Untitled.

[GoodbyeSobriety]

Sorry to be blunt, but you cannot just sit and hope, how is anyone supposed to get to know you? My advice is go to gay clubs and bars. If you want to meet someone, you have to meet people.

 

[BrandonSBCA]

You're right, it is hard, but just look at all the people on this board who are partnered and have lovers in their life.

There is hope out there for everyone, even though it might take a while to find that special someone. You might even go through a lot of men to find that one that will be there for you, that will love you the way you want to be loved.

The only way you can change not being alone is by making a decision to go out and try your best to find someone, you might not be compatible with everyone but at least you made the effort.

 

[trawler69]

I agree with Brandon and Damind, you have to get out and meet people, If Gay clubs scare you then try a Gay bar of a Gay social club / meeting place. It's so easy to get into a spiral of depression that feeds on itself. Been there myself, in the end I forced myself to go to a meeting arranged by the local Gay switch board and that really helped, it was not about hooking up but just meeting people who were in a similar situation to myself. Good luck guys my thoughts are with you

 

[jetsonboy]

There are other ways to meet a potential mate than going to clubs and bars. You can use a dating service, for example. But the best way is to go out and make friends and spread the word that you are available (networking). See and meet and socialize as much as possible, and someday you will meet the love of your life, guaranteed.

 

[Aussieguy01]

I agree coz i know thats what im still looking for , im looking for a relationship first before i give myself and my body to a man ( im still a virgin ) and i hope that soon i will be able to have a relationship with a guy , i dont want one night stands

 

[ahotjock71]

All good things come to those of us who wait the longest.

 

[BoSoxFanVa]

From someone a little older; I too was a bit shy and didn't like going to the clubs all that much. But the bars did have one neat thing going for them, they sponsored gay sports such as softball, flag football, bowling, volleyball and even golf. Sports has always been an outlet for me, so I met some really awesome, quality guys. If sports aren't your thing, look for political groups. I also joined the Unitarian Church which is a big supporter of human and gay rights.

I'm back in the dating scene again, but this time I'm trying the internet dating sites such as Yahoo, Gay.com, and Plenty of Fish (this one is free).

Keep in mind that you're not alone. There are other guys out there just like you that are looking for a serious relationship.

Don't just sit back and let time pass. Take this from someone with some experience, you will never get back the time lost just sitting around waiting for someone to approach you. Be aggressive.

 

[hotcbr]

I'm not into the whole club scene much either (whether str8 or gay...most clubs are for hooking up)...so I tried Yahoo. I am SOOOOO lucky because one of the guys who responded to me was the one I thought was hottest and we've been together ever since in a monogamous, committed relationship...that was 3 1/2 years ago! Good luck! There are plenty of great guys out there who want the same thing as you. BoSoxFanVa is right, life is WAY too short to wait around

 

[mac_twck]

I am happy being gay but at the same time, I am sad being lonely. Why is it so hard to find a lover? I mean a "lover"..not a sex partner. If i so want sex, I coud just get to a gay bar...I've never ever been to a gay bar.

I confess that I die a little more and more inside when each day goes by...and I am still alone.

Being alone is the hardest part for me, being a gay.

It is not just gay men who want that someone special. Everyone, gay, straight, men, women, we all have that need to be loved for who we are.

I too feel my life ebbing slowly away....alone.

 

[SFMusic]

Finding a life partner is probably the strangest experience you can ever have, because their is no right way or wrong way to do it. However, there are things that you can do to increase your chances of finding the right guy.

-Don't sit at home waiting for him to find you. You could wind up waiting a lifetime for the perfect man, but he couldn't find you because you were at home.

-Go out and find some activities you enjoy that attract a lot of gay men. ie, a gay chorus, a gay sports team, season tickets to the opera!

-The more activities you participate in, the more interesting you will become, and you will be more likely to attract an interesting guy.

-Don't go looking for a husband! Just try to meet as many different guys as you can, as friends.

-Put an personal ad online. But you have to be very careful. Rarely is an online person "real". But it can happen. That's how I met my husband.

This is just a small sample of things you can do to be more pro-active in avoiding loneliness. Good luck in your search, and just remember you don't have to be lonely if you don't want to.