A coaster park trip

[chrisdobro]

a local gay bar organized a trip to a roller coaster park on gay day. I got two tickets for me and my partner, but then he didn't want to go.

So I had an extra ticket, and refund was hard to get. There was a way to resell the ticket, but it was unknown if I could do that, so I found a guy from my GSA group who could go.

I rarely get a chance to hang out with groups of guys, so I was very excited !! When we got to the park, it turned out he was scared of coasters that went too fast and that went upside down ... So I had a choice ot make -- do I go on the speed coaster with the group of hot guys !! and have fun or do I go find a slow mom and pop's coaster to ride with him ? I figure I'd go with hot guys. So I did and it was awesome !! In the mean time he went by himself and rode a small coaster.

Then we met up again and went to the 2nd coaster. Again, he said he said he couldn't ride it. Again I had a choice to make. And what I did then still appalls me now. I've decided to abandon the hot and fun group of guys and stick with him. I felt I had to do that because I invited him. Just for a mental picture, the group of guys was a regular club party going crowd at the bar so it was hot young guys of college age. Just the ones I am dying for. And the guy I came with was not much to look at. He was clean, but he looked like a hippy with long scraggly hair. Long as in below shoulder length and everywhere.

So I was disappointed yet held myself well then still managed to have fun at the park. He said I didn't have to do that, but I felt I kinda had to as I invited him. Eventually we found another part of the group of party-goes who was also riding slow coasters. Too bad that was almost at the end of the day. Too bad the trip was organized but the slow/fast groups were not organized for. Everybody kinda went their own way in their own group.

So I was pretty much okay after the trip was done. Later, my partner tells me that why didn't I just keep riding coasters with the hot guys and leave my invitee to fend for himself ? I didn't have to stay there for him and baby him and ride slow coasters with him at my expense. Now that just opened up everything for me.

I was really pissed at myself for the choice I made to stick with the guy I invited. Some can say I shouldn't be pissed. I had fun anyway and was okay until my partner said something. And that I should defend my point and say Hey, I still had fun even though I've made a bad choice. And was it a bad choice really ? Maybe it was the right choice at the time...

Still, even though I had fun, it was a big downer for me to give up the group. What I want to take out of this post is ... if something like this happens again, do I abandon people I invited and pursue my own interests or do I stick by them even though it's not fun for me and I don't really have an obligation to do it ? or it depends ?

 

[antdak]

ummm doing the right thing really sucks!! Sorry your shallowness did not kick in stronger so you could have a much funner time with the hot guys! Pity!

 

[timnmostud]

You invited the guy and you are wanting to know if you should have abandoned him for your own pleasure since you found hotter more fun guys to hang out with than him? Obviously, Miss Manners would be a BIG help to you! Grab one of her books and read up! His saying that it was fine was his way of being polite to you. Some people have the good manners to be nice even when things aren't going their way only. It's really a bitch when doing the right thing gets in one's way of only being concerned for ones's self!

 

[G-Lexington]

You had absolutely no obligation to stick by him.

He accepted tickets to an amusement park. It's a given that at an amusement park, there will be fast and scary rides. The guy who took the ticket KNEW that was coming. And it would appear that he knew this - he told you a couple times that you didn't have to abandon the group to stay with him. It was very nice that you stuck with him, but you were under no obligation to him. He could've waited at the end of the coaster and picked up with you at the end of each ride.

This actually HAS happened to me. Not precisely the same thing, but very similar. A bunch of us went to an amusement park. One of our group didn't want to go on anything - not because he was scared (this guy was a friggin' ninja), but because he had just broken up with his long-time girlfriend and was depressed. I chose to detach myself from the main group and hang out with him. We didn't do much - shooting gallery, watched the bird show, things like that. But I think he appreciated the company. And I certainly didn't mind doing it. The weird thing - a couple people in our group got on OUR asses for not going on anything! They felt we should've given our tickets to someone who would've "gotten better use out of them". (My response - "Fuck that." )

Lex

 

[StlKj]

How strange relationships are today when one's partner gives him crap about not going to hang out with horny hot guys all day long, but instead politely hanging with a less attractive person who there would be no chance of anything happening with.

 

[backpacker]

Sounds like you and your partner are a perfect match. I guess in the future it would be best to tell the person accepting the spare ticket what is expected. He should have also warned you that he doesn't ride the fast rides before accepting your ticket. Given that nothing was agreed upon up front, you actually did the right thing. Live and learn.

 

[county]

You offerred the invitation to your 'not much to look at' GSA acquaintance. You described it well with ' disappointed... and pissed at myself'. You can most certainly improve on your behavior and attitude toward others. Quite frankly it is no wonder your partner chose not to go with you. Get over the pretty boy prima donna attitude, reread your post and evaluate your shallowness.

 

[luminum]

Personally, I would have done what you did. You invited him, he was your guest.

At the same time, you're both adults and he certainly shouldn't feel offended that you're going on the big scary roller coasters, so long as you're not entirely up and ditching him.

I get scared on big roller coasters, so when I go with my friends, I usually just wait for them and go on a different ride with them. It's cool and they have fun and I know we're all still having a good time together.

I'm not going to judge you, but I think you made the right choice, but you also need to trust that he's not going to need you to keep him entertained. If that situation ever arises again, just go on the rides, but keep him included in the time in between. I seem to recall a significant amount of time just walking around theme parks together.

 

[chrisdobro]

thanks. Quite different responses here. I guess there was some sort of obligation for me to take reasonable care of him since I invited him, especially since he was a nice guy and not an asshole. That doesn't mean I had to stick with him, but I needed to treat the situation with care. At the time I happened to stick with him as I didn't see other ways of handling it then.

Another way for example could be this -- at the end of the trip it so happened that me and my acquaintance joined the group of the organizer of the trip. That group also happened to ride slow rides as I think I've mentioned. If this happened again, I'd call up the organizer, find out where he was, send my friend to him, while keep riding the rides with the boys. The problem was that I didn't know that organizer's group was into slow rides too. I guess since now I'll just plan things better or go by myself.

The guy I was with was not exactly my acquaintance, he's closer to a friend, yet we don't see each other much, especially that the school's out.

 

[bluedragon4]

I like how you bf has an opinion about ditching someone after he left you holding the bag! Obviously ditching someone is ok in his book so asking him won't get you a decent persons answer.

 

[Riverrick]

We all have those gutwrenching dilemmas occur that ruin plans for us. All in all, I think you were better with sticking with your integrity. It would have bugged you later if you had not.