Bi-curiosity

[AndrienB]

I've always known that I kinda like both women and men. Both turned me on. I had sex with girls and recently decided that I should try it with a man too. I met a guy on the internet and we finally met and we hooked up. It wasn't full sex, it just involved lots of kissing and sucking . But I don't know if I liked it so much. He already started to tell me that we should meet again and maybe fuck next time although I told him that I was searching for an affair. Also I don't like the 'hidding' from friends and living a secret life. I like to look at guys and admire their beauty, I still like to look at gay porn but I don't know if I would want a relationship or physical contact anymore. So what would be your advice? Am I bisexual or just bi-curious?

 

[Rolyo85]

No such thing as bi-curious in my experience. It's just something guys with same-sex attraction have invented so that they can still call themselves straight.

Anyway, whether you're straight, gay or bi, what worries me is your assumption that it HAS to be hidden if it's same-sex. There's no shame in being who you are, whether that's straight, bi or even gay. There's only shame in hiding and living a lie.

 

[sixthson]

At this point you are curious only because you haven't had sex with a guy.

Lots of guys have posted here about being bi and interested in guys only for sex, but no thanks to the relationship part. I can't say I understand it, but it is what it is.

I have always wondered about something. How many times can a guy have sex with another guy and still call himself curious? At some point, don't you have to own up to what you are?

 

[TX-Beau]

I have always wondered about something. How many times can a guy have sex with another guy and still call himself curious? At some point, don't you have to own up to what you are?

HA you'd think so. I used to fuck around with this friend of my brother who told me in all sincerity he was just bi-curious. So now over a decade later - several guys later that I know of, he's STILL bi-curious.

 

[Medusa]

I've always known that I kinda like both women and men. Both turned me on. I had sex with girls and recently decided that I should try it with a man too. I met a guy on the internet and we finally met and we hooked up. It wasn't full sex, it just involved lots of kissing and sucking . But I don't know if I liked it so much. He already started to tell me that we should meet again and maybe fuck next time although I told him that I was searching for an affair. Also I don't like the 'hidding' from friends and living a secret life. I like to look at guys and admire their beauty, I still like to look at gay porn but I don't know if I would want a relationship or physical contact anymore. So what would be your advice? Am I bisexual or just bi-curious?

Just be Gay, and call it a Day. There is no need for you to be with women any longer.

 

[jkom1f]

Don't try to put a label on your sexuality if you do not feel that you fall staunchly into one category. Sexuality is fluid, and one's actions do not largely dictate how that person sees them self or how others see them. For example, various anthropological studies on this issue have found that many men have had some form of homosexual encounter (whether it's group masturbation, receiving a blow job, full on sex, what ever) to the point of climax at least once in their life, but define themselves as straight. Does one gay experience make a person gay for life? Does two? What's the cut off?

Really, there is no exact answer. It's why people shouldn't put so much stock into defining what they are into. They should just enjoy what it is that they enjoy doing sexually and let their history dictate any 'labeling' that may arise down the road. Are you more comfortable being called 'straight?' Than call yourself that. It doesn't mean you can't hook up with a guy every now and again if it fancies you.

As far as direct advice, stay away from online hookups, those guys are not good for anyone. Secondly, you'll never enjoy sex if you're always apprehensive and mentally disengaging from it, so don't rush into anything you're not comfortable with, there's no point because it won't be fun. Just stick with the porn and progress to something more material down the road if the opportunity presents itself and you find yourself taking advantage of it.

 

[Rolyo85]

When someone is almost exclusively having gay sex and has had some opposite sex experiences, I have no trouble believing they are gay. But when someone is having mostly opposite sex and some times ends up with a dude, calling themselves "straight" screams closet to me. Sexuality is not nearly this "fluid" and it's not equal on both ends because we do not live in a bisexual society, we live in a heteronormative one. To ignore the huge difference in perception and all the issues that most males still have with same sex attraction and the resulting desire to hide it, is naive. And the whole "sexuality is fluid and you shouldn't define yourself" argument to me is an excuse not to face reality. Like I said in my first advice to you, having a label to your sexuality grounds you and helps you build yourself into the person you want to be. Being ambiguous has helped nobody ever.

Online hookups can be a perfectly legitimate form of sex, if one is smart in how he goes about them. I have had many great experiences with online hooking up, and some truly awkward ones, but I've never had a BAD one.