Hello everyone!
So, yes...it's one of those threads. Boy meets boy. Boy likes boy. Boy Flirts with boy. Boy get's response. Boy begins falling. Boy is scared. Move on if any of this sounds familliar (which it probably is).
Let's take it from the top...
I've been singing in a choir for quite some time, 11 years to be exact. It's an all boys choir. Basically, all my life I've known that I am attracted to boys and girls, which was quite confusing for me growing up, but I'm ok with being bisexual now. Anyway, one of my pals quit during the christmas break and when we came back, he was replaced with another guy who had previously been in the choir, but who had left for miltary service for a year.
Anyway, this guy and I, we first met when I was about 10 and I remember that I really didn't like him. Now, he was back and being really friendly. And also staring. We sat next to each other and made jokes and had a really good time during the reharsals. I really, really liked him as a friend, but I was involved with another guy at the time. When it didn't pan through, I was kind of lonely. Then THE guy started standing really close and staring a lot at me. Actually, I believe that he has always done that, but I kind of ignored it.
Anyway, it wasn't until we went out to eat one time with another friend and he sort of hugged me for a long time, that I felt a spark between us. After that, things just became heated.
You see, every year, our choir goes on a tour. This year it was to Italy. And boy, did stuff happen over there.
First, there was partying. Several times, he grabbed my ass. In our choir, people have this machotype behaviour where they also try to avoid being to "gay" or what you call it. Now, most people have already figured out my status, although I have never confirmed it, so they avoid such contact. This guy, isn't shy at all. Besides grabbing my ass, he kept complementing my clothes, my hair, everything! Whenever we would see each other, I would get a compliment. And then there were two times, when we were both a bit drunk that we had "moments". You know, those moments, right before a kiss. When you look into each others eyes and you can't shy away, and someone holds you tight, and you can feel their hearts beat, you feel their warm bodies tingle with excitement and you just know, just know, that there's a kiss on it's way. Well, both times we were interupted. Also, one night, I spent 3 hours in his room, lying next to him and listening to his iPod, while he was in his briefs only. And he kept looking at me and we just lay there, silently listening and watching each other.
After the trip, we didn't see each other much. Save for two times, once with some other friends and another time, when he came to my job at McDonalds (where one of the girls that his friends had met commented on the looks between us), we didn't see each other at all. Not until August, when the new semester began.
We barely spoke. And we went to this camp like thing with the choir to practice. During that weekend, we were roomies. And for some reason, I decided that liqour was something good. So I cam on, way stronger than I usually do and he responded by saying: "I'm not going to be intimate with you tonight". I joked it off and we went to bed. After that incident, the vibe between us is still weird.
I mean, he looks at me still. And has begun "jokingly" running up and hug/tickle me every time we rehearse, but really, we aren't talking like we used to. I still feel the same way about him. Hmm, just realised that I haven't said how I feel about him. He's funny, he's charming, he's smart, he's sexy as hell and has a great body;-) And all I can do, is think about him.
Now, I know...I should probably just tell him how I feel. But honestly, I just can't imagine loosing him. Everything would change. Everything. And I'm not sure, if I'm ready. I guess what I need from you guys is some help to give me the courage to ask him to do something with me that isn't totally obvious.
Or something else, I don't know...But I feel that I need your help. Please?
So, yes...it's one of those threads. Boy meets boy. Boy likes boy. Boy Flirts with boy. Boy get's response. Boy begins falling. Boy is scared. Move on if any of this sounds familliar (which it probably is).
Let's take it from the top...
I've been singing in a choir for quite some time, 11 years to be exact. It's an all boys choir. Basically, all my life I've known that I am attracted to boys and girls, which was quite confusing for me growing up, but I'm ok with being bisexual now. Anyway, one of my pals quit during the christmas break and when we came back, he was replaced with another guy who had previously been in the choir, but who had left for miltary service for a year.
Anyway, this guy and I, we first met when I was about 10 and I remember that I really didn't like him. Now, he was back and being really friendly. And also staring. We sat next to each other and made jokes and had a really good time during the reharsals. I really, really liked him as a friend, but I was involved with another guy at the time. When it didn't pan through, I was kind of lonely. Then THE guy started standing really close and staring a lot at me. Actually, I believe that he has always done that, but I kind of ignored it.
Anyway, it wasn't until we went out to eat one time with another friend and he sort of hugged me for a long time, that I felt a spark between us. After that, things just became heated.
You see, every year, our choir goes on a tour. This year it was to Italy. And boy, did stuff happen over there.
First, there was partying. Several times, he grabbed my ass. In our choir, people have this machotype behaviour where they also try to avoid being to "gay" or what you call it. Now, most people have already figured out my status, although I have never confirmed it, so they avoid such contact. This guy, isn't shy at all. Besides grabbing my ass, he kept complementing my clothes, my hair, everything! Whenever we would see each other, I would get a compliment. And then there were two times, when we were both a bit drunk that we had "moments". You know, those moments, right before a kiss. When you look into each others eyes and you can't shy away, and someone holds you tight, and you can feel their hearts beat, you feel their warm bodies tingle with excitement and you just know, just know, that there's a kiss on it's way. Well, both times we were interupted. Also, one night, I spent 3 hours in his room, lying next to him and listening to his iPod, while he was in his briefs only. And he kept looking at me and we just lay there, silently listening and watching each other.
After the trip, we didn't see each other much. Save for two times, once with some other friends and another time, when he came to my job at McDonalds (where one of the girls that his friends had met commented on the looks between us), we didn't see each other at all. Not until August, when the new semester began.
We barely spoke. And we went to this camp like thing with the choir to practice. During that weekend, we were roomies. And for some reason, I decided that liqour was something good. So I cam on, way stronger than I usually do and he responded by saying: "I'm not going to be intimate with you tonight". I joked it off and we went to bed. After that incident, the vibe between us is still weird.
I mean, he looks at me still. And has begun "jokingly" running up and hug/tickle me every time we rehearse, but really, we aren't talking like we used to. I still feel the same way about him. Hmm, just realised that I haven't said how I feel about him. He's funny, he's charming, he's smart, he's sexy as hell and has a great body;-) And all I can do, is think about him.
Now, I know...I should probably just tell him how I feel. But honestly, I just can't imagine loosing him. Everything would change. Everything. And I'm not sure, if I'm ready. I guess what I need from you guys is some help to give me the courage to ask him to do something with me that isn't totally obvious.
Or something else, I don't know...But I feel that I need your help. Please?
