When is a straight guy bi, and what's the difference between tastes and selfishness?

[transient]

I have what is probably a minority view that our sexual orientation is defined entirely by our willing and intended behaviours, and that nothing else to do with "identity" really matters or makes any sense.

So, this theoretical guy in your example: if he has been happy to have sex with women, but now he wants to try it with a guy, he can call himself a bi-curious straight guy. If he likes it enough that he wants to go back for more, he's bi. If he likes it so much that he never wants to sleep with a woman ever again because this is so much better than he expected, then, ladies and gentlemen, we have ourselves a gay.

And if that guy wants to sleep with another guy, but does nothing to ensure the other guy has a good time, he's just a selfish gay guy. A gay guy with a kinky fetish for pretending he's straight. But he is not actually straight any more than I was Superman that night with the cape and the pineapp---never mind.

How people feel about their behaviours doesn't matter; it's what they choose to do that makes a difference. And if a guy chooses to have sexual contact with another guy, he is bi or gay. There is one exception, but it's temporary. If he tries it, and doesn't like it, and doesn't want to try it again, he can go back to being straight.

Well said.