After Orgasm Etiquette

[Croynan]

I just said the truth, baby. The only position where women do most of the work is when she's on top. That's it. In all other positions the man gets to do everything. Not that I'm complaining, mind you, but I was just explaining to Mrs. Spoilted Princess why we men are excused for collapsing after sex. Let the chips fall where they may.

save the pharase for your lady friends.
my guess would be they dislike the phrase as much as i do. it's old and hackneyed one and if you have not figured out by now it is also rather demeaning and condescending to either sex. one shouldn't make false assumptions that quasi males find it any more accepting then do intelligent females.

as for your behaviour toward the spoiled princess as you call her, she out classes you by rank and intelligence. i would say more on her behalf but i think that would be rude of me to do so, as i have the feeling she will take care of this matter in her own erudite manner.

eM.

 

[recuerdeme]

I like to feel the weight of the other guy on top of me.

 

[Croynan]

deleted/duplicate posting/eM.

 

[Lube]

And though the top does a lot of the pushing and the thrusting and the driving and the pounding and the bucking and the humping and the screwing and the pummeling ... does not excuse their lack of consideration for the bottom who (brace yourself I'm gonna get deep here) gave them a certain amount of trust and power to handle their body the way that they did. And in simpler terms... be appreciative and respectful to the person who assisted you in the explosive orgasm that landed you on top of their chest.

I can't see through your monitor, but it sure sounds like you are just laying there like a lump and letting him do whatever to you.

That's no way to have sex.

You have to pay attention to him--and his cock. And by "pay attention" I don't mean sucking or j/o'ing him. I mean communication.

1. What is his cock telling you? Can you tell by its feel/hardness when he's close? Men and women have told me my cock goes from hard to rock hard when I'm about to cum. It feels different inside their body and even in their hand. Do you notice this with your sex partner? If not, pay more attention next time (and every time thereafter )
2. What is his breathing/groaning telling you? Does his pattern of breathing/groaning change when he's close?
3. How does his thrusting/penetration change as he gets close to cumming? Does he speed up? Slow down? Alternate back and forth (edge)? Does he do this in a similar pattern each time?
4. Does his embrace of you change as he gets closer? Does he grip/hug tighter? Squeeze harder with his hands?
5. Have you asked him to rub your clitoris with his cock "stem" (although this can be uncomfortable/awkward) or his finger(s) as he gets closer, to get you as excited as he is?

As you notice this changes in his physicality during sex, you'll be able to take a more active role in sex. You should be able to guide him to make sex more pleasurable to you, and so that you can cum within seconds or minutes of each other, rather than waiting for the man to finish and then throw him off you and start yourself from scratch.

Just some thoughts.

 

[lyconthrope]

ok, this is even more ridiculous now than when it started.

lets all agree to disagree, most of us like the closeness and relax time after sex (whether we get off or not)

and others prefer to push their partners away because they "have shit to do" or roll off the lover, grab a cigarette and open a beer.

i go for the romance, sweaty cuddling, gentle breathing etc....

now, can we move on?

 

[jhnphilipps]

ok, this is even more ridiculous now than when it started.

lets all agree to disagree, most of us like the closeness and relax time after sex (whether we get off or not)

and others prefer to push their partners away because they "have shit to do" or roll off the lover, grab a cigarette and open a beer.

i go for the romance, sweaty cuddling, gentle breathing etc....

now, can we move on?

been there, done that. i could relate to most of the jubber's reply on this thread.
well in my case, after each orgasm-partner pushes me off of him becuz he had to have a bowel movement. it is that simple-and i hear him going. at any rate-each man to his own. peace out.

 

[Lube]

Well, first I must say I appreciate your post and all of the tips and direction you gave me. But it was a little left field to me as I am not quite sure where it came from and how exactly you got to thinking I was not active in bed and I made the man do all the work. Since this is a gay forum i will definitely not go into detail other than to say that this is not so. The sex lesson put a smile on my face and it was nice to hear these things from a man. I do not need it though as I am not a bump on a log in bed and I am very in tune to the connection between my lover and I. I agree with all that you said and again it was refreshing to read. Thanks

Well I quoted you saying

does not excuse their lack of consideration for the bottom

That and your other replies made it sound like you weren't helping to direct the outcome.

I mean, if you started a thread about it, it must be a recurring problem, no?

My question is, Why?

Why is he always coming before you? Why are you not coming at almost the same time? Why are you letting him cum first?

It's a two-way street, and all I heard were complaints about what he's doing, and nothing about what you're doing. That's all.

 

[Lube]

i go for the romance, sweaty cuddling, gentle breathing etc....

Oh, yeah, cuddling together while stuck together with cum is a great feeling. Putting his head on your chest and flicking your fingers through his sweaty hair, drawing your fingers across his sweaty arms, massaging his sweaty back.

Oh yeah!

 

[Joshua_me]

Oh, yeah, cuddling together while stuck together with cum is a great feeling. Putting his head on your chest and flicking your fingers through his sweaty hair, drawing your fingers across his sweaty arms, massaging his sweaty back.

Oh yeah!

I really have nothing to add to this thread, except to say, ^that's pure hottness^, and I totally agree....

 

[Dduder]

save the pharase for your lady friends.
my guess would be they dislike the phrase as much as i do. it's old and hackneyed one and if you have not figured out by now it is also rather demeaning and condescending to either sex. one shouldn't make false assumptions that quasi males find it any more accepting then do intelligent females.

I call my straight male friends "baby" too on occasion, and that's ok. But I won't call you that again because you don't deserve this nice treatment.

as for your behaviour toward the spoiled princess as you call her, she out classes you by rank and intelligence. i would say more on her behalf but i think that would be rude of me to do so, as i have the feeling she will take care of this matter in her own erudite manner.

Nah, you're just saying that because you don't like me and my opinions. Reading through my posts and hers, I would say that I'm more intelligent - not that it matters to me. Not only that, I am sure that I'm more intelligent than you, too. And nice going making personal attacks. That's a good way to win an argument always.

 

[Lube]

I call my straight male friends "baby" too on occasion, and that's ok. But I won't call you that again because you don't deserve this nice treatment.
Not only that, I am sure that I'm more intelligent than you, too.

You smarter than Croynan?

not by any evidence I've seen at JUB.

 

[Dduder]

You smarter than Croynan?
not by any evidence I've seen at JUB.

And of course you're saying this in a completely unbiased manner, given that you don't have a history of arguing with me in this board I can understand your resentement. It must have been really hard to have been intellectually humiliated by a 20 year-old, so I hold no grudge for this post of yours.