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anyone else with a high profile job? Need advice

W

wxnut01

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Hi I am brand new to the forum but have lurked for a little bit. I posted the following in the new members section but I figure I would repost here too. I am going to remain pretty anonymous because of my job but I wanted to say hi to everyone on here. I work in a very public job where thousands of people watch me every evening and am hoping some other media people post on here because I am going through some stuff right now. I don't have other close gay friends in my profession but if there are any out there and willing to talk to someone please let me know. I'm 32 so I don't know if that counts as a "boy" as the website says but I'm very youthful and stay fit and active. Thanks in advance! I'd rather keep what's going on between other people in a similar profession too because I don't know what to do right now. I hope someone on here can help!

Wxnut.
 
Welcome aboard. I must say it is a bit harder to stay anonymous when you announce that you're famous, at least in some market. If I can give you a piece of advice you never asked for, just stay tuned for the people who are reliable and low-key, and not the ones who fit a particular profile you imagine to be "safer" because of their profession. (or because of the profession they say they have when they post on the internet.)

Anyway, like I said, welcome aboard!
 
bankside said:
Welcome aboard. I must say it is a bit harder to stay anonymous when you announce that you're famous, at least in some market. If I can give you a piece of advice you never asked for, just stay tuned for the people who are reliable and low-key, and not the ones who fit a particular profile you imagine to be "safer" because of their profession. (or because of the profession they say they have when they post on the internet.)

Anyway, like I said, welcome aboard!
Click to expand...

Thank you! Trust me it will only take a minute with chattin' with someone in my profession to tell if they are lying, or if they are in the same profession. I appreciate the good words and welcome. And I am staying anonymous lol. But I have an issue that only others in my field will understand and I can't just find people like myself who are not out that do what we do so I figure I would turn to the "safety" of the internet.
 
Welcome wxnut!

I'll be somewhat vague as well, but I work in a broadcast medium in a Top 5, albeit, not in an on-air role. If you care to chat, let me know.
 
I can appreciate your position. I was in the same situation for a while. High profile, and in a situation that would have been seriously ruined if it was known. (Pastor) Sure cuts down on your sexual activity, while at the same time makes it difficult to do good solid preaching when there are all those hot daddies out there in the congregation.
Finally gave it up, came out, and felt much better.
Not all can walk away from where they are, and that's OK. Just know what it felt like for me. Good!
 
I'm guessing you're a meteorologist for a television news station in a major market.

I went to school for meteorology but not in the broadcasting side of things...yet. I know of a famous weatherman in the Chicago area, it might be a good idea to drop him a line thru that stations website...I'm sure you know who I'm talking about.

If you would like to chat let me know!!!
 
Welcome to JUB. :)
 
I'm in a similar situation as you. I don't know if the audience is the same, or the same size, but let's just say I'm in the same ballpark.

I'm out. Everyone at work knows. I don't know how much of the audience knows, although I'm guessing a decent chunk. I'm not all that effeminate, but I do have some traits that are perhaps somewhat femmy, and I don't make any effort to hide them. I bring my partner to public events, and have even referenced him publicly. If people track me down on myspace or facebook, I'm listed as "gay". So anybody whose paying attention, or does the research, will know I'm gay.

And I discovered what I thought all along. When I treat it like it's no big deal, everyone else treats it like it's no big deal.

Lex
 
Well... OK, so I'm a higher-profile porn maker now.

But back in my previous life I was on TV in Canada. I was a regular panelist on a show called "The Chat Room" which was kinda like Politically Incorrect.

That said, I was even out then. My schtick was that I was Canadian TV's first gay metal head. I know a lot of gay people who have higher-profile jobs and they keep it kinda quiet. But not sure if I can help you much.
 
What sort of "high profile" job in 2010 still requires one to be closeted?!?
 
wxnut01 said:
Hi I am brand new to the forum but have lurked for a little bit. I posted the following in the new members section but I figure I would repost here too. I am going to remain pretty anonymous because of my job but I wanted to say hi to everyone on here. I work in a very public job where thousands of people watch me every evening and am hoping some other media people post on here because I am going through some stuff right now. I don't have other close gay friends in my profession but if there are any out there and willing to talk to someone please let me know. I'm 32 so I don't know if that counts as a "boy" as the website says but I'm very youthful and stay fit and active. Thanks in advance! I'd rather keep what's going on between other people in a similar profession too because I don't know what to do right now. I hope someone on here can help!

Wxnut.
Click to expand...
I guess the big thing is how you want others to perceive you. You can do a few things:

1. Stay closeted (Deny)
2. Don't Ask, Don't Tell (Don't Lie, if asked)
3. Advertise (well, advertise)

Take a look at your surrounds. What is the climate like in the industry you work in. Is it conservative? Have any of your co workers mentioned gay friends? Maybe change it up, bring a lesbian friend to a work party and see how they react.

The bottom line is, we're all here for you here. (I'm new myself). If you want to chat things up, just send me a PM. I get them in my emails and I know to get my butt back online.

A
 
Anderson Cooper isn't a very well kept secret. ;)

That said, depending on the market, and the nature of the show, it can still be an issue. I'm not in media, but I had a very high profile job where I was the face of my company (Fortune 50). I presented at conferences, took CEO's out, and closed large deals. I don't trigger people's gaydar, but my policy has always been to be honest. Some of my co-workers knew, some didn't. I never lied, but never made an issue of it.
 
Hatter said:
There's a guy on the local morning news who's also gay, and no one seems to have a problem with it. He's the news guy that they send out to promote local events. Funniest moment was when they sent him out to a deer hunters breakfast with all these older macho hunters. Funny because he is a little bit fem, and really young, and a little bit flaming at times, so seeing him interviewing all these grizzled hunter types was a hoot =)
Click to expand...
That sounds like a good laugh! Do you have a link to the clip of it?

Let's not forget the British CNN Traveler, Richard Quest, is of our persuasion as well.

If the guy was watchable, I would watch him. If he is just way out there like a drag queen on stage, I would switch the channel and watch someone less flamboyant.

A
 
wxnut01 said:
I'm 32 so I don't know if that counts as a "boy" as the website says but I'm very youthful and stay fit and active.
Click to expand...

Just fyi, JUB is for all ages. Many members here are much older than you. ;)
 
Let's not try to speculate who WXnut01 is. Obviously he or she is on here and looking for some anonymity. If we can respect that, I think he/she would be more receptive to the advice we give.

A
 
Let's say I see not thousands but hundreds of people everyday at work (teacher). I never really tried to hide my sexual orientation but never published it either, if people asked me I answered back being completely honest. It didn't turn out that well my idea of being honest with everyone; I didn't get fired yet I had to quit. Let's say that I just couldn't put up with all the crap about being the "gay" teacher for everybody and all that it implies. So, since then I sleep on it before telling people close to work about my orientation and it's been quite helpful. Plus, if there's any other teacher out there, I decided that it's much easier if you work with adults in the case that suddenly everybody finds out, so I changed my field.
 
Well, I wouldn't exactly call my position "high profile" (I am a financial adviser), it definitely is professional. I deal with clients on the phone and in person and attend conferences and panels (but don't really speak at them). It comes down to keeping business and pleasure (or work and social life) separate. Being gay is just one aspect of our personalities and as long as you do go around flaunting your personal life at work, most people don't care.

As I told my bosses when I first had the 'gay' talk with them; 'Does me being gay affect my job performance in any way?' They said 'no' and we just left it at that. The worse thing you can do is deny it. There is probably a good chance that many people you work with expect you are gay anyways.
 
Thanks for all the replies folks, a very ecclectic and unique splattering of individuals from all sorts of work environments I can see post on here. I am going to remain completely anonymous. Oh, and you can be a "weather nut" without being the weather man so don't just jump to conclusions! I am going to feel things out for the time being, it just sucks SO bad to want to start dating and have to be so careful about it. I also try to stay away from message forums where they discuss who is on tv, who is doing what. There are a lot of local gossip sites people frequent in my area. I figure the less I know about what people are saying, the better-because very few people know the real me. I guess being 32 and watching friends of mine go off get married have kids is making me realize the clock is always ticking, and I think now is the time to find that special someone (who is out there, somewhere).
 
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