baby gay: an introduction.

[Seasoned]

Thomas,

I can promise you things will get better if you are willing to take risks, small ones at first, one at a time. You have to find a way to like yourself more, or why would anyone else want to? It might serve some purpose to call your mother a fucking bitch and not be happy with your dad, but moving away won't make those feelings go away.

You may need some therapy. You certainly need some friends. It's time to join some group or organization to make that happen.

Right now you are a bundle of feelings. Those need to be identified and worked through. I'm glad you found jub. Welcome. Please come back here often. I have enough ideas for you to last several weeks. PM me if you like.

 

[hothunk222]

is this a joke?

 

[rareboy]

You're right. It isn't the first time we've read this tale.

Let me see if I have this right.

You're 18.

You hate your mother.

You wish for a Daddy. But not really.

But you cam to fish for compliments from guys as old as...omg....54.

You're a pessimist....no, wait,....a realist. But you don't believe in love...but maybe it exists....because you've never experienced it.

You want a boyfriend...but don't want to talk to anyone and aren't desperate enough to look for someone online....which would only be a waste because everybody else in the world already has everyone they need in their lives.

How am I doing so far?

I understand that you are very young and emotionally immature, but having crossed the magic line of 18, it is time for you to think about what kind of a man, instead of what kind of a child you want to be.

You apparently have real anger and abandonment issues, compounded with low self-esteem. You are socially isolated.
I suspect that you make yourself really unpleasant to be around, hence the lack of friends and growing isolation.

I don't think you are going to be emotionally healthy until you get some real counselling help. If you continue on the path that you're on, you will have a very unhappy life. There is still time to undo the damage.

 

[kdskid2004]

get into college / university.. all problems solved.. i promise

 

[hylas]

honey, first things first: it will get better. being a teenager can be hell, and i recognize so much of what youre saying from my own hellish teenage years. the most important thing is that you learn to be comfortable with yourself. its not gonna happen over-night, but work on becomming the person you want to be - not just the looks, but also character and social skills - and you will one day look into the mirror and be surprised just how awesome/handsome/beloved you are. promise!

it feels like everyone is already well settled with their own lives to let someone new in anyway.

oh, theyre not. sure, teenage years are harder for some than for others, but they are a confusing, complicated time for everybody. those guys calling you a fag, for example? they wouldnt do that if they were truly comfortable with themselves. they are either self-hating closets, or they feel so socially insecure that they give in to peer pressure, or they are so unhappy that they have to make others feel bad to make themselves feel good. (none of which excuses their behaviour, just explains)

and i'm not desperate enough to look for friends or a boyfriend on the internet.

dont be a snob like that. the internet has its own flaws and dangers, but its a great place to get to know fellow faggots.

i might as well off myself now seeing how much of a joke my life is.

oh yeah, and lose the self pity. lose it right now. seriously, its very unattractive. i know its not all great but you have to try to make it great, as opposed to wallowing in your miserie. you dont have to be a hysterical optimist, but being that pessimistic will become your self-fulfilling prophecy. would you like to be with a person that whiny? work on becoming a person youd like to be with.

 

[Reality101]

I agree with most of what rareboy said just without all the judgment and high horse undertones. What he said was blunt but based on your first post I suspect that there is a lot of truth in it. In your situation and with your mindset it would do you no good to coddle or "poor baby" you. Someone mentioned going to college and that is great advice. Also, there is nothing desperate about making friends online especially if you tend to be a little shy or introverted. Making friends online can help to open you up and you will likely learn a thing or two about yourself and other people. Another thing, work to not be so closed off around people. Get out of your head about it! You are very young so also like rareboy said it's not too late. Msg me anytime too. I don't bite.

 

[hotatlboi]

get into college / university.. all problems solved.. i promise

totally agree.

College greatly helped me with accepting my identity as a gay person and developing a positive attitude and outlook apart from the bullshit projected by my asshole parents.