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are you hitting on me?

trikky

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Ok the above phrase is one you yankee boys use, but is not really used in the UK. I wonder if you guys could decipher it's meaning for us non yanks. I always believed it to mean showing an interest in someone.

Does the phrase suggest that the interest in unwelcomed or does that depend on the emphasis? I asked this of someone in an email a couple of months ago and he got really offended. Hope you can clear this up. thanks
 
I've never heard anybody use this question in response to someone's advances in the UK, but I have heard the term "to hit on someone" used quite frequently.

You're right, it does have the meaning of showing interest. Whether this interest is welcomed or not is dependent on the person being chatted up and their reaction to the particular guy - as is usual in these situations.
 
I have only seen this used in a joking way to express that somebody seems to be going out of his way to do something nice for you ..
Like "you did this nice thing for me .. are you hitting on me?". Or "you didn't have to pay lunch, are you sure you aren't hitting on me?"

but then again .. I'm no native speaker ;)
 
Yeah, being hit on means that the other guy is showing interest by being nice/using complements/that sort of thing. So the meaning of "Are you hitting on me?" really depends upon the tone the question is asked with. Playful face = ask to get a cup of coffee with them. Weird face = retreat, regroup and try again.
 
Hitting on someone is basically blatant flirting with the intent of it leading somewhere (either to a date or sex, or something of that nature).
 
but if you ask someone if they are hitting on you does that necessarily imply that the advance is unwelcome or is it down to how it is expressed?
 
but if you ask someone if they are hitting on you does that necessarily imply that the advance is unwelcome or is it down to how it is expressed?

It means that the person is being nice to you or doing things for you for the express purpose of showing their attraction to you or chatting you up because they are attracted to you. Usually, it's leading up to them asking you for a date or making advances toward you for sex. The advances can be either welcome or unwelcome.
 
but if you ask someone if they are hitting on you does that necessarily imply that the advance is unwelcome or is it down to how it is expressed?

It's just a question.. no hidden meaning implied... basically it the guy asking the question is saying 'are you trying to take me to bed, or are you trying to have just have sex'... simple question.
 
Ok the above phrase is one you yankee boys use, but is not really used in the UK. I wonder if you guys could decipher it's meaning for us non yanks. I always believed it to mean showing an interest in someone.

Does the phrase suggest that the interest in unwelcomed or does that depend on the emphasis? I asked this of someone in an email a couple of months ago and he got really offended. Hope you can clear this up. thanks

Let me be clear. Nobody would say "Are you hitting on me" if they didnt have SOME interest OR they were joking with you. Usually its BOTH.

They DO NOT expect a frank reponse such as "Yes" but want you do to it more. If you do continue "hitting on them" and they take it badly, then obviously they didnt want that kind of attention.
 
It means exactly the same as "are you flirting with me?"

It has all the same usages and everything depends on the context and tone.
 
Actually I draw a distinction between flirting with someone and hitting on them.

Flirting sometimes isn't intended to go anywhere, at least not immediately.

Hitting on someone definitely has an immediate agenda. If someone is hitting on me, I assume they're after a hook-up, not a romantic dinner.

Someone’s flirting might be a prelude to an actual date, but maybe not, flirting is a lot less obvious than getting hit on. Less direct.

Plus I think that getting hit on is more physical. If a guy came up to me at the bar, put his arm around my waist, then got into my head-space and asked if he could buy me a beer - that I would consider being hit on, and there's nothing flirty about it. I'd also consider it a more or less immediate invitation to get off, and I'd process that with different criteria than I would a guy who's flirting with me over the dinner table.
 
im not a native english speaker, but i mostly live in an english language enviroment. for me, "hitting on" is exactly synonymous with "coming on to" and "making a move on".

i use the phrase either a) as a ironic, mostly rethorical question towards friends in situation when its clear that no sexual intentions are involved. translation: "wow, youre being very nice to me, more than ususal. it makes me slightly suspicious. do you want somethig from me? or are you just being nice? anyway, i appreciate it."

or b) as an actual question, when im not sure wether a person i is, well, hitting on me. maybe i like it, maybe i dont... but anyway, i want some clarity so i can react appropriatly (either "oh, um, im afraid i dont feel that way" or "fantastic! lets have a drink later this evening!")
 
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