On Topic Discussion Are promiscuous guys relationship material?

[MakeDigitalLove]

My boyfriend was promiscuous before being with me for as long as he has. Maybe that tooth infection before was his fault.

 

[Willie Boy]

So everyone that has had sex with people while single is a disease ridden ho? You know people have safe sex right?

So everyone who has had sex while single is promiscuous? Please learn to understand what you read, you just might make o fool of yourself less often.

 

[JohnnyAnger]

So everyone who has had sex while single is promiscuous? Please learn to understand what you read, you just might make o fool of yourself less often.

Firstly, according to Zombie yes. Secondly, everyone who was promiscuous has diseases? Because again, you are making yourself look a fool with all your 1950s moralising.

 

[zombiekiller]

Firstly, according to Zombie yes. Secondly, everyone who was promiscuous has diseases? Because again, you are making yourself look a fool with all your 1950s moralising.

Yes, I am saying from my point of view if you have sex and still proclaim yourself single then you are promiscuous.

And from my own personal experience, promiscuous guys cannot be trusted. They've no problem cheating at times. They don't even consider it cheating.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

hope mars colony find mars
_haaa_

tonku

 

[sixthson]

I've learned that I'm just not comfortable having casual encounters with people. If I'm going to have sex with someone, I don't need to be in love, but I need to at least be dating them. It can't be solely physical.

So, I've often felt that guys who are promiscuous aren't relationship material. To me, it suggests that they can't commit to one person, would likely cheat on me, and think of sex in a very nonchalant way.

What do you guys think? Are my concerns valid? Am I being judgmental? Should I give someone like that a chance? Let me know.

If you like someone and care about them, you probably should give them a chance.

I think maybe you are asking if someone who has lead a promiscuous life can ever be happy in a monogamous one?

I guess anything is possible, but I have to say I wonder how many guys can just turn that off so easily. I suppose age would be a factor. Someone 50 might be ready for one person, but someone 29, maybe not. It's very individual.

Do you have a particular guy in mind, Mr. Mojo?

 

[luckynumbah7]

How about you just repeat/show your original post to any promiscuous people you might have an interest in. They'll weed themselves out, I promise you.

 

[MakeDigitalLove]

Yes, I am saying from my point of view if you have sex and still proclaim yourself single then you are promiscuous.

And from my own personal experience, promiscuous guys cannot be trusted. They've no problem cheating at times. They don't even consider it cheating.

And apparently non promiscuous guys have no problem being judgmental towards other people based solely on their own experiences.

 

[kallipolis]

So, I've often felt that guys who are promiscuous aren't relationship material. To me, it suggests that they can't commit to one person, would likely cheat on me, and think of sex in a very nonchalant way.

I have always avoided virgins, and those saving themselves for a white knight to sweep them off their feet.

If I have to choose between a self confessed sinner, and a saint.....I'll always choose the sinner, for their practical experience makes them a suitable partner to work with towards growing a happy, and monogamous loving relationship....also, knowing that he, and I are wise to the pitfalls of returning to meeting multiple sexual partners.....loving ones partner also encourages patience, understanding, and forgiveness when inevitably, differences arise....

 

[bankside]

Yes, I am saying from my point of view if you have sex and still proclaim yourself single then you are promiscuous.

And from my own personal experience, promiscuous guys cannot be trusted. They've no problem cheating at times. They don't even consider it cheating.

Picture two people, one who plays around having random hook-ups while he's single and then decides to go for a long term relationship, the other guy prefers to have no sex until he is in a relationship, or he at least prefers to see a clear potential of a relationship before getting physical with someone he's still getting to know.

These people are using the same words, and it sounds like they maybe mean the same thing when they say "long term relationship." But they are pretty much in different planets about what a relationship means.

This is not a cause for alarm if everyone understands that, but pretending it's the same usually leads to dissatisfaction.

 

[luckynumbah7]

Yes, you're judge mental, no, nobody cares. You're free to think whatever you want and others are free to say you're being short sighted, have bad information, are doing a credible impersonation of a man with his head shoved so far up his ass he'll be spending thousands on a proctologist and a stick for leverage, ect ect.

The thing is, most reasonable adults don't want to date (or fuck) people who are incompatible. I'd rather you weed yourself out of others options by being honest. It saves you coming back in six months bitching about when your monogamous man (and yes, I do mean monogamous) cheated on you and it must be because he couldn't keep his legs closed. You'll be blaming a bad relationship on how much sex he had before you met him instead of sneaking, lieing behavior and the willfully shitty hiding of feelings about a spouses past history and deliberate nn-communication of your thoughts and feelings in a new relationship.

And you want to start off by asking if new relationship should be based on you lieing about what you consider moral behavior.

No. It shouldn't.

 

[zombiekiller]

And apparently non promiscuous guys have no problem being judgmental towards other people based solely on their own experiences.

Are you saying that being promiscuous and being untrustworthy are bad things? Because I don't recall ever saying these are bad traits.

I'm neutral about promiscuity. If certain guys want to sleep around with no commitment attached, I say go for it. More power to them. It's simply not for me.

I've talked to many guys in real life about their feelings on this. Most of the time, promiscuous guys don't even consider what I would call cheating cheating. In fact, many of them seem to be quite proud of the fact that they sleep around while being in a relationship with someone. Again, I don't think it's a good or bad thing. If they want to do it, more power to them.

I'm not judging. I'm just telling how it is.

 

[zombiekiller]

Picture two people, one who plays around having random hook-ups while he's single and then decides to go for a long term relationship, the other guy prefers to have no sex until he is in a relationship, or he at least prefers to see a clear potential of a relationship before getting physical with someone he's still getting to know.

These people are using the same words, and it sounds like they maybe mean the same thing when they say "long term relationship." But they are pretty much in different planets about what a relationship means.

This is not a cause for alarm if everyone understands that, but pretending it's the same usually leads to dissatisfaction.

Believe it or not, I understand. I've talked with enough promiscuous guys to understand the mentality.

Through a friend of a friend, I once met this young guy that I really liked. I was willing to jump through hoops for him. Then after having taken him out to dinner several times, I realized that I would just end up getting hurt. Why? Because he was telling me about his last relationship and how it ended. He and his ex got a place together. Behind his ex's back, he would go out and have sex with random guys. When his ex found out, it didn't end well. He then complained to me that his ex was too uptight and wouldn't understand that it wasn't really cheating since he had no feelings for those random guys.

Before you jump on me for using this 1 example to build my case, let me say that it wasn't the first or last time I heard from such attitude in life.

Let me repeat. I don't think there is anything wrong with being promiscuous or being untrustworthy. The reason I would not go for a promiscuous guy is because chances are he won't even consider cheating as cheating.

 

[MakeDigitalLove]

Not being trustworthy is definitely a bad trait I don't know where anyone would consider that a good one.

You have made the opinion that people who are single and having sex are promiscuous. Which would mean everyone who has sex when single is not trustworthy. Is this true? But it seems you exclude yourself from this category.

 

[luckynumbah7]

Not being trustworthy is definitely a bad trait I don't know where anyone would consider that a good one.

You have made the opinion that people who are single and having sex are promiscuous. Which would mean everyone who has sex when single is not trustworthy. Is this true? But it seems you exclude yourself from this category.

They always do. I'm waiting for gay tops to start repeating "No sex while dating (for thee), you should wait until marriage" because who'll buy the cow if the milk is for free.

Because no one's heard that before.

 

[zombiekiller]

Not being trustworthy is definitely a bad trait I don't know where anyone would consider that a good one.

You have made the opinion that people who are single and having sex are promiscuous. Which would mean everyone who has sex when single is not trustworthy. Is this true? But it seems you exclude yourself from this category.

Did I say it was a good trait? I said I consider it a neutral trait. I say this because I've had guys tell me I couldn't trust them.

And I've also said that being promiscuous is neither good nor bad. It's neutral. It's you who are insisting it's bad.

Let me repeat. I don't think there is anything wrong with being promiscuous. Just don't try to deny what it is. If you sleep around and still proclaim yourself to be single, that's the very definition of being promiscuous.

 

[zombiekiller]

They always do. I'm waiting for gay tops to start repeating "No sex while dating (for thee), you should wait until marriage" because who'll buy the cow if the milk is for free.

Because no one's heard that before.

Speak for yourself. I've always waited until we've officially started dating.

 

[tarallucci]

No, I don't think they are.

 

[MakeDigitalLove]

I don't think being promiscuous is a bad thing. I wouldn't be with my boyfriend for 10 years if I thought that it mattered because it doesn't. Not being trust worthy is not a good trait and people don't associate not being trustworthy anything but being a bad trait because it is. All you are doing is back pedaling.

 

[bankside]

Speak for yourself. I've always waited until we've officially started dating.

Find a guy that enjoys that particular fact and make him happy. Don't date the people who don't get it.