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Am I Hated on Here?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Zildjian
  • Start date Start date
Z

Zildjian

Guest
I get the feeling that others are annoyed by my "presence" here, mainly in this aspect of the forum.

No one takes my input seriously in threads, I receive no replies from friendly PMs that I send (like Chris - I_Just_Blew...), etc.

Please let me know so I can address this by fully resigning from the JUB forum or modifying my participation.

Thanks!
 
I, honestly, cannot answer that question because I haven't noticed you before or read any of your replies on posts, etc.

For a wild guess, I would probably say no your are not hated.

I think it is very common, most of my replies are not taken seriously either, that doesn't mean that nobody looks at them or read them.

Since I'm being honest, I also wanted to point out that maybe the reason that not many people notice you is that you put very little information in your profile. Usually, when we want to know more of a person, we look at the profile. I know the phrase "you can't judge a book by its cover" but it is just something most everybody like to do.

Try updating your profile with a little bit of more information about yourself, so others can get a chance to find out who you are.

That is my personal opinion, you can choose not to.
 
eternaldarkness you have a good point. i admit many times when i read posts i will check the profile to get a feel for the author. it gives me a bit more info into that person and possibly why they responded a certain way. many times i have blown off participating/responding in a thread because of the dearth of information there.

i understand the no photo...some don't have the equipment to enter pictures or have a great need to stay in their closet and can't take a chance or their photo being recognized. but, the general info is so bland that the descriptions are virtually un traceable. however, the participation in 'about me' is voluntary as is my responses to their posts and threads. enough said i'm off my:soapbox:for now ..|
 
I can only answer for myself, and I certainly don't hate you.

:wave:

Jerr
 
Zildjian said:
I get the feeling that others are annoyed by my "presence" here, mainly in this aspect of the forum.
Click to expand...

I think if people were really irritated by your presence they would make it abundantly clear in PMs, comments and the general tone of their replies to your posts.

No one takes my input seriously in threads, I receive no replies from friendly PMs that I send (like Chris - I_Just_Blew...), etc.
Click to expand...

I am sure there are plenty of people that agree with your posts, I know from experience if I see a post that goes along the same lines as what I would write I don't always bother posting.

Please let me know so I can address this by fully resigning from the JUB forum or modifying my participation.

Thanks!
Click to expand...

I'd just continue being yourself, I am sure there are plenty of friendly people out there that you haven't met yet that will like you for who you are! JUB is a very big place.
 
Being honest here. I know your (JUB) name, although I believe your avvy has changed as of late. But were someone to ask me "tell me about Zildjian", I really couldn't say much. On a positive note, that means you're not being annoying. On a negative note, that means you're not making much of an impression. On ME, anyway - other JUBbers, or JUB as a whole, may be a different story.

Some might argue that being ignored is even worse than being hated. I'd say it isn't, but that's just me. If you want to pick up your ball and go home - whether because you feel you're "hated" or not - that's your call.

Lex
 
Yeah I felt similar to you at first. I would post something that I thought was brilliant and get no reply. But then, as someone said above, I realized *I* often didn't reply to others' brilliant posts--just silently shook my head in agreement.

As Lex says, I put a lot of my experience and life history in my posts (perhaps too much) so people get a feel of where I'm coming from.
 
hmmm...ive never even noticed you. Ive been coming on here for like 3 years and havent ever seen u, haha
 
When you post something, dont look at how many replies you have...look at how many views. now imagine most of those are silent agreements and nods of the head? then your not being annoying. Theres to many people on here for everybody to think one person is being annoying.

^Luka, wheres your picture...you sexy beast lol;)
 
I can't even think of a recent posting or thread from you that would generate the feeling that you're 'hated'.

...but I know from your older threads that you are deeply conflicted about many things and dealing with many complex issues about your place in society in general and your future as a happy and out gay man.

You can modify your input or you can resign, but I don't think that you're going to find anybody suggesting you do so. I also doubt if you'll have a flood of posters begging you to stay....you have to do what feels right for you.
 
rareboy said:
...but I know from your older threads that you are deeply conflicted about many things and dealing with many complex issues about your place in society in general and your future as a happy and out gay man.
Click to expand...

Well, part of that seems to be in the process of resolving. One thing that was a primary issue for me on here, was the issue of being an African American gay male and wanting a relationship with someone of a different ethnicity who wouldn't judge me through the filter of negative stereotypical views of non-whites.

You can modify your input or you can resign, but I don't think that you're going to find anybody suggesting you do so. I also doubt if you'll have a flood of posters begging you to stay....you have to do what feels right for you.
Click to expand...

No, I'm asking for people to beg me to stay. I was simply wondering why it seems I'm was being ignored, or if I had offended someone, etc.
 
I doubt you're hated. Most people probably have no idea who you or most of the other people on here are.

You'll probaby be happier if you adjust your expectations about the board.

It's in the nature of these public forums that many posts just get ignored and many threads just die out. Likewise some posts result in hostile or bitchy responses simply because they're easy or because the person replying is feeling hostile and bitchy. Likewise with PMs.

That doesn't mean you still can't enjoy the boards for what they are and if more comes from them then that's great. But you'll probaby be more content if you see that as a bonus and not as a need.
 
i know how u feel when i make post on here not that many see it or repile
and for the one you feel may not like you the hell with them. cos thats what i say to the one on here that dont like me
 
Not by me. No hate here. Only a couple people on here I've come to hate, and they're relentless trolls.

Modify your expectations somewhat. Most people on here won't even see your comments in any given thread. Most of those who do will give them a cursory glance at best. Most of those who read your comments won't think much about them for good or ill. Most of those who do have opinions about your comments won't say anything.

That's not just you. That's everybody.

Every time someone responds to a comment I make, I consider it a gift. If they don't...well, that's the way it goes. I've had whole threads sink, uncommented. I'm sure there are those on here that wish I would give up! But I persist. And you can too, to quote Stephen Colbert.
 
No, you're not hated. I know you've been working through some issues but I want you to know you're valued and welcomed by the JUB family

BTW...you don't respond to my comments

I'm glad you're here and hope you don't resign

(*8*)
 
I doubt you're hated. (*8*)

I felt like no one was paying much attention to me for about my first thousand posts. Then for a while I really wished that some people weren't paying attention to me -- believe me, if you're not liked or wanted, you'll know. :!:

So... stick around. You may never develop a fan club, but not many do except in limited circles. If you're feeling unwanted, drop in on Fun & Games; you have to be a total reactionary throwback to not be welcomed there, and since you seem much higher up the scale than that, you'd get a nice welcome -- and we even cry on each other's shoulders there (it's the unlisted "safe" zone, 'cause nobody takes it seriously, mostly). (*W*)

If you want attention, post something obnoxious or ridiculous in Hot Topics... just be ready for obnoxious and ridiculous replies. :D
 
You've posted less than 1 post per day since you've been here (on average) I don't hate you, but a voice so tiny gets lost in the mass of posts other people post.

I don't hate you, I don't know you.

Trust me, if you say something that people don't agree with, or your ever hated, you will know!
 
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