Am I crazy or is he cheating

[bankside]

we talked about the guard and andrew claims the guy is into stuff like sniffing ass while someone is pissing and wants andrew to poop in front of him and then spank him. He also claims to have mob ties and threatens to out andrew frequently to keep his ear. the guard had a boyfriend until march and they broke up after their wrestling got out of hand. the guard says he knows all about me through his contacts at the state and hates my kind. So I guess andrew believes all this and worries this guy will harm us or whatever.
Assuming andrew is afraid then maybe they have done something but he won't admit it. I also don't think anyone in the store would believe andrew if he said he wasn't gay (as I've been quizd by a curious checker a couple times in the past). I don't see how andrew could possibly believe this guy or even tolerate his advances. I asked him to be straight up and tell the guy he wants him to leave him alone or he will tell management he is harassing him. that made him cry at the thought of being outed or worse so I didn't push anymore.
Now andrew knows if I find out he is messing with this guy I will dump him. maybe im a jerk but I forbid him from talking to the guy for any length of time and begged him to think this out and realize this guy is nothing but an old pig. I gave andrew the chance to take a break from me and decide if he wanted to move on.
So he is here asleep and I am in a gay soap opera. should I approach the guard? (yes he can probably kick my ass) should I let it ride and trust andrew like I want to do? maybe I should tell andrews mother and let her intervene. maybe have my head examined for getting involved with a young guy.
you all can give me the business cause lord knows I got plenty of crap today at my cousins wedding reception.
I thought about paying off this guard to just leave andrew alone but im a bit drunk so.

Okay, that was the missing info. Scrap what I said before. Now the guard is a pervy old fuck who wants to bully the young guy to see what he can get away with and how far he can push.

New list:

• Paying off a bully doesn't work.
• Even in a recession there are other jobs out there. Young guy should start putting his resume out there because so far, he works with a pervy old bully and a bunch of nosey gossipy assholes and there are way better jobs with way better employers.
• Two gay guys in a relationship have to be able to trust each other, and they have to be able to trust other gay men enough that one of them can go out with a friend and be confident that an affair is not about to happen. If their entire group of friends would actually start an affair when it is just supposed to be going out for coffee, then the two gay guys both need to ditch their friends and start over finding new ones. No matter what happens with this old jerk at work, that issue of loyalty & jealousy has to get figured out for any relationship to have a future.
• Young guy should be easily able to see why it is good to avoid the guard, even if he is not sure how to stay away from him when they have to work together. He needs to learn how to give the could shoulder until he can get out of there for a better job.

 

[capchino2009]

while meeting with andrews mom regarding some personal business I mentioned that I had been getting some threatening calls and suspected the guard at the store andrew works at. she mentioned that andrews brother told her that wednesday night the guard had shown up at a pool hall and they'd played pool til midnight. I told her that if andrew was still friends with the guy I was done with him. we talked about andrews birthday (aug3) and agreed to let me deal with the guard. she called me a half hour later telling me she called andrews manager but he could only ask andrew if the guard was harassing him.
of course I was mad and drove to the store to do ?? I go inside and don't see andrew in the checkstand but when I get to the pharmacy I see he and the guard joking and carrying on for about 3 minutes. I just said "he's all yours" and walked away. andrew jumped up from the high blood pressure machine and followed me out crying and begging me to stop. I had to calm him down so I told him we would work it out somehow. evidently andrews mom told him I knew about the pool hall and he called me begging me not to dump him and saying he can't live without me. knowing he had to get through work I told him it was ok.
I got a ride to the store and picked up my car (andrew was still using it) and texted andrew to call his mom for a ride home. this was near the end of his shift.
andrew claims he will quit his job but I don't want that. he says he won't live without me in his life but im very hurt and convinced there is no way I can get him away from this guard. I told andrew he and I could be only friends and he can hang out with that guard and he cried and claims he will never say another word to the guard.
I do want andrew in my life but im ready to find something more. im undecided because there is no proof they had sex but what the hell?
haven't seen andrew since friday but we have talked a lot and have gotten no where.
I intend to run a check on the guard to make sure he isn't as crazy as I think he is.

 

[rareboy]

I'm calling bullshit.

 

[capchino2009]

I get it - you're one of those broke ass cynical trolls huh? get colder cause its the only way you can roll

 

[rareboy]

Well actually I'm going to answer your original question.

Yes, I think you're crazy.

 

[G-Lexington]

The entire story isn't making much sense. Guard says he's into scat, has mob ties, and got dumped by his last boyfriend for getting too rough with him. You've told your bf to stop dealing with the guard. Bf says he can't live without you. But you come to work, and he's hanging out with the guard, laughing.

You've tried to make him choose between you two. He's told you - in actions rather than words - that he isn't going to choose between you two. He wants both. It's up to you what to do with this information.

Lex

 

[billybob109]

1. it makes no sense becuase if the guard was threatning him he would not be hanging out with him and laughing with him all the time.
2. i think andrew is a liar and is using you for your 'goodies', get rid of the dead weight.

 

[creatus]

2. i think andrew is a liar and is using you for your 'goodies', get rid of the dead weight.

Yes, it does sound so. Good heaven, I wouldn't be that surprised if Andrew had said to the guard about the OP something like he has said about the guard - e.g., "my crazy bf, threatens to beat me up if I leave him, etc".
Run away.

 

[spencer]

Cap, that's some crazy shit going on and your reaction to it is pretty over the top.

Here's what I don't get. ASK HIM IF HE CHEATED ON YOU?

It maybe out of line had you not done everything that was totally out there but you basically did everything but.

I went to his house and asked his mom then I went to work and dumped him in front of everyone as he comes out running crying (and he's supposed to be in the closet and you're supposed to help him stay in the closet). But I still don't know if he's cheated... hmmm

well you did everything and then some, so just pin him down and ask the question (figuratively). or have you already?

 

[Kinsho]

I agree with Billy and Creatus. It's time to move one. He has obviously lied to you, which means he is likely to do it again in the future. If you think you can handle still being friends good for you, but end the relationship part. Try to move on also. Do not hang on to trying to work it out because it will only make it worse when it doesn't.

But that's just MY opinion

 

[evanrick]

You ARE crazy, crazy, crazy.

Lending ANY 18 year old guy a 2008 BMW is very very stupid.

dont listen to me tho, im not here to judge or lecture ppl. i just find it incredibly irresponsible. who cares if hes your bf or not, its just a bad decision.

this younger bf of yours obviously likes men older than he. i have no doubt that is possible this other man did something with him

this seems like an easy decision to me. he may not be cheating, but either way your bound to end up in trouble if this is just a taste of things to come.

 

[capchino2009]

oh to be an ordinary bloke- it is so hard to find love. you don't have to believe it but I just hope to be normal guy with great gay friends.
my days with andrew have lost their flair and although I've met a guy from bulgaria who tried to have sex with me and tried to get me expelled from a casino where I have a 500k pad after a great night. Granted im not the best looking guy but a who ever got in trouble for refusing to take home a tramp.
im off to st croix tomorrow within my cousin tomorrow and my baby dog too.

 

[capchino2009]

I love round butts and both andrew and the bulgarian have round butts. I love short guys (im short) but i like em shy. I don't go to gay bars but maybe I should. I can spot a gold digger most of the time but I am subject to the crap too. have any ideas? email me <redacted>.

 

[rareboy]

Yes. I repeat. You are crazy. But you seem to enjoy your life so who are we to suggest counselling or medication.

And by the way, posting your email is verboten.

 

[bounder]

I love round butts and both andrew and the bulgarian have round butts. I love short guys (im short) but i like em shy. I don't go to gay bars but maybe I should. I can spot a gold digger most of the time but I am subject to the crap too. have any ideas? email me <redacted>

You might be a nice guy after all, but they way you've presented yourself in this thread doesn't make for a good personal ad.

 

[hazaleyez1975]

I dont date guys younger than me. It seems that they have alot of maturing to do. It would have to be an exception that I would give my 18 year old boy friend the keys to my inherited bmw. There is just some things you have to let them do on there own. Maybe that is why I am single