Are/were you out to your grandparents?

[TickTockMan]

If so how did it come about?

 

[BillyT]

No, my Grandparents passed away in my childhood.

 

[Charon]

Yes, they don't mind, they still love me.

 

[Daximus]

Nope. They all passed before I was ready.

 

[Pianist]

Nope, nor my parents. They and my father up and died afore I came out... which was when I was 47.

My mother and I were not on speaking terms, then she up and died too. So she never knew either.

 

[NotHardUp1]

My grandmother was born in 1910. She lived to be 91 and was very progressive and intellectual. She talked of psychology, sexuality, and was not disposed to emotionalism. However, the prevailing psychology of the day attributed homosexuality to dysfunctional parenting. As she was my surrogate parent, and it was more than obviously so, she would have blamed herself while telling me how OK it was. I know this from conversations we had about my mother, and Grandmother let it slip out that she blamed herself for how Mother turned out.

So, I decided that it would have been great to be out to her, but it would have made her unhappy, and I chose to avoid it instead.

 

[Cormac135]

Long dead before i was born.

 

[MakeDigitalLove]

Unfortunately my Grandma passed away before I actually did come out. And unfortunately I assumed that my Grandfather wouldn't understand and I never told him. I regret that and should have given the benefit of the doubt.

 

[rareboy]

My one grandmother knew my partner.

She was cool with it.

 

[tarallucci]

I only remember my grandmothers and they died when I was 12, I have only seen pictures of my grandfathers.

Even if they were alive today I doubt I would tell them. My parents wouldn't take it well, imagine my grandparents

 

[lambdaboy]

When I first got together with my partner his father and mother could care less and loved us. One day he said to my partner his son try not to look so gay which of course got him mad. His fathers mother lived in the apartment next to us when she heard the yelling she came over and said who cares my sister was a lesbian she was 80 years old lol. After that his father never told us to do anything but be happy and proud life is too short to hide! all my grand parents and dad had died before I came out my mom never cred.

 

[JohnnyAnger]

All my grandparents were died by the time I was 20, so it never came up with them.

My grandmother was born in 1910.

My paternal grandmother was born the same year, yet we have an age difference of at least 25 years ish I believe. Strange huh.

 

[roadtripboy]

My grandparents died before I came out. But they say you're grandma always knows. If you visited my grandmother while the soaps where on you had to watch with her. She used to ask me which male actors I thought were the best looking. So I think she might have had a clue.

 

[ronboy]

My grandmother knew before my parents did.
I never had to say anything to her.
When my Vincent died, she told me that she knew that I loved him the same way she loved my grandfather.
She was a wise woman and a modern thinker.

 

[NotHardUp1]

My paternal grandmother was born the same year, yet we have an age difference of at least 25 years ish I believe. Strange huh.

You don't look 80.

But seriously, I guess your grandparents had your father at a significantly later age. My mother was born in 1931, so her mother was 21 at the time. She had me at age 30, so perhaps you are a younger child of a younger child.

 

[luckynumbah7]

That's not really applicable - both grandfathers are dead, one grandmother has dementia (as of last year) and I haven't seen the other in years as she's a bit too old to be leaving Florida on regular trips. And I suspect she also has dementia now. I'm sure she knew, however, as one of my aunts got the lecture of her life last time I was down for being insulting. I was a bit surprised, grandma barely waited till I was out the door to rip into her. Usually she's the mellowest person you'd care to meet.

 

[jbrown329]

My grandmother knew and didn't care. My grandfather never did.

 

[JohnnyAnger]

You don't look 80.

But seriously, I guess your grandparents had your father at a significantly later age. My mother was born in 1931, so her mother was 21 at the time. She had me at age 30, so perhaps you are a younger child of a younger child.

Yes it's true on both sides of my family really. My maternal grandparents were born in 1908 and 1910, while my maternal grandparents were born in 1916 and 1918 - while I was born way off in 1990. I doubt that there are many in my generation with that spread!

 

[Alnitak]

Grandfather, yes, and he was fine with it. The other three passed away before I came out.

 

[sixthson]

My sister in law outed me to my family and I didn't know it when I went to a family reunion. I had my bf with me and my family had met him before and thought he was a friend. I couldn't figure out why so many were cool toward me until my uncle, who was a minister, started to make unkind remarks and ugly jokes about "queers". My other uncle laughed and so did my brothers. Then a brother took great delight in telling me every knew. After more than a few nasty remarks from others, I told my bf we were leaving.
As we left, the last face I saw was my grandmother and she just looked at me. My grandmother defended her grandchildren all the time even when they did wrong, but she never stood up for me. I figured then that being gay was indefensible. I felt humiliated and hated. I didn't see any of them for nearly 3 years, but when I went to see my Grandma, I told her how hurt I was for her not supporting me. She said "It's just wrong what you are doing and I can't pretend otherwise, but I will always love you".
I love my Grandmother more than anyone in the family and it hurt. I have to say I understood why she believed what she did, but it didn't help me feel much better. My Grandpa died before that and he never knew.