A question to single gays and those in a Relationship

[Jory]

To the single gays
Do you ever get tired of going to a bar, party or whatever and someone ask if you have a boyfriend in which you honestly answer no. And they reply "Why not?" As if there is something wrong with you.



To those in a relationship why do you do that to us? We are already lonely and bitter why make us feel worse?

 

[josher]

Because in the contemporary world, everyone feels empowered to ask stupid and/or annoying personal questions of everyone else. If I were you, I'd reply, "Why do you ask?"

 

[Eagle653]

If I were you, I'd reply, "Why do you ask?"

Exactly. Four simple words will put an end to that quickly.

You know, I've been partnered for 12 years now. I don't remember ever asking anyone, even once, "why not" when I learned they weren't partnered. And, I don't know many who would be that rude, regardless.

In fact, I can probably count of one hand the number of times I've ever inquired of any guy, his partner/single status. I frankly don't care, for the most part, unless I get to know someone better than bar-acquaintances.

 

[M4P]

Such questions are a little too personal to be asking someone you don't know. If you did know the person there'd be no reason to ask. So, yeah, its rude and not something I would do

 

[jockboy01]

Do you ever get tired of going to a bar, party or whatever and someone ask if you have a boyfriend in which you honestly answer no. And they reply "Why not?" As if there is something wrong with you.

Uh, I don't remember ever being asked that. I just answer no and move on. But honestly, I'm rarely asked the first question. I must be too ugly... or too pretty... I'll pretend it's the latter.

 

[spreadeagle]

Feeling 'lonely and bitter' because you are not in a relationship severely reduces your chances of ever being in one. Neediness is not an attractive feature and relationships based on mutual neediness rarely endure. A lifetime alone is to be preferred to five minutes in a relationship like that.

Paradoxically, by relishing your independence and having sufficient self-esteem to understand that whether or not you are partnered has no bearing at all on your intrinsic worth as a person you are far more likelyto encounter someone prepared to engage in an equal relationship with you.

 

[WYSIWYG]

'To those in a relationship why do you do that to us? We are already lonely and bitter why make us feel worse?'

1. No one has told you to be alone or bitter, or even make you feel worse!
2. Those are feelings you put upon yourself!
3. Some people chose to be alone, others are alone for other reasons!
4. Some people want and need to be in a loving relationship. If they are fortunate to be in one, I am happy for them.

I have been in both situations, and for me, I prefer a loving caring relationship. I feel more whole and more alive on every level!

We all have our real or imagined wants and needs. Some of us have been hurt to the point that living alone is preferred, while others, who have been hurt, still look for the love and relationship that they want.

 

[G-Lexington]

I'd never ask "Why not?" That's like, upon hearing what someone does for a living, saying, "Why that? Can't you get a better job?"

...which, by the way, people DO say to me.

Lex

 

[Ninja108]

I never ask personal questions like that. Often times it will end up with me putting my foot in my mouth

 

[timnmostud]

I've been in a relationship for 22 years and have never asked anyone something like that. If I did, it would not be to try to make someone feel bad, though. I may want to know about them. But I would not ask something like that. Most people with any manners at all, would not.

 

[Dejajb]

I get asked that a lot, but mostly from others who are single aswell. I, too, choose to be single and I say that. I'm in college, so I am having fun with friends and enjoying being 21, well now 22.

 

[dandy80]

well if I ever popped that question out, the next thing said would be: ...since you are so cute!

you shouldn`t be bitter for being single... take this time to explore yourself, what is good in you, what do you really want in a guy, etc.
when the right guy comes, you will be non-single in a minute

 

[Corny]

i don't see why this question should be rude at all. sometimes not all of the world is against you and out to get you. sometimes people are just honestly interested. sometimes this even might be meant as a compliment. but it's always so much easier to feel embarassed, insecure instead of giving a self-conscious answer.
btw my current bf asked me the same question. he thought i was lying when i said that i was single

 

[kevbo]

at least it's better than being straight and getting the "You don't have kids, yet?" look