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Apalling message I got on Adam4Adam

Before you kiss him, make sure he uses breath spray...
 
And "bizarre fetishes" like bisexuality are funny to some guys.

So what's your point?


Making fun of someone's fetish in a public forum isn't funny.

I don't care what the fetish is.

So, you're disgusted. Move on. Be an adult.

Don't expect anyone to share their kinky side with you once they find out you pull stuff like this.

Enjoy your vanilla world.

You don't care what the fetish is, but I think that oversimplifies things. Not all fetishes are equal. Some, even if not shared or taken seriously, can be appreciated as amusing and harmless. For instance, sex dressed up in fur suits as Japanese-style animated cartoon animals. Pointless, harmless, unerotic to me but if it amuses you, go to town. Licking an emerging turd and then eating it may appear to you to be another run of the mill fetish, but to me it appears to have more in common with indicators of mental illness.

Incidentally, I'm sure that if my boyfriend's kinky side means dressing up like batman and robin or wearing some kind of leatherman outfit, I would find it silly but easy to share with him. If he seriously wanted to take a dump in my mouth, he would be my ex-boyfriend. So yes, people can share some "kinks" and not others. Or people can share some kinks, and leave their mental problems for their shrinks, and not indulge them on Adam 4 Adam.
 
It's probably good that he was upfront about his fetish.
 
There is a lot of trolls on that website and they
ignore everything you say. I just block like 90% of the people.
If you don't block them they keep sending messages.

I don't put down anybody for their fetish but
most people are not into shitting so sending a random
message to somebody about you licking shit is probabbly
going to gross them out.
 
Exactly.

I'm disgusted by some of the judgmental responses I'm reading here. Who are you to try to call someone 'sick' when a good number of society would view you the same way for fucking men? It's so depressing to see such intelligent people harbor such idiotic biases.

Ranking fetishes (acceptable to unacceptable) and what gets someone off sexually is pretty damn stupid. No matter how 'gross' you may find things...it doesn't make someone less than a human for finding pleasure in them.

I don't 'get' how someone can shove a metal rod in their dick, but I don't think something is 'wrong' with them for doing so. And as crazy as it seems to me, I know that it's MY problem...no theirs.

*sigh* wow...
Yeah. I agree completely. Never been more disappointed by something I had read here.
 
What pleasure do people get out of having shit on their face? Isn't the smell enough to make them puke? Maybe Madonna can answer this for us considering he's become the poster boy of scat on this forum.

You do realize that most straight men feel the exact same way about things you do in bed. To each his own.
 
You don't care what the fetish is, but I think that oversimplifies things. Not all fetishes are equal. Some, even if not shared or taken seriously, can be appreciated as amusing and harmless. For instance, sex dressed up in fur suits as Japanese-style animated cartoon animals. Pointless, harmless, unerotic to me but if it amuses you, go to town. Licking an emerging turd and then eating it may appear to you to be another run of the mill fetish, but to me it appears to have more in common with indicators of mental illness.

Incidentally, I'm sure that if my boyfriend's kinky side means dressing up like batman and robin or wearing some kind of leatherman outfit, I would find it silly but easy to share with him. If he seriously wanted to take a dump in my mouth, he would be my ex-boyfriend. So yes, people can share some "kinks" and not others. Or people can share some kinks, and leave their mental problems for their shrinks, and not indulge them on Adam 4 Adam.

I don't know if it's because I'm from Edmonton too, but I totally share this viewpoint bankside.

I have a few things of my own I like (rough play, wrestling, smaller guy dominating bigger guy), but they're sort of side things and not required for me to have an orgasm or enjoy sex. But if someone does require some strange things, I think I could handle it if it was harmless and didn't totally gross me out.

There are some things I'd never consider doing and find them appalling:

For example, ingesting/mixing blood or shit. Not only is it beyond gross, but the risk of disease is very high. Things like as E. coli, Hepatitis A, Hepatitis E, pneumonia, influenza, and polio. Not to mention intestinal parasites.

Or that whole vampire thing where people actually drink each other's blood. Not even remotely safe or healthy.
 
No one said they were less than human. At least I didn't see it.

It's just pretty gross and disgusting. And people have to right to express their disgust.

They can do whatever they want, I'm not going to call the moral authority on them but I'd be a hypocrite if I didn't express my opinions about it.

Seek out people that enjoy that crap. Oops, I said crap. lol
By this logic, you think that anyone who finds homosexually abhorrent and revolting should be able to say so publicly, regardless of how completely offensive and ignorant it is.

I have absolutely no intention of letting anyone take a hershey squirt on any part of my body at any point in my life. That being said, I also don't condemn another person for wanting to do it. Isn't spreading intolerance and disgust for what we do not personally appreciate what we are supposed to be completely opposed to, as gay people?

I feel like posts like yours set us back decades.
 
I don't personally care that you find it disgusting. I just thought I would point out the venomous message that you are sending.

Forget I said anything. Perhaps I took your post for more than it was.

Take care.
 
Making fun of someone's fetish in a public forum isn't funny.

I don't care what the fetish is.

So, you're disgusted. Move on. Be an adult.

Don't expect anyone to share their kinky side with you once they find out you pull stuff like this.

Enjoy your vanilla world.

Unfortunately, that can work both ways.

I am quite happy in my 'vanilla world', and you seem to have an issue if people DON'T want anything more.

I find some of the extreme things I see and hear about offputting, disturbing and disgusting. That is my opinion.

A culture of 'anything goes' where you turn a blind eye to EVERYTHING is not wise.

I'm disgusted by some of the judgmental responses I'm reading here. Who are you to try to call someone 'sick' when a good number of society would view you the same way for fucking men? It's so depressing to see such intelligent people harbor such idiotic biases.

Ranking fetishes (acceptable to unacceptable) and what gets someone off sexually is pretty damn stupid. No matter how 'gross' you may find things...it doesn't make someone less than a human for finding pleasure in them.

I don't 'get' how someone can shove a metal rod in their dick, but I don't think something is 'wrong' with them for doing so. And as crazy as it seems to me, I know that it's MY problem...no theirs.

*sigh* wow...

I will be as 'judgemental' as I want.

Are you so accepting of rape, torture, asphyxiation, knives, blood, etc. if it is 'fetishised'?

Lines should be drawn somewhere. Otherwise, you risk accepting ever-increasing questionable behaviour. And as bankside says, at some point you MUST start to question a person's state of mind.

I find many things beyond what is called 'vanilla' to be distasteful and unneccessary.

And I will not be changing my mind on that.
 
That's dating sites for ya :D

I honestly think text talk is way worse then someone asking for scat though. But that's just me.
 
I will be as 'judgemental' as I want.

Are you so accepting of rape, torture, asphyxiation, knives, blood, etc. if it is 'fetishised'?

Lines should be drawn somewhere. Otherwise, you risk accepting ever-increasing questionable behaviour. And as bankside says, at some point you MUST start to question a person's state of mind.

I find many things beyond what is called 'vanilla' to be distasteful and unneccessary.

I will not be changing my mind on that.
I would just like to point out that your listed 'fetishised' actions would be, under most circumstances, medically detrimental and potentially quite harmful. I am unaware of the health details surrounding a scat fetish, but I am very doubtful that they fall in line with bleeding or near-suffocation. Pointing out extreme scenarios and then attempting to debunk the entire idea of fetishism is ineffective, and doesn't make you look like a particularly tolerant person. That is just what I think.

But, judging from how you worded your post and some specific things you wrote, I don't see a lot of point in continuing any further discussion.

Hun...all we can do is just shake our heads, hope that certain individuals become more accepting and understanding of people's differences, and keep it moving.
Fair enough. I suppose that's all, then.
 
>>>For the same reason that some guys can take being urinated on...or being humiliated.

Or wearing a fursuit.
Or wearing a superhero costume.
Or wearing a latex suit.
Or wearing a diaper.
Or getting tied up.
Or tying somebody else up.
Or doing it outside.
Or doing it in the shower.
Or doing it on the kitchen table.
Or doing it with another guy.

You find what turns you on, and you run with it.

Lex

I think I've narrowed my "do again" list down to six, maybe seven of these.

As for the original point of the thread, I suppose you could say it was nonconsensual - having to see an unwanted offensive message without adequate warning so it could be deleted. (Like when people put "scat" in the thread titles here - people give their consent by clicking on it and shouldn't complain if they do so.) There's some logic to sending the message to everyone and not caring if some are offended. If he gets one taker, it was worth it. Selfish, but logical, unless of course he never considered that someone might be offended. That's just oblivious.

As for drawing the line on "acceptable" fetishes - plenty of other replies here that covered this.
 
The degree of high indignation here is what is offputting, not the genuine reaction of a gay man averse to scat.
I jumped the gun in my post, but this was more what I had meant to say. I would have just expected less of it here. Or perhaps this is appropriate and the reactions would have been exponentially worse were it for another audience. Do you see where I am going with this? Because I didn't see it addressed in your post. If we 'as gay people' are received with intolerance here (not to mention in other countries where we would be sentenced to death for being homosexuals), would we not be more likely to be more considerate of other seemingly outlandish concepts? I don't see anything illogical about that. Either way, it can be water under the bridge, and this does not strike personal for me as I don't share this fetish (or any fetish really, to my knowledge).

In any case, I never argued against the unhealthy/unhygienic aspects of a scat fetish and why, perhaps, it could be considered a poor choice to partake in such activity for those reasons. In fact, I agree with it. If something is unsafe or could be considered medically hazardous, then I am no more for it than you are.

As a side note, why do you mention the government?
 
I don't know if it's because I'm from Edmonton too, but I totally share this viewpoint bankside.

I have a few things of my own I like (rough play, wrestling, smaller guy dominating bigger guy), but they're sort of side things and not required for me to have an orgasm or enjoy sex. But if someone does require some strange things, I think I could handle it if it was harmless and didn't totally gross me out.

There are some things I'd never consider doing and find them appalling:

For example, ingesting/mixing blood or shit. Not only is it beyond gross, but the risk of disease is very high. Things like as E. coli, Hepatitis A, Hepatitis E, pneumonia, influenza, and polio. Not to mention intestinal parasites.

Or that whole vampire thing where people actually drink each other's blood. Not even remotely safe or healthy.

Two words regarding everything brought up: Consenting Adults.

Some perspective for ya.

Two more words: Safe, and Sane.

I've always heard that Safe, Sane, and Consensual is the gold standard for kink.

Eating poo may be consensual, but it seems to fail Safe and Sane.

However the main point I want to make here is these things don't become safe or sane just because I feel like it or someone else does. And frankly they don't fail just because I say so. If you can show me, contrary to any doctor's advice on hygiene that I've ever heard, that eating poo has no serious health consequences, then I'd change my mind on that criteria, even though it still holds no appeal for me. Same thing for "sane." I don't think someone with well-adjusted sense of self would eat poo.

MindBlast, you hit the nail on the head - health effects are just something that can be reported by doctors and compiled by statisticians. It isn't a matter of someone "feeling okay" about it.

If someone's fetish is to swap blood as part of some kind of vampire kink or whatever, it just fails the safe standard.
 
Quick, let's have sex in an active volcano. I'm feeling adventurous today.
 
I'm more offended that I have to scroll down that much more on my mouse ball to get past your signature... :p
 
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