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Working on inner feelings

bhandsome

bhandsome

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Lately I have been thinking about the possibilities of me being gay/bi and its still confusing. I'm 19, in college and too anxious and scared to even think about being gay.

Those who are close to me have all said they don't have a problem with their friend/best friend being gay, including my mother; not knowing i was curious and trying to discover my sexuality. This brings stress off alot. Although when they ask me if there is a special girl in my life or when I have kids, I feel like I'm lying to them and myself.

I don't know what I am, just a sexually frustrated virgin who has never been kissed and I just don't know. plain and simple. when i think about having sex with girls i think i wont be able to "get it up".

For those who I have followed my post in the past, I like gay porn, straight porn every now and then, and majority of you on here believe "I am gay" and that does nothing for me....

Honestly I'm trying to not to think about it and I have plenty of activities to keep my occupied, but the thought always come to mind when people ask about girlfriends, sex with girls, and when I watch porn....can't really escape the pressure.
 
i appreciate your advice, i'll be sure to use it to my advantage
 
Yea, id have to agree with what stacy said above...

Lay off the porn for awhile and just go with the flow...see who or what catches your eye in lecture, in your dorm, etc... and work from there.
 
A close friend of mine went through a similar thing. People kept asking him about girls and dating and other hetero stuff. And the poor guy, always get awkward and speechless when people asked him questions like those.

And what I told him was that: you either make a good case why you're not dating a girl or make a joke out of the whole situation OR you can just tell people the truth.

I believe if you don't find a way to settle your situation, it will continue to nag you for the rest of your life.
 
true.

i usually tell people "no" or "that my personal philosophy is whatever happens, happens"

i'm trying to deal, just need to learn how too
 
bhandsome said:
Honestly I'm trying to not to think about it and I have plenty of activities to keep my occupied, but the thought always come to mind when people ask about girlfriends, sex with girls, and when I watch porn....can't really escape the pressure.
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The only person who is pressuring you is yourself.

And as long as you have this analysis-paralysis over whether you're gay or bi or whatever, it's a great excuse not to live your life and come to a resolution.

19 is still young. But at some point, you have to get out there and find some of the answers. It may be that you're a BUG (Bi until graduation) or you could be gay as a goose. But the only thing that's certain is that all this pressure you're putting upon yourself isn't helping.
 
KaraBulut said:
The only person who is pressuring you is yourself.

And as long as you have this analysis-paralysis over whether you're gay or bi or whatever, it's a great excuse not to live your life and come to a resolution.

19 is still young. But at some point, you have to get out there and find some of the answers. It may be that you're a BUG (Bi until graduation) or you could be gay as a goose. But the only thing that's certain is that all this pressure you're putting upon yourself isn't helping.
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your absolutely right, but i have always been one to worry and i'm still learning to not worry so much.

i have been thinking of just go with the flow and enjoy my life and at some point, hopefully before i graduate, i will find out who i truly am.
 
bhandsome said:
anyone else have anything they want to add?
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I dunno, I kinda think you answered your own question:

bhandsome said:
Although when they ask me if there is a special girl in my life or when I have kids, I feel like I'm lying to them and myself.

... when i think about having sex with girls i think i wont be able to "get it up".
Click to expand...

What other questions do you have?
 
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