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Because one day I could be him.

Regardless of us being gay or not, anyone could eventually end up in such a situation. We ALL should be more pro-active in this.

You did a great thing, Jasun. You have a muffin basket waiting for you in heaven now! :D

No, you really did a good thing. We should take that as an example.
 
That was great of you, Jasun... some times we just need a little help, and it's comforting to know that there are still people out there who are still willing to reach out and do so.
 
Damn it Jasun. :grrr:

You make it really really hard not to actually... LIKE you, you know... :rolleyes:

Your sense of right and wrong is tuned perfectly... as is your porportion, perspective, and justice. Pretty much always has been as far as I can tell.







And its ok... as for me admitting all this stuff out loud I promise to take it all back if asked... #-o
 
I know that as a gay man... that could very well eventually be me in 40 years. No children, no support system, no family to look after me.

^ Those words chill me to the bone.

Because, basically, I'm in that same boat.

That's the part of being a gay man that str8 folks never think about. I have NO kids, no wife, none of that stuff that can form a support system when I grow older.

It's scary as all fuck.

That being said, (*deep breath* ;)) I remember the last stranger I gave a ride to.... I was putting air in my tires at the local BP station, and this guy -maybe 50 or so... kinda hot in a red necky way- came up to me and asked if I could give him a ride "around the corner".

Well, I don't know what came over me, but I said "Yes".

Anyway, "around the corner" proved to be about 10 miles or so. While we were talking, I told him that I usually don't pick up strangers, and I was glad he wasn't some nut that was going to stab me to death, or something.

TO which he replied, "No, I ain't gonna do that, I don't want to go back to jail again..."

:eek:

That marked the very last time I gave *anyone* a ride, anywhere.
 
I was pulling out of the parking lot at the Pleasure Chest today and while I was waiting for a space to pull into traffic, there was a quiet knock on my window.

A very old man stood there and said something. I couldn't hear. I turned off my radio and rolled down my window.

In a very thick Russian Jewish accent he asked if I could give him a ride to Fairfax. For those who don't know the area, that's about half a mile. A short walk along a rather nice city street. Not too busy and lots of Russian Jewish Mom and Pop stores along what we call "the barrel of the gun" neighbourhood in West Hollywood.

I paused for just a moment before I said "yes."

I opened the door and saw that he was walking with a cane. He very slowly and carefully got into the car. In very broken English he said the equivalent of, " Sorry. Thankyou. Been walking as long as I could and I can't go any further. I broke my back late last year."

I pulled into traffic and started to drive. It was rush hour and it took about 5 minutes.

I know that as a gay man... that could very well eventually be me in 40 years. No children, no support system, no family to look after me. Being reduced to asking someone I don't know for a ride because I just can't bring myself to walk another half a mile. And let's face it... he's a Russian Jewish man. I look like a Nazi skin head to many men his age. I'm sure I'm the last one he wanted to ask for help.

It was on my way. It didn't take me any more time than the couple minutes it took to allow him to get into and back out of the car.

But it made me feel both good and very sad.

Because one day I could be him.
Thank you Jasun, for sharing that vignette with us. You touched on some very important thoughts. I know how rewarding a feeling it is when I take time to do some simple thing that costs me little, but may save someone else's sanity.

And, be sure, but do not fear it, that sooner than you think you WILL look in the reflection and find yourself looking into your own eyes.:=D:
 
That was a sweet thing to do Jasun. I avoid driving anywhere near fairfax 24/7. Those old bluehaired woman in huge cars will mow you down, lol
 
Blessings on you, Jasun, for your big heart. I can empathize with that old guy because I seriously injured my back also and am suffering from neuropathy in my feet and can not walk without a lot of pain. I haven't been able to drive for a while,either, so I am dependent on other people to haul me around. Fortunately I have a loving husband who takes good care of me, and I will be having surgery soon to alleviate my problem. But many people are less fortunate than me, so they have to rely on guys like you. So, good on you,kind sir.
:=D:(*8*)..|mojoe
 
I had to reply to this after I read the post. Good for you Jasun! If it's any comfort to you, you're not alone in your fear. All of us, gay and straight, single and coupled, have that fear of dying alone. All that counts is how we treat each other in life and being true to yourself. I can honestly say reading your post just made my weekend!
 
Yes of course you could him one day man...

That was a very nice thing you did. What struck me most about the many response to your thread though was the fact that so many people wrote about how very kind and noble you were.

I've done many such things in my life and I figure most of the people reading that thread have done so as well. As it come to the point where a random act of kindness is considered a noble act that is rare? I hope not.

You did a good deed Jasun.... but hell man, most of us (at least I think so) have done so dozens of times too.

What I got from the thread is not the specific act of kindess but the fact that as gay guys we will be alone in later years.
We won't have children to take care of us as we age.
We may have brothers, sisters, nephews, or neices that will help us a bit. But let's face it guys... all those people will have their own things to deal with.

Their own immediate family.
I"ve been helping out my mom an dad through various doc visits, surgeries, etc. for a few years. My two bros and my sis help out as well.

My sis doesn't have kids. and shes been fighting MS for a while.
My two brothers have their own families.
So, as a gay man without my own kid I will have to fight through old age on my own.
My best buddy died 6 years ago...
Guys, we were so close.. we always figured we'd spend old age together.
Ha, he was 8 years younger than me.... he always joked that he'd end up pushing me around in the wheel chair.

We figured we'd end up in our old age together.... one of us would move in to the others house and just spend time helping eachother out.
He died suddenly at 42 years of age.

So much for that.
We were best freinds for 18 years... and I loved him.. he loved me.
We were not sexual lovers...we were just very, very close buddies....
Two people could not have been closer in life than Dan and I were.

Not having kids to help you out when you are older is just one of the things that gay guys face.
But in the case of you Jasun.... hell man, I doubt you have much to worry about...

you've got dozens of people that love you and really do treasure you.
You will be fine man, as you should be.
 
I always thought you were kinda scary, but the more of your posts I read the more I see your sweet side :kiss:
 
wow, these true stories of yours could be publish into short inspirational stories. I've definately saw your sweet side today also...before this... haha..

but yes, you are absolutely correct. We all forget to think about that one day we will become that same, slow, and weak elderly person that we all tend to be hate now when we encounter.
 
But, we don't have to be alone.

Jub has been important to me personally in many ways---I work nights and when I get home everyone is going to work while I am getting ready for bed. If I did not make myself go out and actually talk to people, I could go a week or even two without having any kind of conversation with another soul.

It is easy to start to take this site for granted and get caught up in the little dramas on it--but most of us are here to fill a need to reach out to other gay men--to share and connect.


Maybe we won't have to be alone someday.
 
So basically, rather than just helping the old man, you were pitying yourself.
 
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