Be the Person You Want to Date?

[erobert]

I've been thinking about the concepts of "like attracts like" and also "opposites attract" and thinking of the people I would like to date- but I'm not at a point in my life where I would like to be (thank you delayed adolescence)

What I've noticed of couples who are dating (no matter their sexuality) is they are more similar than not, not in terms of looks but in terms of expectations of themselves and what they are looking for in life. That makes sense. As my psychology professor said, "Opposites do attract but they don't always stay together".

On the other hand you don't want to be a clone of the other person (like that Seinfeld episode) as the relationship may get boring.

What do you think, be yourself? Be the person you want to date? Be both?

 

[BINOWGAYLATER]

My tag line is :

Be the kind of person your dog THINKS you are !!

 

[kevbo]

You shouldn't be anything but yourself. If you get into a relationship while trying to be the type of person you want to date, it's a bit dishonest. A person should know the true person that they're getting involved with...

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

What do you think, be yourself? Be the person you want to date? Be both?

Be the person you want to date; what works for predators in the insect kindom should work for you.

 

[Telstra]

You can't be
"Be the Person You Want to Date"

Too much work and your not yourself.

 

[erobert]

The Matter Of Splatter, "qualities" is the word I was looking for when I was thinking of what to title this thread.

Be yourself but have certain qualities you're looking for in another person. That makes more sense.

Now, does like attracts like? I think so. Although, I've seen complimentary couples too.

 

[saymyname]

It sounds like you are blurring the lines a bit between having similar goals as someone and having similar temperaments or personality traits. For example, I'm usually emotionally attracted to guys with opposite character traits or opposite temperaments than myself. That is, someone not SO in touch with their emotions, someone that's a little bit more optimistic or well adjusted than me, someone not so critical, someone not so intellectual, etc. I've tried to date people with those same temperaments and there's just no spark. So for me, they have to have a different character like that, but what's important and sustaining is if we have the same goals: wanting to see the world, live in other places, big emphasis on beauty and art and culture, etc. I could never "be the person" I want to date because those kinds of people are radically different than me, but they're attracted to my differences too.