BF wants it all the time! :(

[slickery]

For the past couple months, my boyfriend has been wanting sex all the time.

I'm not adverse to sex, and in fact I quite enjoy it, but its been becoming a growing concern. We live about a 10 minute walk from each other, and recently have been spending almost every minute of every day together. On top of all the time we spend together, there is all the sex he constantly wants.

I feel bad because I always end up turning him down, and I know the reason is because I've just been spending too much time with him. But I'm having trouble conveying this message to him. Because everytime I do, he gets sad as if I'm not interested in him anymore. Yet if I give in and we do end up having sex, it's not exciting, and I feel I'm only doing it to make him happy and get it over with! We used to be pretty regular with it in the past, but then again we only saw each other like 3 days a week, but lately I've been finding we only get about one night a week alone.

I need a way to get this message across to him without him getting offended by it. I've talked to him about it before and he just gets mopey and it makes me feel like a bad guy, which irritates me. We don't fiht or have any arguments nor do we play games with each other.

Ack I'm at a loss.

 

[Kennylingus]

That shit drives me nuts. You cannot give into the mopey pout bullshit, because it a lowblow move on his part. You need to set some boundries and it's very simple thing to do. You just have to be up front and say, hey I need some time to myself. I care about you and enjoy spending time with you, but I also need some alone time and you need to respect that. And if he's mopey or act's hurt by it, then too bad. If you let him dominate you like that by pouting you'll just resent him more and more.

 

[Seasoned]

I'm not going to say who he sounds like in my life, but I, too, fear he may have an addiction problem. I'm also wondering if one or both of his parents had an addiction issue and if he was raised in a dysfunctional family. If any of this is true there can be a healthy life ahead for you both, but it does take willingness and some hard work. Good luck to you both.

 

[Lube]

How often is all the time? Is it affecting his ability to keep a job or stay in school? Are you sure you're in love with him? Can you not find any way to satisfy him?

For most guys your "problem" would not be a problem, but it depends on how you answer these questions.

 

[slickery]

I might not have been clear I suppose. It's not on the issue of an addiction or a problem. It just on the fact that being around him all the time makes the "thrill" or lust I have for him fade, as if its all too predictable. Hence why it's difficult speaking to him about it.

It's just that everyday it's an issue. After spending the whole time after work with him, cuddling eating dinner, going to the pub, etc the thrill of the hooking up fades into predictable sex.

I know the problem stems from us spending too much time together, but I don't know how to tell him that without hurting his feelings because I know he thinks the world of me.

 

[ImBleedingLove]

try to find a good distraction to distract him whatever he likes besides sex lol o.o?

 

[Lube]

Spice it up. Make sure you're doing what you like to do, not just what he likes to do.

I've lived with my boyfriend for over a year, and we still have sex pretty much every day. One of our sex drives is greater than the other's, but neither of us is complaining.