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what would you think of this guy?

Use your energy elsewhere.
 
Maybe it's just a shy person who has cold feet. He may actually be very interested, but could be new to this sort of thing. Don't ignore him completely; just wait an let him initiate anything even just a conversation. If he does, then he definitely is interested in meeting. Shy people just need a little more patience.
 
If you really feel a connection with him over the phone and think about him all the time, I wouldn't give up on him just yet. He could have a self confidence issue or maybe he's afraid you won't be attracted to him. If all you want is a quick hook up, like others have said, forget him.
I'm speaking from experience. I met this guy on a chat line seven years ago. After much coaxing, he finally gave me his phone number. We talked on and off for TWO YEARS. I wanted to meet him from the beginning but he never would meet me. I had other hookups in the meantime but I'd always wish I was with him. FINALLY, he put a picture of himself in my mailbox. He looked different than I had imagined all that time but I had fallen in love with his heart, not his body. Soon thereafter he finally agreed to meet me.
We have been together ever since. We have a monogamous relationship and love each other dearly. I'm glad I didn't give up on him and he is too.

Patience is a virtue. And sadly, rarely found in the gay community.
 
Give him one more chance. Try just telling him the truth: I'm still interested in meeting you, but it sounds like you're not so much. I need to set up a definite time and place, or I'm going to have to move on. I like you, but I'm really looking for something more than an Internet relationship right now.
 
loki81 said:
I have 3 dates this week, so it's not like I'm pining away waiting for the phone to ring ;)
Click to expand...

Does he have any idea you date that much? Maybe that is what is scaring him off. Maybe he is afraid that you are much more experienced than he is and thinks your expectations of him are going to be way high.
 
"Being tired" is such a lazy ass excuse, literally. If the guy had an actual interest in meeting you, he would make a conscious effort to do so. Time to move on.
 
loki81 said:
so, I'm 95% certain I've reached the "fuck it and ignore him" stage, but I was a little curious if my fellow JUB'ers might have any insight into wtf could be going on in his head.

so, there's this guy... we met on okcupid. we were messaging back and forth and everything seems to be going well, escalated into texting/talking, but every time I suggest that we should meet up, the conversation goes something like:

me: hey, we should totally grab coffee one of these days or just hang out.
him: yes, definitely!
me: let me know what your schedule is like. I'm usually free all day on Friday/Saturday and out of work by 7 pm the rest of the week.
him: cool.

followed by messages that have absolutely nothing to do with getting together :confused:

we were actually really close to hanging out once (re: hooking up, but I'm ok with that), but at the last minute he said he was tired and would be lousy company, but he'd be free the next week (followed a few days later by another one of the conversations illustrated above).

like I said, I'm pretty much done with this guy. it's just not worth the effort at this point, even if he is super cute and we have tons in common and he's pretty much exactly my type to a t, but I'm a little befuddled at what could be going on in his mind.

I'd think that if he was just flat out uninterested, he wouldn't be messaging me and responding to my messages... but if he is interested, how hard is it for an unemployed guy to find a few free hours?
Click to expand...

I'd say the ball is in his court. Let him contact you and set up a meeting. If not, then, move on.
 
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