well i did it

[mikeiscool]

well i kinda came out today to my fam. basically i told my sister then my mom. i met a guy online and i've been texting him (actually just learned he's a jubber too) and he seems super cool. whether we'll just be friends or more i'm not sure yet. so we made plans to hang out on sat night. so i kinda just decided to tell my mom i was going out on sat night. and she asks why because i don't really do that much and i kinda just told her it was w/ a guy. basically my sister already knew which i figured she did. but my mom got all pissed and wondered why i never told her years ago when she asked. i said because i wasn't completely sure then. even now i'm not sure if i'm gay or bi. well she got all upset and won't talk to me. she even told my dad. i don't think he even cares that much except that it made my mom upset. so now i don't know what to do. i really thought she knew but i guess she just didn't want to accept it or something idk. so anyways, now i feel really guilty and ashamed and upset. but i was so happy earlier, even at work because i was texting this guy and like i said he is awesone. now i'm just totally bummed. i even told him i came out and he's been really cool. been texting him most of the night.

so i guess just looking for advice and whatnot.

thanks guys. sorry if i just rambled. and i'm sure the boy is going to read this

 

[KaraBulut]

but my mom got all pissed and wondered why i never told her years ago when she asked. i said because i wasn't completely sure then. even now i'm not sure if i'm gay or bi. well she got all upset and won't talk to me. ....now i feel really guilty and ashamed and upset.

Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. Acceptance.

You went through it when you came out. Now it's mom's turn.

You survived. She will too. Just be patient and don't get sucked into what she's going through.

 

[vamp]

She just needs time. Give her space and support. Her ill feelings will eventually blow over. Congratulations on coming out, it just sucks that your mom got upset. She'll get over it someday. Just give her patience, support, and space.

 

[Lube]

Awesome, Mike! Congratulations!

Don't worry, you'll feel better soon enough. And if your Mom asked you before, she must've known. She was just hoping you weren't. As Kara and vamp said, she'll get over it. Just give her time.

But it's really awesome that you're out. Yay! Celebrate! Huge load off your chest, isn't it? Scary, but invigorating.

 

[mikeiscool]

thanks boys for all the support! i probably did not do it at the best time but i guess its best i actually did it. otherwise i would have just kept lying and lying which probably would not have been great.

 

[Kyanimal]

thanks boys for all the support! i probably did not do it at the best time but i guess its best i actually did it. otherwise i would have just kept lying and lying which probably would not have been great.

Mike ...

I seriously doubt there is ever a "Best" time for coming out ... to Anybody ... let alone your family! The important thing here is that You did it, and now it's a "done deal"!!

Yes! It sounds like Mom needs some time to process this. But ... be assured that she will eventually find a way to "come to terms", in her own way. She's probably more "pissed" that she might think you were lying before, more than she's disappointed that You are now being YOU! Know what I mean?? I think she'll "come around", given a little bit of time!

I'm quite familiar with Cleveland (my family lives there), and the general thought processes/culture that you're living in/with. Just let me say ... there is far more to the Gay Community, in the area, than is apparent on the surface! You can now be more comfortable in the way you feel, and open yourself to all of the possibilities that are everywhere around you!

I am most sincere when I say ... no matter what ...

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz

 

[KaraBulut]

thanks boys for all the support! i probably did not do it at the best time but i guess its best i actually did it. otherwise i would have just kept lying and lying which probably would not have been great.

There is no "best" time.

In retrospect, as bumpy as the road will be for a while, it will be better than the lies and the closet. And eventually, your mom will realize that in order to be part of your life, she's going to have to accept your sexuality.

You did the right thing.

 

[SonOfSlobone]

I think it's interesting that your mom wasn't mad because you're gay, she's mad because you didn't tell her sooner. I have a feeling she'll get over that pretty quickly.

And yeah, congratulations. I wish I'd had that kind of courage when I was your age, it would have made my life a lot easier.

 

[mikeiscool]

hey. well my mom and i talked today and she is better about it but still a little frustrated because she's scared about me meeting someone from online which i told her im an adult and its my decision. if it turns out bad its my fault. but now my dad wants to talk tomorrow to me and idk what about. so we'll see. thanks boys.