bi, closeted, im into straight guys and want to pretty much just come out to everyone

[latinheat]

just get comfortable with telling yourself that your bi....imagine different people asking you about your orientation ha ha ha and uhhh u can't get straight guys so try for straight acting guys ha ha ha like myself....im barely coming to terms with calling myself gay but i feel like i don't have to lie to myself anymore anyways(your probably thinking this freak is rambling).....but the first person i told was my close girl friend whom is very religious but loved me more so have fun and good luck

 

[KaraBulut]

i guess i just wonder how many of these guys i secretly check out are checking me or other dudes out?

The best solution is to be out.

If a guy is interested and he discovers that you're openly bi, he'll be more inclined to talk to you.

Otherwise, he's on the other side of the room wondering, "I wonder how many of these guys are secretly checking me or other dudes out?".

 

[rareboy]

Yup. Just be honest with everyone. Especially the girls you are fucking and establish a relationship with. If you don't tell them, it will not turn out well for them...or for you.

 

[G-Lexington]

>>>The best solution is to be out. If a guy is interested and he discovers that you're openly bi, he'll be more inclined to talk to you.

Sorry, I don't believe this anymore.

I once did. That the best way to hook up with other guys was to let them know you're on the market - to wit, come out. But I've since learned there's a subset of queer guys. They're "straight-acting", and don't want anything to do with anything even remotely "gay". They don't want a relationship, and they most assuredly don't want any label on them other than "straight". They want everybody to think they're straighter than I-70 through Kansas, and I'd venture to say they don't even want to think of themselves as anything else but straight. But they still want to fool around with other guys.

This sounds like the kind of guy you want to hook up with. And if you want to hook up with them, the last thing you want to do is come out. Because these guys don't want to hook up with a known bisexual. Hell, most of them probably won't want to be in the same room as a known bisexual, fearing that the label might rub off onto him.

The other folks are right about one thing, though - coming out DOES make it a lot easier to find guys to go to bed with. But they might not be the kind of guys you want. If you really want no other guy than one who oozes heterosexuality from every pore, your best bet is to stay in the closet, and work on them individually. It'll take a LOT of work. There'll be a LOT of tea-leaf reading ("Does this mean he's interested? How about now?"), and more than a few dead ends. But if you're persistent, you'll eventually get a couple friends-with-benefits that nobody knows about but you.

I don't know too many guys who go this route. (How could I? I'm out. ) But to a man, they say it's worth it. It'll be up to you to decide if it's worth it for yourself.

Lex

 

[TX-Beau]

OK, "Straight acting," is what?

I know, do you? I know because I've been there. "Straight Acting," is closet drag, the deliberate affectation of an invented persona, intended to mask one's true identity. Only different from being a Drag Queen in intent.

So a word of advice, there is no such thing as "Straight Acting," we tell ourselves this because we don't want to be gay, because we haven't gotten to the point where we're comfortable with just being what we are.

Straight guys fuck women. That's acting straight, any guy who fucks other guys isn't straight, no matter what mind games he's playing with himself. Gay/Bi men who call themselves "straight acting," are pretty much just telling everyone else that they're not "really gay," they just fuck some guys every now and then - but the only people they fool, are themselves.

Actual straight guys don't give a fuck what you call yourself, you suck cock. And while one or two of them might avail themselves of someone's internalized homophobia, they're not going to be giving anything back.

If that's what you want, it's your life. But you'd be better off dealing with WHY you only find straight men attractive, WHY you only want closeted hookups, and what issues you have that are pushing you that direction.

There are plenty of hot, masculine gay men who'll actually kiss you, date you, love you; not dump in your mouth then run away pretending it never happened, or worse, throwing you to the wolves to protect themselves.

I know which I'd prefer.

 

[G-Lexington]

>>>And they will do anything to protect their "straight" image among their circle of friends, even if it means harming you in the process. Why reward guys like that with sex?

For starters, the reward isn't one-sided. The OP (or anyone in this situation - call him a "hunter") is going to be using the "straight" guy just as much as the "straight" guy will be using him. The hunter's reward is both the actual hunt (which many find extremely titillating and satisfying in its own right) and getting to actually have sex with a straight guy.

And yes, I know the guy isn't really "straight". But the guy at the end of a leash in an S&M relationships knows he really isn't a slave, either. He knows he could get up and walk away if he really wanted to. But sometimes people like to immerse themselves into their fantasy. Gay guys will never get to fuck straight guys, but this is as close as they'll probably come. And for some, that's close enough.

Lex

 

[latinheat]

not to be rude guys but his question was more about coming out, not "straight acting" douches ha haha ha lets please help him with this first than we'll warn him about why guys like that are no good