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Advice

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dairyking469

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Hi, guys, I don't know if I need advice, a pep talk, or just the ability to vent.

I'm a very closeted 31 year old hairy, husky virgin. I think my younger sister, whom I raised, is no longer a virgin. It's bothering me, because she lost her virginity, and I don't like her boyfriend at all (three years), and I'm still a virgin. I promised my mother to raise her well, and I know my mother would not have wanted her to lose her virginity before she got married, just like she wouldn't want me to, either. But, even though I think I'm gay (or definitely bisexual), and from what I'm gathering from the gay community that guys aren't supposed to be virgins...my virginity doesn't really matter to me, personally. Yes, it would be a gift to the other person, but I'm a man. I know it sounds like a double standard.

My my two closest friends with whom I discussed part of this story suggested maybe I'm jealous. I don't feel like I am, I just wanted to be active first, since I have ten years on my sister. I feel depressed she is active, and I haven't smiled at her in days. I think she thinks something is bothering me but I won't admit it. I'll admit I'm rude to her boyfriend, and I only say hello to him.

I know I'm screwed up in my head. I come from a very traditional Italian family and her boyfriend isn't from the same culture.

Thanks for listening and reading. I don't have anyone to truly talk to.
 
Think you need to lighten up--21 year olds have sex. It's too bad you don't like him--I have been there with my sister, but she is an adult and can make bad decisions if she wants. I tried to give her sound advice but I've learned people do what they want when it comes to boyfriends. I'd just have a conversation about not getting pregnant and take her time. Because these decisions are life changing and you have to think before you jump. I'd focus in on you and trying to find someone you like. There are plenty of guys who like husky hairy guys. Are your two friends gay? Or woman who don't know you are gay? My family is Italian but not traditional---fairly modern with a few traditions---none of my sibs are married to Italians--lot's of people have traditional families but you still have to live your own life.
 
Virginity is overrated. Also, we´re in 2015. Let your sister do whatever she wants and go find yourself someone to fuck with. You´re in Long Island, for Christ´s sake, what more do you want? Leave others´ lives for themselves and go live yours. If you´re too shy in real life, try some sites, there are a lot of guys into hairy cubs. Try gay bear events too.
 
dairyking469 said:
I'm a very closeted 31 year old hairy, husky virgin. I think my younger sister, whom I raised, is no longer a virgin. It's bothering me, because she lost her virginity, and I don't like her boyfriend at all (three years), and I'm still a virgin....

Thanks for listening and reading. I don't have anyone to truly talk to.
Click to expand...

Assuming that your sister is over the age of 18, then it's time you stopped looking after her life and start looking after your own life. At this point, she would probably benefit more from a friend/brother and not so much from a parent.

The concept of "virgin" is a vague concept for gay guys. And in this case, it probably matters less whether whether you've played hide the salsiccia than it does whether you have a healthy love life and someone in your life to be your partner and confidant.

Life is too short. And at 31, it's time for you to start working on you and working on having a healthy social life... and healthy sexual life.




dairyking469 said:
Hi, guys, I don't know if I need advice, a pep talk, or just the ability to vent.
Click to expand...

Any of the three or all of the three are fine here.
 
Let your sister live her life. Be pleasant to her and her boyfriend. Be happy for her. Start living your life.
 
Ok, guys, thanks. I know you are all right, but it's just so hard and heartbreaking.

Also, I don't have any gay friends.
 
You won't have any gay friends until you go tell some people you're gay. That's how the closet works, it isolates. Ask yourself if you want to carry this around anymore, it doesn't get easier, just harder the older you get, and you are wasting your life hiding.
 
TX-Beau said:
You won't have any gay friends until you go tell some people you're gay. That's how the closet works, it isolates.
Click to expand...

And the best way to meet guys is through gay friends. pride:
 
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