHS contractors told White House officials they were asked to pay Corey Lewandowski

Some companies complained to the Trump administration that Lewandowski has stood to personally profit from the DHS contracting process. Lewandowski denies the allegations.

www.nbcnews.com

Some DHS contractors told White House officials they were asked to pay Corey Lewandowski
Some companies complained to the Trump administration that Lewandowski has stood to personally profit from the DHS contracting process. Lewandowski denies the allegations.

"Pay Corey Lewandowski"... otherwise known as a bribe. No word (yet) on whether Lewandowski accepted his payments in a brown paper bag, like the other DHS criminal, Tom Homan.

But Zoley and his advisers were worried that the road to securing new government contracts now ran through Lewandowski. The two had history: Lewandowski and Zoley had butted heads during the transition between Trump’s November 2024 election and his January 2025 inauguration, before Lewandowski officially worked for the government, according to two industry sources and one senior DHS official familiar with the matter.

During the transition, Lewandowski told Zoley that he wanted to be paid in exchange for protecting and growing GEO Group’s DHS contracts, according to a senior DHS official and three people familiar with their discussion. Zoley, concerned about the propriety of the ask, told Lewandowski he would have no part of it, the sources said, describing the confrontation as tense.

 

[KaraBulut]

Another one bites the dust.

President Trump's top Immigration and Customs Enforcement official, Todd Lyons, said he would resign on Thursday as acting director, adding to the list of leadership shakeups at the Department of Homeland Security.

His exit, which will be effective May 31, comes amid continued scrutiny of his agency's aggressive immigration tactics and a record-long funding lapse from Congress that resulted in a lack of pay for ICE attorneys, investigators and administrative staff. It was not immediately clear why he was leaving.

Under his tenure, the agency took the lead in Trump's mass deportation agenda, rapidly scaling up sweeping arrests across the country. Lyons faced intense pressure to carry out the administration's deportation goals, which included 3,000 arrests a day. ICE has not met that number.

He also oversaw a hiring surge that brought on 12,000 new employees, a record-high number of people in immigration detention and over 570,000 deportations.

https://www.npr.org/2026/04/17/g-s1-117780/ice-acting-director-lyons-will-resign-at-end-of-may

Oh... more details about Todd Lyons' reasons for resigning.

https://www.politico.com/news/2026/03/27/todd-lyons-ice-stress-hospital-00848458

Acting head of Immigration and Customs Enforcement Todd Lyons has been hospitalized at least twice for stress-related issues as he has carried out President Donald Trump’s aggressive immigration agenda — strain that has caused him to struggle to make key decisions for the agency, according to two current and two former administration officials.

The hospitalizations took place over the last seven months. In one incident in December, Lyons’ security detail drove him to a hospital in Washington and he was admitted overnight, according to one former and two current administration officials. During an episode in September, the three people said Lyons was hospitalized for at least one night.

In a separate incident in Los Angeles over the summer, Lyons became so distressed when ICE agents couldn’t locate a migrant on their target list after a ride along with top administration officials that one of his bodyguards took a portable defibrillator from a nearby government office to Lyons in case he needed medical intervention, according to one current and one former official.

 

[KaraBulut]

More about Lori Chavez-DeRemer...

Exclusive | Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer under investigation for ‘inappropriate’ relationship with employee

A workplace complaint accused the secretary of the indiscretions while also alleging she has been shirking duties at department headquarters and drinking in her office.

nypost.com

Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer under investigation for ‘inappropriate’ relationship with employee

Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer is under an internal investigation following an explosive complaint alleging she’s been “abusing her position” by pursuing an “inappropriate” relationship with a subordinate, according to sources and documents reviewed by The Post.

Chavez-DeRemer, 57, has welcomed her alleged paramour at least three times to her DC apartment and twice into her hotel room while traveling, alleges a complaint filed with the Department of Labor’s (DOL) Office of Inspector General last week, which has since begun a probe.

The former Oregon congresswoman is also accused of drinking in her office during the workday and committing “travel fraud” by having her chief of staff and deputy chief of staff “make up” official trips to destinations where Chavez-DeRemer can spend time with family or friends on the taxpayers’ dime.

Embattled Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer hit with discrimination complaints over response to husband’s alleged sexual misconduct

Young female staffers filed complaints alleging Shawn DeRemer, the embattled labor secretary’s husband, sexually abused them inside the department’s Washington, DC, headquarters.

nypost.com

Embattled Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer hit with discrimination complaints over response to husband’s alleged sexual misconduct

Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer has been accused of retaliating against the female employees who reported her husband for alleged sexual misconduct, The Post has learned.

At least three Equal Employment Opportunity complaints have been filed against Chavez-DeRemer.

Two of the complaints were lodged by the young female staffers that alleged Shawn DeRemer, the embattled labor secretary’s husband, sexually abused them inside the department’s Washington, DC, headquarters.

 

[rareboy]

It is so nice that it is the women who brought her down.

 

[KaraBulut]

I will be surprised if Ka$h lasts another month.

 

[Alistair]

 

[KaraBulut]

DHS again. Priceless.

High-ranking DHS official sidelined over allegations of 'sugar daddy' relationship, luxe gifts and drug use

A high-ranking DHS official is on administrative leave after an investigation into alleged sugar daddy ties, lavish spending and drug use, sources say.

www.foxnews.com

High-ranking DHS official sidelined over allegations of 'sugar daddy' relationship, luxe gifts and drug use
Julia Varvaro, 29, allegedly received $40K in gifts during a 3-month relationship that began on dating app

Fox News has learned a high-ranking Department of Homeland Security (DHS) official is on administrative leave after an investigation was launched into the leader's alleged "sugar daddy" relationship, lavish spending and drug use, according to a DHS official.

The probe unfolded after a formal complaint was filed against Julia Varvaro, 29, the DHS deputy assistant secretary for counterterrorism, the Daily Mail first reported.

The man at the center of the allegations, described as a divorced father named "Robert," told the outlet he spent $40,000 on her during a three-month relationship that began on dating app Hinge before discovering she had a profile on a website called Seeking, which markets itself as "a space where love and luxury meet."

He alleged that her Seeking profile was under the name "Alessia" and sought "mutually beneficial" relationships with "masculine men." Varvaro firmly denied the claims when questioned by the Daily Mail.

 

[KaraBulut]

Meet John Phelan. Mr Phelan gave nearly $900,000 to Trump's campaign. Mr Phelan owns an investment firm that is headquartered in Palm Beach, Florida.

That $900,000 bought him the Secretary of the Navy position in the Trump Administration!

Mr Phelan never served in the Navy. In fact, Mr Phelan has no military experience. Rumor has it that Mr Phelan may have had a boat when he was a young boy that he played with during bath time.

John Phelan, Trump donor, businessman with no prior military experience, poised to lead the Navy | Federal News Network

John Phelan, President Donald Trump's pick to lead the Navy, says his background makes him the right candidate to fix the issues that have plagued the service.

federalnewsnetwork.com

Mr Phelan was confirmed by the Senate on 24-Mar-2025. The vote was Yea-62, Nay-30.

So, Hegseth fired the Secretary of the Navy- the guy who got his job because he donated nearly $1 million to Trump's 2024 campaign.

https://www.cnn.com/2026/04/22/politics/john-phelan-navy-secretary-leaving

US Navy Secretary Phelan fired as naval blockade of Iran continues

Secretary of the Navy John Phelan was ousted from his position Wednesday, six sources familiar with the matter told CNN, amid tension with Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth over his implementation of shipbuilding reform and his close relationship with President Donald Trump.

Pentagon spokesman Sean Parnell said Wednesday evening that Phelan would be departing “effective immediately” — a surprise announcement that came even while the US Navy is carrying out a blockade of Iranian ports during a ceasefire in the Iran war. Earlier, Hegseth had a conversation with Trump and informed Phelan he needed to resign or be fired, two sources familiar with the matter said.

“President Trump and Secretary Hegseth agreed new leadership at the Navy is needed,” one of the sources, a senior administration official, told CNN.

 

[KaraBulut]

There's a group of animals that take up residence in nests and dens that were made by someone else.

In Jan, 2025 Trump fired the lesbian who was in charge of the Coast Guard. Admiral Linda Lee Fagan, a 40 year veteran of the Coast Guard, was originally told that she could remain in the Admiral's residence for 2 months. Instead, she was given 3 hours to vacate.

And guess who moved in? Rent-free!

https://thehill.com/homenews/administration/5455189-noem-rent-free-coast-guard/

The Coast Guard reports to DHS. Noem has not named a replacement to head up the Coast Guard... the longer the position remains unfilled, the longer Noem gets free housing in DC.

Pacific Heights, DHS edition.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/kristi-noem-coast-guard-home-fired-b2964344.html

Kristi Noem continues to live in Coast Guard home despite being fired as DHS secretary

Scandal-tainted former Homeland secretary has been spotted coming and going from the posh digs in Washington, D.C., in recent days, despite being ousted more than six weeks ago

Ousted Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem is still living in a military waterfront home typically designated for Coast Guard officials, despite being fired by President Donald Trump last month, according to a report.

Noem has been spotted coming and going from the home in Washington, D.C., in recent days and has continued to use the accommodation more than six weeks after her ouster, The Wall Street Journal reported.

The embattled former cabinet member moved onto the military base after protesters and paparazzi discovered the address of her private residences while she oversaw the Trump administration’s aggressive anti-immigration crackdown.

Noem’s top aide, Corey Lewandowski, has also been seen at the home over the past year and as recently as this month, people familiar with the matter told the Journal. The pair has been accused of engaging in an extramarital affair, which Noem and Lewandowski have blasted. Noem previously dismissed as “tabloid garbage.”

 

[rareboy]

^ She probably gets to live there after being named to that imaginary organization.

Grifters one and all.

 

[KaraBulut]

^ She probably gets to live there after being named to that imaginary organization.

Grifters one and all.

Corey Lewandowski, who was also fired from his temporary government job as the Chief of Staff to DHS, has been seen at the residence... coming and going, of course.

In addition to firing the Commandant of the Coast Guard last year and then kicking her and her partner out of their house, there is finally a new Commandant, Adm Kevin Lunday, who was nominated to the position in Oct, 2025 and finally confirmed by the Senate in Dec, 2025 on a voice vote.

Adm Lunday has been homeless for nearly 5 months because there's some woman using his house for a love shack.

Senate approves Adm. Lunday as Coast Guard commandant after flap over hate symbol policy

Coast Guard Adm. Kevin Lunday — whose nomination for commandant was temporarily held held up by lawmakers amid a political controversy about policy guidance related to hate symbols — was confirmed by the Senate Thursday night to lead the sea service on a more permanent basis.

defensescoop.com

 

[KaraBulut]

Forget Oz Pearlman, KKKaroline should have been hired as the mentalist for the dinner.

 

[rareboy]

Or she knew how they had set it up to have some nutter take a shot?