Being out is...

[kramer362]

Being out is an obligation, so that youth struggling won't have nearly as hard of a time with this issue as I and others have had, when they see positive role models who are comfortable and unashamed.

 

[bluepheonix]

Being out is awesome.

 

[TX-Beau]

My best female friend has promised to geld me if I ever call her a Fag Hag.

So let's just make Stacy JUB's official Friend!

 

[TX-Beau]

Being in America means I can choose what I want to be and how much I want to disclose.

Being open minded means respecting those that choose what they want to be and what they want to disclose.

Being out is never having to decide how much of the truth to disclose.

 

[tallguy297]

Being out is...

- a paradox. Its the freedom to be who you are with those who care about you, but with the regret of not trusting them sooner.

- a sign that you have courage that a straight person will never quite understand.

- the ability to be truly honest with yourself while everyone around you continues to lie to themselves.

- the power to finally choose your path in life no matter where it leads you.

- the reason you never walk away from those who need help and support.

- never an excuse to not be you, to act a certain way, or to feel different.

- doesn't mean leaving old friends behind, it means making new ones. Don't ever think that the 2 worlds can never be one... it just takes effort.

- is the dream of those cant be - yet.

Great thread Lube!

 

[Lube]

Thanks, TallGuy. What an inspiring and thought provoking post!

 

[zachy04]

Being out is...

Crying to your best friend when you first tell them that your gay. And that your not crying cause your ashamed of being gay, but because you couldnt believe how good it feels to finally come out.

 

[Eyghon]

Being out ...

... would be a relief. It's coming out that scares the shit out of me.

All my friends know, and I came out to my brother (had to do it twice as the first time didn't take), but I still live in kind of a glass closet with the rest of my immediate family. My dad definitely knows and my sister and mother would have to be blind to have missed it, but I've never had the courage to actually say so.

It's harder, I think, because my family is so reticent about everything that simply saying the words "I'm gay" would reveal more of my love life to them than they've ever revealed to me. My brother is 29 and my sister is 32, and if they've ever been on so much as a date I've never heard about it. (Well, about a year ago my sister introduced the family to a boyfriend who was out of the picture soon thereafter, but that's the extent of it.)

I now realize this was a longer response than I had intended and will shut up now.

 

[treanir]

Being out is...

difficult, but very much worth it.

 

[Lube]

Eyghon, that was a great post. It sounds like you're not the only gay in the village--or your family!

 

[spencer]

I'd prefer to keep this a thread about the benefits of coming out--since this is, in fact, the coming out forum.

you are right this thread isn't the place for that.

But, since there is no place for the rest of us to post. I guess I can post anywhere.

But you made your point, no room at your party.
Gay on gay intolerance is the worst kind in my book.

*end of hijack.

 

[gdude30]

Being out is stopping the trend of men marrying women to fool the world that they are straight and than coming out in life later.

Being out is accepting them freedom and the gift that those before us fought for and did not have but worked so hard so that we can have it.

Being out is one of the ways to progress change and to let people see that we do exist and that we won't change who we are.

I will admit though that I'm not fully out. My parents and friends now but work and school don't know. To a certain extent it might make work and school more troublesome and end up bad for me in the long run if they did find out there. I've been asked before "Do you have a girlfriend." The answer I should give is "No I have a Master".

But I just usually respond no. Like Jasun said you don't need to scream it out but you don't need to cower in the basement.

But I feel somewhat guilty that I can't say that I have a master and that I am gay to some people. I think it's more of rational and cautious thinking that prevent that. But unfortunately that holds me back in so many other ways. So so much has to change before I can call myself truly out I suppose. But that's a work in progress. For the most part I am out. And I will work towards becoming a person who can be proud of who they are and not give a damn what others think.

It's great that gay pride is coming up soon. Actually a few weeks. A great reminder of why we are out. Great thread

 

[Lube]

Thanks, GDude.

As you saw on your first slave thread, saying you have a master--independent of any gay issues--will cause you a lot of grief because of people's misconceptions.

Would you feel comfortable saying you have a boyfriend? Sure, your master isn't technically a boyfriend, but it would let people know you're gay without all the baggage of S&M.

 

[gdude30]

Thanks, GDude.

As you saw on your first slave thread, saying you have a master--independent of any gay issues--will cause you a lot of grief because of people's misconceptions.

Would you feel comfortable saying you have a boyfriend? Sure, your master isn't technically a boyfriend, but it would let people know you're gay without all the baggage of S&M.

You know I was really nervous when I went to a social and knew lots of people there and brought my Sir. It was actually a toga party thing so that was even more intimidating. They just called him my Scottish boyfriend so I went with that. I felt kind of bad about that because I am really proud of and love my Sir but I sort of avoided the subject. But I made up for that when I went to a bar for some event with youth pride and wasn't ashamed to introduce my Sir to anyone and was proud to be there with him.

I don't think there is anything wrong with calling someone a boyfriend or partner. However, there is so much power and meaning behind the word "Master" and to just sort of cover that with a boyfriend doesn't seem right. I haven't had another chance to really introduce my master to people but if I do get a chance I will definitely call him my Master.

It's interesting you mention the thing about "S&M" baggage too. Although I'd call it more M/s. The thing is by just saying "This is my boyfriend" it completely hides the lifestyle that I'm in and everything about it. Yes some people consider themselves leather if they just wear it and model it and do nothing else. But the general idea and meaning of leather is so twisted and distorted because there aren't any real lead examples in the leather community really or the gay community.

I think by "dealing with the baggage" and admitting to it you make people aware of the existence of the leather lifestyle and that some people are masters and slaves. Regardless if the impression is good or bad to them the existence of the thought enters their mind. Than they can either reject it, explore it, or accept it. Or something else.

Basically it's the same reason to be out as gay or lesbian. It lets people know of your existence as a gay man or woman. I will admit I am not quite ready to deal with what comes of acknowledging the existence of M/s or BDSM in the open public such as school or work yet. But I think Pride will definitely change that. Hell I couldn't even admit it at Youth Pride before and I admitted it to a close friend of mine there recently. He accepted me and doesn't think anything different about me. Baby steps

 

[crowboy]

Being out is...
Something I once decided I would never be.

Being out is...
Something I started to think about.

Being out is...
Something I begun to think was possible for me.

Being out is...
WHERE I NOW WANT TO BE.

Insert a few months between each bit.

 

[lunarus]

Being out is...

Showing the rest of the world we are just like them.

Not having to focus on how I speak to others. IE. My husband and I,... instead of We went...

Kissing my man good-by without worrying about who might see it. I don't give a rat's ass any more.

Being myself unapologetically. If someone cannot handle that then that is their own shit not mine.

People knowing I am his and he is mine at work in the families and in general at functions.

Being out speaks more to the general populous than others truly realize. It is harder to outright hate on people if they are standing in front of them. Yet again you have a lot of ass hats in this world. Being out can only show those around said ass hats how wrong they really are.

Be out brothers and sisters, be out and be proud! Never allow others to dictate to you how or what you should be in this world.

Lunar

 

[Lube]

^ Great post.


Being out is...

... having lunch with your new coworkers on your first day of work, and chiming in about how many people you & your boyfriend are having to Thanksgiving dinner after several coworkers mention how many people they and their wives are having.

... having lunch with your new coworkers and mentioning your bf's family's weird Thanksgiving food traditions when your coworkers mention their spouses' families' weird food traditions.

... mentioning your & your bf's favorite Thanksgiving recipes when they mention theirs.

 

[macuser15]

So sweet.

 

[Esquire0399]

Being out is...

... very new for me and an ongoing and difficult process, but also a step that feels incredible to be finally moving past.

... being able to talk to best best female friend about the guys I like in public, amongst of huge crowd of people, and not giving a shit about what they think or the fact that they're staring.

 

[crowboy]

Being out is...
Something I once decided I would never be.

Being out is...
Something I started to think about.

Being out is...
Something I begun to think was possible for me.

Being out is...
WHERE I NOW WANT TO BE.

Insert a few months between each bit.

And now

Being out is: WHERE I AM NOW.

Being out is: so much better for me.

Being out is: enabling me to live life.

Being out is: the best thing I have done for me.

Being out is: liberating.