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What do i do???

S

socalistud3

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ok i am going to try and make this as short as possible

i am 20 the guy i like is 30...age to me means nothing...anyways...to the point

so i felt something for him a while back...i told only one friend, and then all of a sudden he broke up with his girlfriend and asked me out...ya thats right i said girlfriend...i was shocked too...i thought that he was yanking my chain...anyways he says he wants to take me out...i say no...he then says that he really wants to and i was all...you don't settle down with anyone you just move from person to person...anyways he says maybe i am the one to change him...i start texting him because i think it could happen...we text for a few days...then all of a sudden he stops and people start talking about it at work...(oh ya by the way we work together)...i back off and do nothing...his girlfriend and him get back together like usual...they break up weekly or bi weekly...anyways....she starts getting pissed at me about all of it...anyways he sticks up for me...and i just freeze him out....

we text again just recently the other day and i tell him how i feel and not to toy with my feelings cause they are real...he says that he is just confused...about what i ask...he doesn't answer...i try and talk to him and nothing happens...he avoids it or won't answer...

i have no clue if he is toying with me and just is feeding off of this and its funny to him...is it just a manly ego thing or could i possibly be the first guy he has wanted to be with and he is scared...i dont know what to do...help me plase

HELP
 
Walk away. If i guy is really interested in you. He won't resort to playing this game of "on again", "off again" behavior. I know you like this guy and it's going to be tough but walk away now. Trust me, I've been there. I'm saving you alot of heartbreak. Maybe one day when he gets his shit together and figures out what he wants in life...then maybe you guys will be together...who knows. Life's too short to be chasing a guy who doesn't love you 100% back!
 
I agree, walk away, these are not the sort of games that start solid relationships, added to the fact he works with you, never a good start imo, I would put this one off and look for another guy!
 
He needs to figure things out for himself.

I don't know about you, but I'm not going to be the guy who helps anyone else figure things out. Been there, done that. It has never worked-out.

Move along and find someone who is in to you and is available.
 
Total guess here, but I have a feeling you don't interest him so much as excite him. You may be sort of his sexual fantasy - something that it's exciting to think about, dream about, and maybe even scheme about. But when it comes to put up or shut up, he gets cold feet. After all, most sexual fantasies are all about the here and now - something new, refreshing and exciting. And they rarely have a "and then we started a long meaningful relationship" tacked on to the end.

Like I said, a total guess. But it might explain why he's playing footsie with you but keeps going back to his girlfriend. And if I'm right, he'll probably only be interested up until orgasm hits. At that point, you may no longer interest him.

Something to mull over.

Lex
 
Also...don't believe everything you see in the movies! ;) Life hardly ever has happy endings. Just a fact! Good luck!
 
Personally, I would keep my distance from him.

I have a gay friend who breaks up with his boyfriend about once a week, or so it seems. Each of them are codependent on the other for something; one for money and one for the youth of the other and what it brings to their bedroom.

From experience, someone who breaks up like the guy about whom you speak probably will be doing the same with you if you choose to pursue a relationship. Since I came out I find that I don't do anything but date guys immediately after they break up with someone. I wait and I make them wait for anything beyond going out to a movie or talking. I don't want to be the "rebound" guy. I also don't want to be hurt if they make the decision to get back together with the person that they just left.

My suggestion is that you do the same. Tell him you'd be happy to talk; go out for a drink; but I'd keep some distance.
 
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