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Why does it feel more betrayed if the person cheats with a person of their own sex (if straight) or opposite sex (if gay)? Isn't it just infedelty?

I suspect that would depend on the person, and what their definition of infidelity might be. I suppose if a woman was "more" betrayed by a gay affair, perhaps she not only feels lied to, she feels LIED to?
 
LandSome80 said:
Why does it feel more betrayed if the person cheats with a person of their own sex (if straight) or opposite sex (if gay)? Isn't it just infedelty?
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I don't know that this statement is always true.

If we're talking about a married couple, any affair can be devastating because it can trigger all sorts of questions about the basic assumptions of the relationship. And there's a big difference between "cheating" and an "affair".

If anyone- male or female- finds out that the person they're in a relationship with is emotionally involved in an affair, it's rough.

The only difference between a same-sex couple and a opposite-sex couple are the assumptions. Usually, straight couples assume that fidelity is part of the committed relationship. With same-sex couples, there's more room for negotiation. If the couple has made a commitment to be monogamous, then the breaking of that promise is going to be rough, no matter whether it's a straight couple or a gay couple.

To refute the basic assumptions of your subject, I can tell you that one of the ugliest break-ups that I've never seen was a straight couple who had an arrangement that they both could have one-night stands with a same sex partner, as long as they were honest about it. That meant she was free to have sex with women; he was free to have sex with guys. What finally blew up their relationship was when one of them was caught having an affair with an opposite sex friend. It was not only a major betrayal for them, the fact that it was a friend, an affair and a broken agreement blew up the relationship. Their relationship never recovered and they went their separate ways.
 
The answer I've usually heard from straight women in these situations is that they feel like they can't compete against a guy. Dressing sexier, being more feminine doesn't do any good. So I suppose the same holds true for gay couples.

Its like you're playing a game and following the rules and suddenly the rules change and you're left out in the cold and there's nothing you can do about it.
 
Riverrick said:
The answer I've usually heard from straight women in these situations is that they feel like they can't compete against a guy. Dressing sexier, being more feminine doesn't do any good. So I suppose the same holds true for gay couples.

Its like you're playing a game and following the rules and suddenly the rules change and you're left out in the cold and there's nothing you can do about it.
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exactly my idea!
 
I've honestly never heard a woman say that they "can't compete." The only thing I've ever seen was the girl feeling doubly lied to and being furious. The one exception was a girl who married a gay guy with full knowledge - never understood why - then got cheated on and was mostly angry that she didn't get a whole lot of sympathy.
 
TX-Beau said:
I've honestly never heard a woman say that they "can't compete." The only thing I've ever seen was the girl feeling doubly lied to and being furious. The one exception was a girl who married a gay guy with full knowledge - never understood why - then got cheated on and was mostly angry that she didn't get a whole lot of sympathy.
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i doubt they will talk about it but I hearded it, just i don't think is something you'll be able to heard from them
 
Dehu said:
Cheating is cheap no matter straight or gay
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Opposite sex would be much worse in my case assuming I am in a relationship with him.

I only want 100% homosexual men as mates with no exceptions. Fucking a woman would be a deal breaker.

Fucking another man wouldn't bother me as much if he is honest about it.
 
LandSome80 said:
I ever wondered this.
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Yes, cheating is cheating. I dated a bi guy and eventhough I didn't think much about him cheating with a female him cheating with a guy pissed me off. But yeah, regardless of how the other person identifiers still cheating.
 
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