21 This year

[LadyMontage]

I'll be 21 this year and I'm still a virgin, I've fooled around with a couple guys (blow jobs, i've been rimmed, etc.) but, I've felt that I wasn't ready, even now. Is that normal? I think I've just wanted to find someone that I would be sexually compatible with in every aspect as I've been cheated on multiple times. I want to know what everyone else thinks on this? Am I doing something wrong? Are there still guys out there who will accept a virgin even at the age of 21? Thank you.

~XO

 

[looseliam]

You're not doing anything wrong at all. I have met great guys, older than you, who were still virgins. For me it's a non-issue.

You'll know when you're ready.

Don't let anyone dictate your values!!

 

[Rand]

Lady M,

I agree. You know, the first time only happens once! Let it be special with the person you want. There is no time time table. Do celebrate your life!

 

[Anders123]

I'm 21 in a few months myself, and though I've had sex with girlfriends in the past, I consider myself a virgin and don't plan on giving it away easily.

Having sex casually is fine, waiting for someone special is fine, too.

You're doing absolutely nothing wrong (as far as I know ), and anyone who would turn someone away purely because they are sexually inexperienced isn't worth your time anyway, in my opinion.

It's perfectly normal

 

[thermodynamics]

I'm still a virgin at 26. I haven't been trying to "save myself", it's just happened that way. I'm a hopelessly romantic introvert. I know I can't handle casual sex, so I haven't engaged in it. I can't wait to find a cute, sweet guy, fall in love, and get married.

 

[Seasoned]

Frankly, I'd like us to drop the term virgin from our vocabulary. It congers up such heterosexual, biblical and medieval sexual/political/legal notions regarding the vagina/birthright and sin.

Some gays enjoy anal, others do not. Some follow the stereotypical straight female model wanting it to be romantic and emotionally connected the first time, others just want to get it over with.

I personally think it's limiting for gays to buy into the heterosexual model. That model dismisses the entire notion of versatility.

Since there is no hymen in the behind nor any potential of pregnancy what is the consequential difference of taking/giving it there as opposed to the mouth?

Inexperience is another matter and mostly in gay situations it's a turn on to be the first. My partner was very experienced (the slut) yet it was a great turn on for both of us when I became the first at a particular act.

When you're gay there are just too many ways to apply the word virgin-and, too me, none of them are useful. I think the best thing to do is to relax, communicate with a partner, have fun and try not to do anything that leads to regret afterwards.

Celebrate being gay and remember, by your own defintion, there's the "virgin" top as well as the "virgin" bottom, and that is why I prefer using the term "first time."

Climbs down from soapbox to head to shower.


I hope this leaves you less rather than more anxious. If not, please pm me and I will make amends. Good luck to you.

 

[Gaslight]

I'll be 21 this year and I'm still a virgin, I've fooled around with a couple guys (blow jobs, i've been rimmed, etc.) but, I've felt that I wasn't ready, even now. Is that normal? I think I've just wanted to find someone that I would be sexually compatible with in every aspect as I've been cheated on multiple times. I want to know what everyone else thinks on this? Am I doing something wrong? Are there still guys out there who will accept a virgin even at the age of 21? Thank you.

~XO

I'm twenty two myself and I'm still a virgin as well. I've been cheated on before and it's really difficult to deal with sometimes. You're normal and don't believe otherwise! I think guys will be completely be able to understand and accept you because you're not alone in feeling that way.

 

[LadyMontage]

I appreciate all of your kind words and opinions on this matter. soreknees I understand what you are saying in your post. However, I do in fact take on the heterosexual act of being much more a female. I believe sex should only be done in the act of love and nothing more. I myself have been in love only twice out of the many men I've dated. Fortunately I figure the right guy will eventually come along who I believe deserves that portion of me. I like to consider myself a heterosexual female, as such I look more for love and affection than physical. That can of course cause a problem in the homosexual community because I'm far different from your average "fem". We'll just stick to "FemFatale" for me.

 

[Seasoned]

I appreciate all of your kind words and opinions on this matter. soreknees I understand what you are saying in your post. However, I do in fact take on the heterosexual act of being much more a female. I believe sex should only be done in the act of love and nothing more. I myself have been in love only twice out of the many men I've dated. Fortunately I figure the right guy will eventually come along who I believe deserves that portion of me. I like to consider myself a heterosexual female, as such I look more for love and affection than physical. That can of course cause a problem in the homosexual community because I'm far different from your average "fem". We'll just stick to "FemFatale" for me.

Well, that's the beauty of being gay. We can each make our own way. I'm happy you understood where I was coming from. I post and reply from my experience which includes being married to a woman and having two children. It is always my intention to be honest and to be respectful.

You seem to be very comfortable in your skin and that is what I wish for every reader here. I'm so happy that with the internet no one has to be isolated. The gay tent is huge and although every gay person may not be comfortable with every other gay person we can all support each other as long as no one is being hurt.

Good luck to you. You seem sweet.

 

[LadyMontage]

Well, that's the beauty of being gay. We can each make our own way. I'm happy you understood where I was coming from. I post and reply from my experience which includes being married to a woman and having two children. It is always my intention to be honest and to be respectful.

You seem to be very comfortable in your skin and that is what I wish for every reader here. I'm so happy that with the internet no one has to be isolated. The gay tent is huge and although every gay person may not be comfortable with every other gay person we can all support each other as long as no one is being hurt.

Good luck to you. You seem sweet.

Thank you for recognizing my stand point as well and where I am coming from with my frame of mind. It seems people, even in the gay community (most) cannot accept someone different than their standards or what they're looking for. I accept everyone for who they are, whether or not I agree with their lifestyles.

I am very comfortable in my skin and have a great sense of communication, which some may come to see in me down the road here. If I have something I wish to say I'm not going to be afraid to say it, though I will do it in the utmost respect and well behaved manor. I may be 20 but, I have the mind of someone twice my age.