Am I being immoral or am I in the right

[thelaw18489]

Recently I been having issues with getting my life in order financially and career wise since I went to school for something that I realized post graduation I do not want to do. My parents are in no position to help me transition into the future and go back to school. I have often been told that I am smoking hot and I have allot of older men who want to pursue a relationship with me. I am at the point where I do not really have too many options to advance in life. I been recently thinking that maybe entering into a relationship with a man 15 or more years older then me. I do not find attraction in older men I am attracted to twinks and men who have less emotional baggage then me. I can have an emotional connection with an older man however I doubt if I really would want a phycial one if the man wasn't financially secure. So my question is, "is it wrong of me to be so desperate that I will consider interning into a relationship with financial motives even if I can connect with this person, is this the same as prostitution only legal. And for all you older men out there would you feel hurt if someone was attracted to the fact you have it together in life (I do not mean rich I only mean secure and steady job/income).

 

[eastofeden]

Only you can answer that question really.

Marrying for money is a common thing for alot of straight people and who is anyone else to judge them? There are alot of reasons people get married or become partners and I don't think we should let other people define who we are or what relationships are "worthy" when we are perfectly capable of defining these things for ourselves.

I think the important part of the equation is to just be completely honest with yourself and your partner. I think deceiving yourself or someone else is never really a good plan so as long as the situation works for both of you and you both get what you need or want...go for it.

 

[swerve]

You know -- life is BEAUTIFUL because it has CONTRASTS...

Sometimes AWESOME!!!

And yet that AWESOMENESS wouldn't be FULLY realized if it didn't have the HARD times as a comparison...

YES -- I think you are compromising your potential...

NOT because I care WHO you decide to be with -- but because YOU STATED that you were SETTLING for something other than YOUR ideal...

My suggestion is to FIGURE OUT HOW to succeed ON YOUR OWN with the TOOLS (education, experience, etc) you have at you disposal...

A SELF SUPPORTIVE you -- WILL be MUCH happier!!!

Best of luck...

 

[raskdog]

I am attracted to older men anyway, but yeah, one of the benefits is definitely financial security. I am pretty much financially secure anyway but having a rich partner and not one who relies on me is great.

 

[borg69unimatrix]

Let me get this right -

It took you that many years of school, and graduating to decide you didn't like what you were studying?

Seriously?

And now you're surprised that your parents don't want to start over with you to go through all that again?
What if you decided on a whim you didn't like the second career at the last minute?

... and using someone for money is your best option?

I'm rather appalled by your life choices thus far, to be honest.

You give the impression you expect things to be easy and handed to you, and if you don't get it you're willing to misrepresent yourself to basically steal it from someone else to get what you want without working for it.

Use the degree you have, like it or not, and get a job and support yourself. Life's not easy, and it's not handed to you. You'll respect yourself a lot more in the end if you make your own way.

 

[Seasoned]

The real question is what is your reluctance to face consequences and to be self-sufficient? As for your question, anything and everything in life is for sale if there are buyers and sellers.

 

[umjreon88]

I'm a pretty stable twink, would I be eligible?

Lol, it really is up to you. Would you get on with someone just because they have the financial means to support you? Or would you rather look for a guy who is more your type and has the capacity to to partially support you and grow with you? If I were you, the latter would suffice because growth can be gain besides the ability to be financially stable and love someone and also grow with them.

Loving someone for who they are matters eventually and most importantly. Living off someone whom you have no love for would only hurt you in the long run...

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

I think you should sort your life out on your own before you start a relationship of any kind.
Also, persue what you studied. At least until the economy picks up again.

 

[Rolyo85]

Eh, I wouldn't really judge you, but it's fairly trashy, and a LOT of people will judge you.

You can sell yourself to some sugar daddy, but that will do NOTHING for your future. I rarely agree with borg guy up there, but he is right in one thing - you kinda act like you expect things to be handed to you. Why not look for a job? Take a year off, save money, get a scholarship. Then you don't have to compromise on your dignity. And if you don't have to compromise with your dignity, then you need to do some rethinking. Being hot - even "smokingly" so (btw, feel free to pm me a pic ^_^) - is transient, and you should never get used to rely on looks to get you through life. Most pretty boys make that mistake, and it rarely ends well for them.

 

[KaraBulut]

If life is like a journey, sometimes you realize that you've taken the wrong road and you're in the wrong place.

The solution is to backtrack, figure out where you went wrong and get back on the right road.

The solution is not to pick another wrong road to go down.

So my question is, "is it wrong of me to be so desperate that I will consider interning into a relationship with financial motives even if I can connect with this person, is this the same as prostitution only legal.

Wrong of you to be desperate? No.

Wrong to be headed down yet another wrong road instead of the right one? Yeah.

 

[thelaw18489]

Thanks for the advice guys. Let me clarify one thing I been looking allot for a job in the feild I went for however i went for marketing and now all the marketing jobs are sales something that I get laughed out of the interview when I go for a sales job because I am too nice of a person and I have a soul. I appreciate all the answers even the ones that misunderstood a few things. I said I was not physically attracted but can be emotionally atracted, my question was if it was okay to be with someone you have no physical attraction to just because you have an emotional connection and we can live together and I will have both physcial and emotional support while I go back to school in a masters program in most likely nursing. I am not entering into a relationship so another man can pay my way completly im more then able to do that myself and I never would ask anyone to ever pay my personal bills, pay for my school, or buy me expensive things cause I am not like it. What I mean about stabilty is someone who does have his life established and can provide security knowing that by being in school I am able to work part time and not worry about rent, food, electric and those things then when I get my masters I want to contribute since I don't want to be supported just need security in my life that no one else can give me since my parents are dealing with there own troubles with my dads illness and I do not have any other close family.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

Go out there and get yourself a job or something. Self-reliance is the best thing there is.

 

[Rolyo85]

Thanks for the advice guys. Let me clarify one thing I been looking allot for a job in the feild I went for however i went for marketing and now all the marketing jobs are sales something that I get laughed out of the interview when I go for a sales job because I am too nice of a person and I have a soul. I appreciate all the answers even the ones that misunderstood a few things. I said I was not physically attracted but can be emotionally atracted, my question was if it was okay to be with someone you have no physical attraction to just because you have an emotional connection and we can live together and I will have both physcial and emotional support while I go back to school in a masters program in most likely nursing. I am not entering into a relationship so another man can pay my way completly im more then able to do that myself and I never would ask anyone to ever pay my personal bills, pay for my school, or buy me expensive things cause I am not like it. What I mean about stabilty is someone who does have his life established and can provide security knowing that by being in school I am able to work part time and not worry about rent, food, electric and those things then when I get my masters I want to contribute since I don't want to be supported just need security in my life that no one else can give me since my parents are dealing with there own troubles with my dads illness and I do not have any other close family.

Well, you paint it in pretty words, but in the end, whether penises will go into holes is irrelevant, what counts is whether you go out there looking for a financially stable guy, or for a partner. The two paths lead to different places, and being with someone you aren't physically attracted to is at least partly a lie.

 

[Praxus]

You're too nice of a person and you have a soul? Doesn't sound like you're that type of person if you're willing to misrepresent yourself to someone you expect to get free rent/food/ect out of. I hate it when people do things like this. Might as well go be a paid escort, at least that way the person you're going to do this to won't get hurt in the end.

 

[MindBlast]

There's one other option, you could be a houseboy, but then you'll have to do chores. And you might get spanked if you don't!

(example: You do chores for an older man and show off your body for him in return for free rent and food).

 

[Rendro]

Two and a half years ago I graduated from a business school. For the past three years I've been working at pretty good jobs that paid decently and were moderately enjoyable. But for a few years I've known that my true passion is psychology. Over the past year I have been thinking about making this transition to psychology and pursuing a graduate degree in the field. One of the major cons in this decision is that I will probably be much less secure financially than if I continued my career/studies in business. But I recently overcame my fear and started sending out applications to graduate schools in psychology. Am I worried? yes! would it be nice to have an older, financially secure man to support me? probably yes. But I have a feeling that I will be much more proud of myself and the ride will be much more interesting if I make it on my own. Plus reaching financial security on my own is an extra motivation to work harder.

 

[Kabluey]

The real question is what is your reluctance to face consequences and to be self-sufficient?

So true. The whole deciding the degree was the wrong choice when the time comes to find a job and the desire to find someone to look after you (like a parent might) point to the above.

 

[Laufey]

Its not wrong if he realizes it.

If you are leading him on then its wrong.

And yes its the same as prostitute, just not as messy.

You might regret it and feel lonely. Really think about it from all aspects before doing anything.

 

[cgymike]

One real problem about sugar daddy deals is that often it's the sugar daddy that ends up dumping the dependent guy because maybe HE finds someone hotter than you. If he's a true sugar daddy HE will manipulate also. It's a destructive relationship very often. It sounds like from your account of things so far you don't need more negatives in your life. As Kara and others have pointed out is is pretty much up to YOU in the self-improvement department. Looking to others to do that for you may not only not work but may set you back.