A Hairy Gnome Companion: Lawn Decorum And Vacuum Tales

[DonQuixote]

Lefty,
Well, I get a pass.
I must have clicked on this on the big day then had to get moving, but the "Read" indicator was off - so, I didn't know there was all of this e-mail fun and frolic to feast on!

 

[Lefty]

wassa read indicator?

 

[DonQuixote]

Subscriptions - when there's a new post, your subscriptions are BOLD.

When you've opened them up, after a new post, they go back to normal.

Sometimes PC resets the cookies and you stop seeing the new post bold.

 

[Lefty]

shit

eye nude that

thunked mighten be

sumpin to go with my

new jock..

(btw, I got a story for you there

 

[Lefty]

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America ,​

Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as "HILLBILLIES."​

You must now refer to them as​

APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS​

And furthermore​

​

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:​

​

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a"BREASTED AMERICAN."​

​

2. She is not "EASY" - She is​

"HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."​

​

3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a​

"LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."​

​

4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a​

"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."​

​

=0 A​

5. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes​

"VERBALLY REPETITIVE."​

​

6.. She is not a "TWO- BIT HOOKER" - She is a​

"LOW COST PROVIDER."​

​

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:​

​

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a​

"LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."​

​

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is​

"OVERLY CAUCASIAN."​

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He​

"INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."​

​

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in​

"FOLLICLE REGRESSION."​

​

5. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of​

"RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."​

(Loved this one!)​

​

6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's​

"REAR CLEAVAGE."​

questions?

 

[DonQuixote]

Oh, Lefty,
Those might get you banned.
You know all the guys on here are buff,
and would NEVER dream of exposing their
Rear Cleavage.

 

[Lefty]

No way that could even be a consideration.

Any moron could see I was performing a

resuscitation effort on an almost dead thread.


I should get a medal for A NOBLE EFFORT.

 

[DonQuixote]

I do not disagree with thee.
Just poking a wee bit o' fun.
(I've looked in the mirror, hun. - While I'm not apt to show my crack, a buff stud would not likely be the words used to describe me.)

 

[Lefty]

Of course I knew that....

butt,

I ain't never gonna pass a chance for

a smartassed remark.

 

[Lefty]

My name is Isaac Hung and I want to know which of you music

hating bastards stole my piano when I was on snacks break

 

[DonQuixote]

Oh, Lefty,
You've GOT to post that over in Isaac's Bunny Thread.

Too Precious!

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

that's adorable lol

 

[DonQuixote]

For those of you up to some rather strange fun and frolic, I invite you to explore our love fest.