Wednesday 10 July 2008
Fact of the day: the Iranians are bat-shit crazy
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Todays’s news is reporting some worrying developments in the Middle East, with Iran test-firing a battery of long-range missiles this morning and yesterday, for “just in case.” Do the citizens of the world honestly need to be continuously held to ransom on pseudo-religious grounds? Have we not moved on from King Richard and the Crusades? Really?
I finally got around to having drinks with Colin last night. Quite unremarkable, really – we hit the Comic Strip just after happy hour and then stayed for a while before heading up the road to Marvel and danced and hung out and stuff there. It’s not often we head out and about in town, the guys and I, preferring to stay rooted out in The North closer to home and go to Durbanville, or head significantly further South and to the usual UCT haunts like The Naut, The Pig, The Ruby and so on instead of hitting the middle of the city. But I do quite enjoy town. It’s quite a different vibe, and the crowd is a little older and more sophisticated. Ooh, get me being all hoity toity about where I go boozing. It’s true, though – the South is very much chock-full of upper-class out-of-town undergrads spending Mom and Dad’s money while at varsity and whose aim still seems to be to get as drunk as possible as quickly as possible and as cheaply as possible, and to stay that way for as long as possible. Town is more people who are actually going to remember significant chunks of their night out, and who probably won’t be washing vomit out of their t-shirts and/or jeans today, and not wondering where they left their other shoe. I’m not judging; but I do wonder at which point the mental adjustment occurs and the end-point shifts from getting completely pissed and becomes a slightly elevated level of enjoyment. I sincerely hope it happens with us soon; I’m kinda over the getting-plastered-every-night thing.
Anyway, I’ve mentioned before that I thought Colin might be gay, but I’ve also mentioned before that my gaydar is horrendous. I was kinda hoping he’d be blatant about it and suggest we meet at one of the bars in the Pink Quarter, but nope. I’m not sure if I should just tell him my story – I mean, I have to tell SOMEONE at some point, right? – and see if he goes along with it, or just play it out. I’m also in two minds as to what I’d get out of knowing he was like me. Let’s say he is and we find out about each other – so what? Is that first prize for this part, just getting it out of me? I like to believe that, but is it true? Or do I really want to tell him in particular because I hope he will then invite me to his bed? A nice idea, perhaps, but just because we both like boys doesn’t mean we’d immediately have the s3x with each other, although I’d be lying if I said I haven’t toyed with the idea, and that scenarios in the er… “art-house” films from pay-sites on the interwebz want me to think that is exactly how it would play out, complete with terrible and poorly-translated dialogue and large, uncircumcised penises. Would I say yes if he did? I’d like to say that I would decline because it would complicate things, but I think I probably would let him loose on me and then stress about it afterwards. Am I his type? Is he my type? Apart from us being honest with each other, why should I expect anything else? This is a dilemma, and no mistake. And if I out myself, will he keep it under his hat? If not, will it matter if he tells the rest of D&C? I’m tempted to say I want people to know, but what if it’s an issue? Of course this can be applied to all areas of my life, but… am I making too big a deal of this?
You know, I’ve never been a fan of the loud/proud/OTT queeny types, but at the same time I am filled with admiration that they can live with that huge “fuck ‘em all” attitude and just be themselves without letting the rest of the world get to them. Will I ever be that brave, Diary? I hate to say it, but I don’t think I will.
Either way, I’m still not sure that Colin isn’t straight. Furtive glances in the locker room at your neighbour’s junk doesn’t tell you much; according to Men’s Health, everyone looks, especially the heteros, and often involuntarily. I tried the other trick while we were out, which is watching what he watches when a hot guy or girl passes, but I didn’t get any concrete data from that, either. I suppose one’s type plays a role in that, and if nobody who is his type comes past then the whole thing is a washout.
Still, homo or otherwise he’s a nice guy, Colin, and I need to make more of an effort to solidify our friendship. Six months on from starting varsity and I seem to have mostly new acquaintances as opposed to proper new friends, and that’s my fault. Varsity Trevor, Paolo and Colin and the rest of D&C, my super-sexy Antony… all seem keen to be mates with me but I reckon I’ve come on far too dilute and I need to change that. According to many films I’ve seen, this is supposed to be the time of my life. So I supposed I’d better get on with it, and I texted Antony and we’re going to grab a drink later on this evening. Apart from his drunkenly groping my arse at his party those few weeks ago – and I’m still sure sure sure he did, hey – I’ve no reason to think he’s anything other than straight.
*sigh* etc.
-C
<--- used ironically; I don’t do smileys.
We've got to push C. a little harder to pop that "whatever" he has in there, screaming to be used. He has a chance now with Marcus. I hope he doesn't blow it........or maybe that's exactly what he should do.
