james1200
Professional Hoodrat
Holy Gay Hypocrisy! (Redux)
Three Stories In One!
By now you've heard that another pastor has resigned from disgraced Evangelical Ted Haggard's Colorado Springs New Life Church. The pastor, unfortunately and oh-so-appropriately named Christopher Beard stepped down over "poor judgement" and "sexual misconduct".
While none of the stories explicitly say Beard's of the cock sucking variety, we've no doubt his transgressions involved a bit of boner-related relations. Seriously, look at that picture. Gay.
As for the "poor judgement", Beard held a mock missionary training program with mock assault weapons. Drivers thought they were real and called the SWAT team. What we don't understand is why Beard wasn't fired right then and there. The church must have been more lenient in those days, but that whole Haggard/Mike Jones scandal opened their eyes.
Associate pastor Rob Brendle says:
We recognize there will be increased scrutiny of our church in the wake of the scandal. We welcome that process in order to reinforce the high standard of personal integrity and morality that has characterized New Life's employees for 22 years.
Thus, Brendle and his homies are working to "excise" morally disordered church-goers.
That's right, just send them out the street. That'll learn em.
In other New Life Church news, apparently Ted Haggard had agreed to narrate a PETA ad. Kind of silly, right? Well, PeTA really wanted Haggard, but dropped him when the scandal broke. PETA VP Bruce Friedrich says:
We were very disappointed that Pastor Ted pulled out. This project needs someone who is committed to thinking outside the box the way Pastor Ted did. We are continuing to look for another evangelical who is preaching about moral issues.
Does this strike anyone else as a bit queer? Are Evangelicals America's new superstars? If so, we're moving.
Okay, finally - you should head on over to Proceed at Your Own Risk, where Richard's compiled a brilliant top ten reasons to be an Evan. Our favorite: "The right to blame all your mistakes, faults and misdeeds on Satan."
That's far more righteous than our standard dismissal of being fuckwad dickhead prick shits. People don't really buy that one.
Source: Queerty.com.
Three Stories In One!
By now you've heard that another pastor has resigned from disgraced Evangelical Ted Haggard's Colorado Springs New Life Church. The pastor, unfortunately and oh-so-appropriately named Christopher Beard stepped down over "poor judgement" and "sexual misconduct".
While none of the stories explicitly say Beard's of the cock sucking variety, we've no doubt his transgressions involved a bit of boner-related relations. Seriously, look at that picture. Gay.
As for the "poor judgement", Beard held a mock missionary training program with mock assault weapons. Drivers thought they were real and called the SWAT team. What we don't understand is why Beard wasn't fired right then and there. The church must have been more lenient in those days, but that whole Haggard/Mike Jones scandal opened their eyes.
Associate pastor Rob Brendle says:
We recognize there will be increased scrutiny of our church in the wake of the scandal. We welcome that process in order to reinforce the high standard of personal integrity and morality that has characterized New Life's employees for 22 years.
Thus, Brendle and his homies are working to "excise" morally disordered church-goers.
That's right, just send them out the street. That'll learn em.
In other New Life Church news, apparently Ted Haggard had agreed to narrate a PETA ad. Kind of silly, right? Well, PeTA really wanted Haggard, but dropped him when the scandal broke. PETA VP Bruce Friedrich says:
We were very disappointed that Pastor Ted pulled out. This project needs someone who is committed to thinking outside the box the way Pastor Ted did. We are continuing to look for another evangelical who is preaching about moral issues.
Does this strike anyone else as a bit queer? Are Evangelicals America's new superstars? If so, we're moving.
Okay, finally - you should head on over to Proceed at Your Own Risk, where Richard's compiled a brilliant top ten reasons to be an Evan. Our favorite: "The right to blame all your mistakes, faults and misdeeds on Satan."
That's far more righteous than our standard dismissal of being fuckwad dickhead prick shits. People don't really buy that one.
Source: Queerty.com.
That's the new Doctor Who! 
