A big question: how do you get a date?

[nightmale]

I have dated many people through the Internet and/or in the real world, and I find Internet dating is very frustrating. Most people I've met on the net are game players--they like to play cat and mouse. Oftentimes you find that after doing all sorts of stuff, such as swapping pics, emails, text messages, meeting for coffee or even getting laid...they simply disappear, never returning your calls or text messages anymore.

Guys from the net seem to have more attitude, more cautious, and more defensive. I do believe that the attitude comes from insecurities and vulnerabilites. Guys are really afraid to be hurt and so they form this fortress surrounding themselves to protect themselves.

I think discovering the one in my workplace, in the real world is more reliable, more real and trustworthy.

So, I'd like to hear your guys' experience. Did you find your special someone through the net???

 

[Corny]

get out! meet real people!
as for internet dating - yes it works, too. but you should try and meet people asap if you like them. when you exchanged a few messages and think you might come along well - meet. the net is good for finding people. but dating happens in the real world

 

[rareboy]

Stick to the real world.

 

[SilverRRCloud]

get out! meet real people!
as for internet dating - yes it works, too. but you should try and meet people asap if you like them. when you exchanged a few messages and think you might come along well - meet. the net is good for finding people. but dating happens in the real world

A very good point.

Net does work, no doubt about it. However, just like in real life, few rules do apply.

One of them is to get out of the cyber as soon as possible. Sure, few mails, couple of pix and a real life meet up (preferably in a public place). Dudes, who need months and weeks to meet up, coz they are 'busy', 'not sure', 'do not really know', etc. are usually a waste of your good time.

SC

 

[G-Lexington]

Internet hook-ups, in many ways, are like the "truck stop" of the present. A lot of furtive "no one must know" sorts of get-togethers, a place to indulge some quirks or fantasies with like-minded individuals, a spot where the "bi-curious" can decide exactly how "curious" they are. I'm not deriding it - just defining it. Note there's no mention of "finding a great guy to start a relationship with" in the equation.

I DO think one can find an LTR online (I did, my brother did), but you'll have to go to the right spots. Craigslist ain't the way. You gotta hit a "male looking for male, friendship possible LTR" type sites. Basically, if you need to list your dick size, or what you're into sexually immediately, you're in "hookup" territory rather than relationship territory.

Real world? Harder, more nerve-wracking but usually more likely to result in "boyfriend" rather than "hook-up".

Careful about dating within your workforce, however. It's tough if it doesn't work out and you gotta see the guy every day.

Lex

 

[landers]

There's nothing wrong with using the internet to find someone to date, as long as you use a reputable site. But ideally the way it should work is a couple of emails exchanged followed by a coffee date, to make sure that the person you've been talking to online hasn't lied about their appearance or anything like that. After the initial coffee you can decide whether or not you want to get to know this person better or never speak to them again. I also like to have a friend call me about 30min into the date with an "emergency" just in case it's going really badly and I need to get out of there.

I met a great guy online and I couldn't be happier right now.

 

[syntax]

A smaller question to informed responders: What are the "right" and "reputable" dating sites?

 

[M4P]

My partner and I were first introduced in a gay bar by mutual friends