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Accused Of Using Men For Sex Only

Re: Using Men For Sex Only

it must be purely psychological.

unless your bisexuality is unequally balanced. heh, if word of this gets to the psychs, then we're all going to be analyzed and recategorized.

i myself have different reasons why I'm attracted to both men and women, but I wouldn't say that the relationships are for sex only, though with men, it's more physical and pursuing the eye candy.
 
Re: Using Men For Sex Only

I usually Moderate Current Events and Politics, so when I have to come into this forum to clean up the personal attacks you know we have a problem. ;)

The original poster of this thread shared his feelings on a topic, and they are his feelings.

If you do not agree with his feelings, or his perspective then disagree as adults. This is after all an Adult Website.

If you don't like another member, then please put that member on your "Ignore List."

offtopic:
 
Re: Using Men For Sex Only

I usually Moderate Current Events and Politics, so when I have to come into this forum to clean up the personal attacks you know we have a problem.

Hey centexfarmer, thanx for the cleaning, altough it wasn't nesseccary. I don't mind those posts.
They doesn't concern me at all.
 
Re: Using Men For Sex Only

Don't worry about it man... I pretty much use men for sex only too. You know what??? None of them have complained. There's only one guy that I've ever been in love with and wanted a relationship with and he's married at the moment. I'm not saying I won't find another guy that I'm interested in a relationship with, just that I haven't up to this point.

BTW... I haven't posted on JUB in a long time, so hello to everyone. :wave:
 
Re: Using Men For Sex Only

You've just described the attitude of every guy who's ever had sex with me. They blew their load, and then they fucked off. They didn't have sex WITH me. There was no give from them, just take.

I haven't been sexually with that many men. Most of those men become more or less a buddy who i have sex with. Besides sex, we do much more things like having drinks, playing or watching soccer and much more. I don't blew my load and fuck off as the men you have been with. Does really every man did that to you?
 
One of my Jub buddies noticed that i seem to be connected to a certain controversy. It is about me having sex with men & women and me choosing only women to start a longterm relationship with. One gay man accused me of using men for sex only. Some are having a personal vendetta with me and some even dedicate a whole thread about my way of life.

It all comes down to my inability to feel emotionally conected to men, but yet the ability to feel sexual attracted to men. I don’t repress and i don’t ignore my emotional or romantic feelings for men at all. If i fall in love with a man, that will be fine as well. I don’t choose women for social acceptance. I do make out with men in public, so it isn't about acceptance.

I understand that gay men feel like a second rang low life when someone says to them: i can have sex with you, but i can’t love you. It doesn’t seem fair, but i can’t help it. It’s not that i don’t want to, but i just can’t. I feel friendship when i have sex with a man. It is sex with a buddy: fun and wild. Nothing emotional and nothing romantic.

Yes, some people are in denial and use this as a cover up, but this is not always the case.
I want to emphasize that it is not a choice to live this way. The intention of this thread is to clarify this two gender lust and one gender love possibility. When you have a couple of questions, just ask. Are there more people who has this kind of bisexuality?

What are your thoughts about this subject?

having sex with people you know beforehand that you can't have any emotional attachment to is A CHOICE.
taking into account that you can hurt somebody's feeling is reckless. it does not make it better by making your intentions clear to your prey before you get laid cause how can you ever look into someone's mind and say he is Ok with being fucked that way.
I don't know why you seem so eager to tell the "true" community of Gays and Bisexuals about your lifestyle. do you really think gays and true bisexuals have encountered that sort of people already. there is nothing honorable about posting your very special self-percieved sexuality and enjoying sleazy talks with other females.

sorry this is not about tolerance.
I can't understand why you have such following here on this forum's section
 
Saying sex must come hand-in-hand with romance, and that a romantic connection is the only valid one, is shallow. There are all sorts of emotional connections. The absense of romance doesn't automatically mean that someone is being used, especially when both parties know not to expect it.
 
hehe no I think he means he has no control over how he feels for certain people, fairly sure he doesnt see it as a mental illness or disability
 
Re: Using Men For Sex Only

you dont see it as some kind of disability or anything horrible like that, do you?

No dude, not at all! Read what i've wrote about this before:

The reason to start this thread is to give attention to this subject. I want show to the ones who are in the same position and who are confused about it, that this is possible and that there is nothing wrong with them.
 
Re: Using Men For Sex Only

Just because this is a gay website doesn’t mean that everyone is accepting of every little thing, especially when it comes to sex. And they shouldn't be

This is the single most thoughtless thing said in the entire thread...until I read the rest of your condescending as f**k reply.


Why? I have no idea. I’m not bisexual. Maybe it has something to do with machismo. Maybe it has something to do with these men wanting biological children.

This points to what gay men like you REALLY don't like about bisexuals. After reading all these ridiculous threads debating bisexual behavior and debating it in real life, it's pretty obvious that bisexual males percieved masculinity ("maybe it has something to do with machismo") makes them feel insecure about their own. In addition to the fact that they feel bisexuals get the benefits of both the gay and straight worlds ("men wanting biological children"). It's pretty pathetic to think that in this so called 'community' some gay men can't get passed their masculinty issues to see that not all gay/bi/queer/men exhibit the same behavior and are alike. We're a diverse group with different personalities and experiences.

This gay kid me and a friend met bar hopping one night accused me of being straight (although I could tell his mind was already made up by how he phrased it) and I had never felt so insulted in all my life. Mostly because he made a pretty heavy assumption about me after knowing me for 3 seconds, but mostly cause I felt like he was telling me 'I'm not gay enough'....which is essentially the same sentiment of a lot of guys who 'don't get' bisexuals. I don't make it a conscious effort to be masc-y and don't appreciate gay men that think that is the case.

I'm not trying to engage in any arguement with br-ma-al-83, I just thought I would do the polite thing and tap him on his shoulder and let him know his issues are showing ;)
 
Re: Using Men For Sex Only

Saying I don’t want a relationship with you because I wasn’t born that way is an excuse. Certain bi men don’t want to have a relationship with men, but they do want to have sex with them. There is a disconnect. If you’re willing to have sex with either male or female then the idea of not falling in love with either or doesn’t connect. Yes I can feel lust and physical attraction without feeling romantic attraction, but there’s a possibility for that lust and physical attraction to turn into something more.

I don't use excuses, i do not need excuses. Why would i use excuses? I'm sexually attracted to both gender and romantic attracted to one gender. I have met some really good guys in the past, but the romantic chemistry didn't happen. My emotional attraction with guys doesn't reach further than friendship.
 
I think people should just learn that nobody is the same and where some people will have sex with both genders, but capable of emotionally connecting to just one, or the other way around, or capable of loving only one sex, whether homo or hetro, it is who they are. Why judge people, if you don't want to be with anybody like that, it is your choice, but they should just accept people are who they are, and there preconceived notions of how others should behave or be is irrelevant in the real world.

Okay, rant over, I hope that made sense.

I'm just so sick of straight people judging gay people, gay people judging bisexuals, etc.
 
I wouldn't worry about it, Ralphie. You're one of the most nonjudgmental guys on this board, and I admire that about you.
Thanx Westwood :kiss:

I think people should just learn that nobody is the same and where some people will have sex with both genders, but capable of emotionally connecting to just one, or the other way around, or capable of loving only one sex, whether homo or hetro, it is who they are. They should just accept people are who they are.

Nicely said Pisces ..|
 
Re: Using Men For Sex Only

I'm just like that myself. It's heartbreaking when the guys feel they could actually start a relationship with you, but you know you won't live up to that. You just feel it and KNOW by heart you won't be there the way they ask. And if that's a crime, I'm fucking guilty. I don't control who I have deeper feelings for. It just happens. I can't say someday it won't happen to me that way with another guy, but I haven't found it in another man yet. I do believe it is possible for me to start a serious deep relationship with a guy, and I have tried before, but it's impossible when you don't feel it to be right. And when that happens it's better to either not get involved or just let things be as they are and not complicate it even further. Because both will be hurt afterwards.
That seems to be good advice. If you know that the guy you're sleeping with for fun might end up falling for you, then it's best to just end it. Either set him straight so that he understands, or end it so you won't lead him on and end up with a lot of drama on your hands.
 
what about let's all come back here 10 years from now and let's see if everyone here be saying the same thing? :lol
 
or rrralph, you're probably just straight but very open-minded. you're not attached to any moral entanglements. you find it a challenge to sleep with a guy and so you do it. you've been doing it for quite a long time that you've already forgotten why you'd done it in the first place.
 
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