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  • Thread starter Thread starter peeonme
  • Start date Start date
The acid test of you as a person is how you would react to a sweet young eighteen year old lad standing in the middle of the main road who had lost the will to live.

Would you offer him a lift and try to be a support to him in his hour of need or try to galvanise him back into positivity by a little hard shock treatment on the back seat!?
 

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A tough first week of residential training for these new recruits who all go home armed with certificates and the tall lad in the middle goes home with a tube of Fucidin cream for his sore bottom!😈😈😈
 

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Thanks for fixing my car mate!

I can't pay you but you're welcome to shag my shitter!😈😈😈
 

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When a little bastard like this gives you the middle finger after stealing from the garage and makes his getaway on the electric bike he's also stolen as a police constable on his first day you are going to" have" him and impress your boss!

He may be a cheeky little cunt but he's as horny as hell so you're gonna "have" him in every sense!
 

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You finally catch red-handed a little scrote that the police have been onto for months!

You apprehend him vandalising an ATM machine!

The problem is that he's a horny little fucker so you push him into the abandoned building next door and get him to grind his smelly arse into your face.......for starters!😈😈😈
 

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-You're a horny little fucker int ya!? You remind me of that footballer that got nicked.....Brandon Williams!

-Wish I had his money!

-Open yer legs for me mate and I'll make sure you don't go short of anything!😈😈😈
 

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-What the fuck are you doing in my house!?

-Just waiting for Ryan your lodger! He said we were going down the pub together!

-Sorry mate but he's had to drive the UPS van to London!

-I've had a wasted journey then!

-Not necessarily! I've got a bottle of Johnny Walker's in the lounge ( and a packet of condoms!)
 

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Not sure whether he's having a piss, contemplating his navel or sizing up a job but one thing I do know:

"That arse is just begging to be sniffed!"
 

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"I'm getting peanut butter and marmite with just a hint of Cadbury's Dairy Milk!"
 

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-Have you locked yourself out again mate!?

-Yep and Mum's still at work!

-Never mind you can wait in my flat!

( This is the bit I like as he gets up and turns to go up the stairs and I can almost get my nose right between those 18 year old arse cheeks without his noticing!)
 

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As his personal trainer I've got to find a way of getting him to squat on my face and make it seem as natural as all the other exercises in the programme!😈😈😈
 

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Who says "pink and green should never be seen!?"
 

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